The word Purpose itself feels a little bit personal and it’s become one of those mysterious buzzwords that sells a lot of books in airports. It can feel embarrassing if you don’t “know” your purpose, so most people just don’t talk about it.
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I have led around 300 workshops on purpose and goal-setting… and I tend to hear a lot of nervous confusion when I say the word “purpose.” It’s no wonder. The word itself feels a little bit personal and it’s become one of those mysterious buzzwords that sells a lot of books in airports. It can feel embarrassing if you don’t “know” your purpose, so most people just don’t talk about it.
It’s okay, take a deep breath, I’m here to bust some myths and make purpose feel easy and fun again. I also made you a nice video if you’re a visual or auditory learner.
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Here are 5 confusing myths about purpose… and the truths that can help you live your most purposeful life.
Myth #1: You can complete your purpose.
Truth: Actually, purpose is about the journey.
Think of purpose not as a place on the map, but as a point on the compass.
This single myth can lead to identity crises every time you succeed (or fail) at a big goal.
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If you can complete your purpose, that’s probably more like a big goal… not a purpose. This single myth can lead to identity crises every time you succeed (or fail) at a big goal. Knowing your purpose is a point on the compass means that defining it can help you navigate the personal journey every day.
Soon you’ll get better at the process and you’ll start taking huge leaps.
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It takes real guts to see the baby steps and commit to the first one today. Celebrate the small steps as big accomplishments… it will motivate you to keep taking daily steps. Soon you’ll get better at the process and you’ll start taking huge leaps. If you add enough of those together you’ll find yourself full of achievements – but they’ll feel like happy side benefits instead of end goals.
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Myth # 2: Purpose is assigned by a higher intelligence.
Truth: Actually, purpose is personal.
In this case we are not talking about the purpose for the world’s existence – everyone is allowed their own answer for that one.
Victor Frankl said, “One should not search for an abstract meaning of life. Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life to carry out a concrete assignment which demands fulfillment.”
Victor Frankl said, “One should not search for an abstract meaning of life. Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life to carry out a concrete assignment which demands fulfillment.”
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Yes, you may have a deep connection to some divine wisdom, which may be helpful in determining your purpose; but the fear I see people develop is that they don’t have a purpose yet. Like they were picked last or forgotten by God or the Universe in a game of cosmic kickball.
You are not alone. You were not forgotten. You are allowed to explore. In fact, the more you can see the exploration phase as part of the process, the more you will be able to enjoy life and make deeper connections around your mission.
This is why travel played such an important role in my journey to purpose.
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Myth #3: Purpose is a single unchanging Truth.
Truth: Actually, purpose has layers.
A purpose rarely shows itself entirely at first. You get glimpses of it throughout life.
You knew your purpose 10 years ago… you were pursuing it… what happened?
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Sometimes it feels like you’ve been deserted. You knew your purpose 10 years ago… you were pursuing it… what happened?
More than likely, you punched through to a new layer and now your purpose has taken on a slightly different hue. You should get new clues to more deeply understand your purpose (and eventually, to help you move beyond needing to understand at all).
At each level there are new skills, new joys, new challenges, new relationships, and new realizations that will help you in your life.
Follow your compass, don’t rush through a level, and when the compass comes up funny… it’s time to dig deeper… and it’s time to celebrate.
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Myth #4: Purpose is about goals for Tomorrow.
Truth: Actually, purpose is about living fully everyday.
When you let go of the “achievement” piece around purpose, you get to stop postponing the feelings of living on purpose, and start feeling them today and everyday.
Time is slippery.
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Time is slippery. We let it get away from us when we believe in the myth of “tomorrow.” Goals in the distance are incredibly important, but only so we can extrapolate down to the steps directly in front of our feet.
We love Superman because he can fly right up to the peak without hindrance; but he doesn’t have to take the small steps that ascend him to a peak.
…the real super heroes are the ones who have a strong enough vision to get up and hike each day in the right direction, knowing the peak will be there when they are ready.
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You may be great at envisioning the peak and wanting desperately to get there; but the real super heroes are the ones who have a strong enough vision to get up and hike each day in the right direction, knowing the peak will be there when they are ready.
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Myth #5: Discovering your Purpose is really really hard.
Truth: Actually, you’re probably looking right past it. It can be easy.
Purpose is not actually that complicated. It is paradoxical sometimes, but it doesn’t have to be hard.
…it’s so obvious to you that you don’t even see it. It’s like a fish trying to explain what water is…
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Purpose often starts as a curiosity or a list of curiosities that you follow passionately for no reason except that it makes you feel connected or fulfilled. It has often woven itself through your life as an intangible skill or predisposition. It has helped you in times of need and in times of fun or deep connection with other people. It probably has a one-word name, and it’s so obvious to you that you don’t even see it. It’s like a fish trying to explain what water is (credit to David Foster Wallace – “This is Water”).
If you’re stuck, ask yourself, “if I were to give a gift to everyone in the world, with no gain except in the giving of it, what would I give?”
It is how you’d like to measure your life, and it is the single greatest thing you will learn, according to Harvard Business professor Clayton Christensen.
It is your great and glorious masterpiece, according to Michel de Montaigne.
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According to Frankl, “We can discover this meaning in life in three different ways:
- By creating a work or doing a deed.
- By experiencing something or encountering someone.
- By the attitude we take toward unavoidable suffering.”
If you continue to get roadblocks, you are welcome to download the complimentary Empowerment Quickstart Guide that I made for you.