This comment was from Tom B. on the post “Close Call: My Brush with Suicide” by Tim Pylypiuk
“But shouldn’t the root of why a person wants to commit suicide be addressed first? I would’ve felt better if the validation for what I had been going through was met instead of being given the verdict of lock and key from the outset.”
First things first and that’s to identify the ideation as being the first concern. Once a person is no longer a threat to himself, then it’s time to address what got him to that point where he felt so down. But the sad reality is that with men in particular, society hasn’t addressed their mental health needs as they should. Feelings of hopelessness as well as helplessness enter the picture long before it reaches the point that the guys starts to look at suicide. Identifying those feelings and addressing them early on is vital for guys but they don’t do it.
I’ve known three guys personally that have followed through with their suicides and I have to tell ya, they sure as heck never let anyone know. All three appeared to be on top of their game but appearances are deceptive. There are so many things happening in mens lives that society just doesn’t have a clue. Men are great at hiding their feelings and accordingly, people can’t see what’s happening to them.
I work with adolescents in a residential facility and I can tell ya, a lot of these guys struggle with these feelings. “Hopelessness” plays a big role in how they feel. And these feelings are not exclusive to any socioeconomic group. We have what is called “MISA” (mental illness substance abuse) clients. What comes first? Substance abuse because of mental illness or mental illness that resulted in substance abuse? Unfortunately, we’re unable to deal with either because of the limits set for long term care (including out-patient). “Kid-care” which is a state program has a lot of limits so the efficacy of the programs are limited. A lot of work to be done in an unreasonable amount of time.
What it comes down to is what you said. Identifying the problem that brings guys to that place in their life.
Take care my friend … thanks again for sharing.
Photo: familymwr / flickr