This comment is by wet_suit_one on the post Technology, Shame and the Death of the Porn Store.
I still don’t see how [ubiquitous porn use] can lead to shame. In fact, I’m not sure that it does lead to shame in women as it merely asserted by one person and not proved as such. I know that a number of women feel that porn (or any image for that matter) sets the standard of what men will accept, but I know for a fact that that is just crazy. Men really don’t care that much. They fantasize about Playboy models and pornstars the way they fantasize about becoming Jedi Knights and Great Heroes in fantasy novels. They know that that is not the real world and they know that the chick they had a crush on in grade 6 or 9 or high school is what is real and what is achievable in the real world and can accept that. If they don’t accept that, they generally become rock stars (who have a real shot at the supermodel woman) or as rich as they possibly can. They do not, however, expect pornstars, nor do they expect women to be like pornstars.
They will, of course, get the best woman they possibly can. And if a man only considers how a woman looks and how she behaves in the sack in deciding on a woman (and yes, such men do exist, but they aren’t the majority), they’re complete morons because any reasonable or sane man knows there’s more to a woman than her looks. There’s a song by the Northern Pikes called “She Ain’t Pretty She Just Looks that Way” which is about this very point. A man either learns this the easy way or the hard way. Either way, most men learn this, even though (like any rational happiness maximizer) they still try and get the most attractive woman they can. Note, the men seeking the most attractive woman possible predated porn (remember the Trojan War which was caused by Helen, the face (ass, breasts, legs and all the rest of it too no doubt) that launched a thousand ships?