Why math is important. Science too.

“I mean, some cars tires turn faster than others…” Chelsea Tuesday night my Muse texted me with a link to a YouTube video and implored me to watch it because, “The dumb bitch really had me laughing.”  Having nothing better to do at the moment, I clicked on the link and proceeded to be surprised [...]

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Elway, Manning, Tebow and why God hates me

 He’s the kind of guy that you hate with a passion, until he comes to your team.   I’m a Raider fan and make no apologies for that.  I’ve loved the Raiders since I was a kid and I will  until the day I die.  I tell you this so you understand why I’m saying [...]

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Whitney’s greatest love of all

“Yeah,” I replied.  “Pretty much.” By now everyone knows Whitney Houston died last month, most likely from overdosing on prescription pills.  I began writing this post almost immediately after her death but my Muse talked me into waiting “a while” before doing so.  I looked at a calendar this afternoon and noted that its been [...]

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The Dodgers are insane

  And in related news, rape victims are partially to blame.       First things first, I am NOT a Dodgers fan.  Nor am I a Giants fan.  I grew up watching the Angels and have long loved the Cubs.  This isn’t a story about baseball, but about ultra-wealthy greedy people who try to [...]

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The baby at the gas station

You are truly rad.  Your friend? Not so much. UPDATE:  It’s now being reported that the mother GAVE the baby to the woman at the gas station and that the baby was never actually dumped in a bag.  Let’s go ahead and add “What kind of crazy bitch fakes this story?” to the mix.   [...]

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Other priorities

What do you have? Here’s a great story for you.  My ex, Baby Mama, is behind on paying child support to me.  When we first split she was hurting financially so I didn’t pursue the issue.  I was trying to be a nice guy.  Almost nine years later she decided to step up to the [...]

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My Two Cents–Penn State

I apologize in advance if this gets, uh, animated.  It could possibly be the best 2:38 of your day.  Or maybe not.  I guess you’ll have to look and find out.        

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Screw it

“Holy crap.  No.  I’m not happy.  Don’t tell me to screw it.”               Wednesday, November 9.  4:37 PM   My 14-year-old Drama Queen stays with grandma on Wednesday nights because I do my radio show from 8:00- 9:30, then come back to my studio to knock out 5 Minute [...]

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Secret Agent Man

  Grab a cocktail and enjoy.               The daily grind is much quieter now that Jesus moved to a location that should triple his tailoring business.  There are times I like it and times I don’t. When I remember the times he rolled back in after work with a [...]

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Subway and Double D’s

 “Hey.  How’s it goin?”  Is rhetorical.  We really don’t care.       It’s 10:06 on Wednesday night and I’m sitting at the counter in my hovel with my laptop open, iTunes blaring Stricken by Disturbed through my headphones and with a Subway sandwich on my left side.  At my right is a mostly-full Pacifico [...]

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The Colonel is a hypocrite (and possibly racist)

“…C’mon.  Let’s go watch the Dukes of Hazzard.” Redneck Kentucky Senator             The other day I’m sitting outside my office, enjoying a refreshing beverage (Dew) on a sunny day, when suddenly my phone vibrated.  I looked to see what it was and noticed it was an E-mail from KFC.  I’m [...]

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Light beer commercials are lame

“Stay thirsty, my friends.” The Most Interesting Man In The World         Lets be honest, domestic light beers all basically taste the same.  It doesn’t matter if it’s Coors Light, Miller Lite or Bud Light, you’re pretty much getting the same crappy taste for the same low price.  As I heard Adam [...]

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Why I hate the Broncos: Or, Tim Tebow is a douche

As I said on the radio (more than once), “I can’t wait for the day Tim Tebow gets busted in the back seat of a VW with a transvestite hooker.” Me   The opening week of the NFL finishes as it should, with the Raiders traveling to Mile High to play the Denver F’ing Broncos.  [...]

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I’ll have you know, sir

I pity your children. I’m not changing the name of the person who e-mailed me because, well, because I don’t really want to.  Sorry if that makes me a dick, but he e-mailed me knowing full well I was a blogger.  So, if you think about it, it’s really his own fault.  Yeah.  Sweet. If [...]

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White dudes can’t dance

Chastity Bono had her front door permanently sealed, which means Chaz Bono is a dude.         I’m not a racist.  Nor am I sexist, homophobic or anything else that would suggest I don’t like people based on their skin color, religion or any other shit like that.  If I don’t like someone [...]

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An open Letter to Motel 6

Tell Tom Bodett not to keep the light on for me, because I’m never coming back to their dumpy shitboxes.         I wrote this post on Tuesday and sent the link to Motel 6 Customer Service.  I also put it on their Facebook fan page.  Four other people sent it to Motel [...]

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