This is a comment by Keith, John, and John D on the post “On Women and Casual Sex – Part II: Flings, One Night Stands and Same Night Lays“.
“These articles tell us that women are selective just because they have a risk of being sexually violated or having their reputation tarnished. They don’t mention that even if these factors were removed, hypothetically, women would still be much more picky than men and have higher standards because they just find fewer men physically and sexually appealing. They are just predisposed to find fewer men attractive. That or maybe nature just creates more ugly men than women. This is the root of the conundrum.
“In casual sex encounters, men are generally a lot more friendly, courteous than women. The women have a lot more leverage, they usually get to decide when where and how. Men are more insecure about their ‘performance’, They are more likely to ask her number for future (it’s usually up to the woman to decide if she wants to do it again). Women are more likely to kick a man out of bed after its over.”
“Let’s think about this, most women spend their days taking care of their appearance. They worry about their weights and body shape, so they are dieting.They taking care of their hairs, using hair treatment products to make their hair looks smooth and good. They go to hair saloon. They taking care of their skin using various body lotion, moisturizer, body scrub, etc. They like go shopping and searching for nice clothes which will make them look better. Men? Lets admit it, most of us do not taking care of our appearance and we don’t know how to dress.
“And you complain how women think most men are not physically/sexually appealing? I workout, taking care of my appearance, and I find nice fitted clothes. And I have receive many compliment from women (and men) about how good my looks. Its easy, if you want women to find you physically attractive just work for it.”
John D said:
“Since men are saddled with the majority of burden to put themselves out there and initiate, quiet introverted girls can and do get indications of interest from men. What sounds like a human issue is really just a female entitlement issue. The social burden for men to risk being rejected puts women into a position of entitlement and control.
“If I went through life getting daily indicators of interest and messages I was desirable as most women do, I would be very entitled and picky too and never settle for ‘just sex’ but would feel I could screen for only GREAT SEX. Especially if I was getting indicators of interest about every 40 minutes (as even plain women do).
“When men are entitled we are called on our bullshit. When women are entitled, men are told ‘You’re doing it wrong. Here’s how to re-define yourself to fit into the average entitled women’s narrow mold of a necessary mate for GREAT SEX (since women don’t need or want ‘just sex’ like men do).’”
Photo credit: Flickr / Josef Seibel