About Allan Mott

Allan Mott was once accused of being a narcissistic goth lesbian by a disgruntled Amazon reviewer. That pretty much sums up his writing career (which includes 12 and 1/2 books and frequent contributions to such sites as XOJane, XOJaneUK, Canuxploitation, Bookgasm and Flick Attack,). His most personal writing can be found at VanityFear.com, where he uses the subject of B-Movies to mostly talk about boobs and stuff. Tweet him on the Twitter at @HouseofGlib.

What’s Your Special Holiday Wish?

6) This post goes viral and gets 257,659 hits.

YOU MUST CHOOSE! Holiday Movie Edition–Christmas Vacation or A Christmas Story?

You have to watch the Grizzwald family in National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation or the Parker family in A Christmas Story at least once every holiday season for the rest of your life, with the catch being that the film you DON’T choose gets eradicated out of existence forever. YOU MUST CHOOSE!

What Was Your Most Memorable Work Holiday Party?

Mine isn’t a tale of reckless debauchery, but it was one of the rare occasions where my nominal gifts actually managed to impress people rather than alienate them. Hopefully yours are a lot less boring.

Who’s Your Scrooge?

There probably hasn’t been a year where a new variation of A CHRISTMAS CAROL hasn’t been produced–whether it’s a movie, a TV special, a very special episode, a cartoon or something else entirely.

What’s Your Pick For the Most Essential Holiday Album?

What’s the one holiday album that you could listen to anytime of the year? The one that you think is as important as any other album its creator has ever released?

Why You’re Missing Out If You Refuse To Dine Out Alone

You may think it’s strange, but there’s a joy to dining solo that I haven’t been able to recreate anywhere else.

Who’s Your Favourite Singer Who Can’t Sing?

One of my weirdo hobbies is to try and imitate some of my favourite non-singing singers singing covers they are unlikely to ever perform.

Would You Go to Prison to Protect Someone Else?

You know they are guilty and it’s only a matter of time before they are sent to prison–where they will almost certainly be irreparably damaged.

What Do You Do When a Friendship Ends?

To deal with these emotions I think about all the things I have not lost. The friends who remain.

How Do You Handle Tension and Anger Online?

Thanks to the Internet we can read the temperature in the cultural room far more easily than ever before

What Childhood Fantasy Are You Glad Never Came True?

I say this because my dominant dream from my youth was pretty frickin’ dark and involved all of you no longer existing.

What Would You Do If You Were Andrew McCarthy in MANNEQUIN?

Would the love you experience be enough for you to put up with the rest of the world thinking you’re crazy? Or would you have to give up your fantasy for something people can actually believe?

The First Date Deal Breaker Files Part Nine: Winter Wonderland

There in the corner is an enormous elaborately decorated Christmas tree sitting beside an equally elaborate nativity scene constructed using department store mannequins.

What Would You Be the God Of?

You can totally be the God of Air Conditioning or the God of Easy Listening Music if that’s what you’re into.

Have You Ever Trolled? I Have.

It’s a weird sensation finding out that anonymous strangers don’t like you.

What Has Been Your Worst Experience With the Law?

It’s pretty easy to understand why so many people are very, very, very upset right now. Tell us about your worst experiences with the law. Let’s make this personal.