This comment was from wellokaythen on the post “Are Women Contributing to the Demise of Men?” by Tom Matlack on the Good Feed Blog.
I don’t think boys are being targeted or neglected so much as given the wrong sort of attention. Boys still seem to get more attention in school than girls do, and this may actually hurt boys more than girls in the long run. My impression is that girls are more often left to fend for themselves in K-12, so by the time they reach traditional college age they’re often more independent than boys are, because they’ve had to be. As a college instructor, I’ve gotten calls and e-mails from a dozen mothers asking me to find some way to give their grown sons a passing grade, sons who never showed up to class, by the way, but no calls ever from any parents about their daughters. The average grades that male students and female students get in my classes are essentially the same, and they fail my classes at the same rate, so it’s not like I’m clearly favoring one over the other. I’m trying to find an expression that’s more sympathetic than “being coddled,” but it’s difficult.
Sometimes the attention that’s meant to help and protect and diagnose and treat may make the situation worse in the long run.
There is clear evidence of different developmental paths between boys and girls, and it’s hard to say that it’s just cultural gender bias. Boys are at least 5 times more likely to be stutterers than girls, for example. I find it hard to believe there’s no physiological brain difference going on there. I’ve been a stutterer since elementary school. I’ve met dozens of other male stutterers in all sorts of contexts, but I’ve never met a female stutterer outside of group therapy. They hide it better, or else the “5 times as likely” is overly conservative. Anyway, I bring this up because in the case of stuttering the wrong sort of intervention with a boy can simply reinforce the behavior and define him as something actually could have grown out of otherwise. A boy diagnosed with ADHD will not be treated as a boy who just happens to have it, but he will be defined by it for the rest of his education, maybe the rest of his life. He’ll drag that diagnosis like a big sign over his head all through school.
I read somewhere a curious evo bio explanation that said that boys are more rambunctious and physical and restless because males have evolved to be hunters, so that’s why it’s hard for them in school to sit still or be quiet or pay focused attention. But, wouldn’t you be a BAD hunter if you couldn’t sit still or be quiet or pay focused attention?
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photo: way2go / flickr
It seems to me teachers and parents these days refuse to fail students. Just give them ADHD pills to catch up with the rest of their peers, and parents and school staff are mutually happy. ADHD meds are stimulants, which gives you more focus and stamina, which people otherwise would not achieve on effort alone; this is similar to steroids athletes use to enhance their performance…it helps you cheat. If ADHD pills helps give you an edge, then all the more power to you. In most third world countries and some families, they substitute ADHD pills with corporal punishment; this… Read more »
ADHD is for hyperactive kids, is there an opposite version…to help the quiet kids get more active and LOUD? They need this edge too. I know from being a newcomer, I was shy as a kid and so were my brothers, we could have used the help of a drug to break out of our shells. Drug companies go to work! Create a drug for the quiet / introverted people too!
Your attitude is disgusting regarding medication to help people with a very serious condition. Seriously, please educate yourself because quite frankly it’s offensive and alarmist. If you think hyperactive is the only trait of ADHD then you really really really need to educate yourself.
I did read up on it before posting anything on this thread. http://www.psychologytoday.com/basics/adhd
ADHD kids, are kids; incorrigible kids. I know of a lot of young kids who would fit this description:
“Some simply cannot concentrate; some become disruptive and defiant and have trouble getting along with parents, peers, or teachers.” In fact, I know of teenagers and even adults who would fit this description. Just look at the incarcerated…the majority would fit those traits to a T.
Poor impulse control is common amongst criminals. I asked my psychiatrist what happens when adults don’t get the right treatment or medication for Adult ADD/ADHD, and he said point blank quite a lot of them end up in jail. ht tp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ADHD – has a more indepth view into the disorder. ht tp://faculty.washington.edu/chudler/adhd.html – This seems alright too. And it talks about the heavy prescription which seems to be a US based phenomenon. I totally agree it’s bad to overprescribe but I do believe the disorder is real but it’s most likely overdiagnosed in the USA from what I hear. There… Read more »
Sounds to me the pills are being used to modify behavior; create some conformity. Like I said, in my native country and other third worlds…they don’t have pills for bad behavior or hyperactivity — what they have is corporal punishment. It is free and mostly effective; they create quiet and obedient kids/people …but then they might not adjust well to “modern life” whose pace is fast and whose culture/environment and people are aggressive and competitive — dog eat dog.
Well unless we start beating kids again, what are the alternatives? And yeah pills are used to modify behaviour because the behaviours can be disruptive to a persons life. Anti-depressants, anti-anxiety medication, ADHD meds are to help control brain chemistry to control mood. It’s not a bad thing unless used for the wrong reasons, if the non-medicated brain is causing disruption to a life then why not alter it via training and/or medication? The other option is to change society to allow for different learning styles and a wider variety of people. Also remember third world countries don’t usually have… Read more »
What pills are you taking??? “There are thousands of children everyday who emigrant from third world countries to western countries and get thrown into “modern life” — totally new environment with zero English….Should we recommend ADHD pills or develop new drugs for them to adjust to this modern life/culture shock??? There’s a market for that…let’s diagnose a “culture shock disorder” and have the drug companies make money off of them.” Is America seriously that bad? I’ve never heard of that stuff here in Australia because it’s irresponsible to give medication, especially stimulants with abuse potential, to people that don’t need… Read more »
Well if you’re the poster child for how well ADHD pills work for you Archy, and just so we’re not biased or playing favoritism – I request drug companies create a drug version opposite of ADHD pills, for the quiet / introverted kids and adults. Shy and quiet kids are often picked on, and usually result in students doing poorly in school, and as adults get passed over for promotions or jobs…this hampers their money earning prospects. this is a very real problem…society for the most part sees quiet/introverted as a problem too. Excelling academically does not always guarantee a… Read more »
Well firstly it depends on why they are shy? Is it fear? Social anxiety (I have this). There already is treatment for anxiety disorders and even just shyness. Cognitive behavioural therapy helps with raising the confidence/self esteem of people and can allow them to have a more positive outlook and focus. You can teach them how to socialize better, conversation tips, how to handle criticism and insults, how to protect yourself if sensative (something I recently have been learning). Exposure in a slow but steady way can help to “reprogram” the mind so if you can have social experiences that… Read more »
I used to be painfully shy…and had social anxiety too. But I’ve overcome those, so I don’t consider myself any of those now. Mind you, without any drugs. I just don’t like dealing with dumbasses…power-trippers and entitled people, narcissists AND I don’t like being around these types of people. LOL. How do we get them on something? Or I would like to tie a string to their Pinocchio noses and pull it to the ground…they’re just sticking way too high. I’m actually opposed to medicating myself…I’ve only been on antibiotics and flu shots. I don’t do any of the other… Read more »
I have autism, not ADHD (how did that become the main topic of discussion, anyway?), so I can’t speak to the experience of those who do, but I will say that the best thing I ever did for myself academically was to get rid of all the “supports” the school system put in place. And make no mistake, I had to fight to get rid of them. I had to fight not to be sent to an exclusively special education high school, I had to fight to get off the medications that were causing me to become emotionally imbalanced and… Read more »
As an adult sufferer of ADD/ADHD I fully believe in it existing but I do see how it can be overdiagnosed. The pills I am on do not tranquilize me but simply give me more control over focus and impulsive behaviour. Instead of my brain jumping around heaps to multiple subjects I can stay on track with one and motivation increases. Getting the right medication is key but from the effects I have with mine it basically makes me less rushed in doing things, my handwriting dramatically improves because I take more time to draw the letters properly instead of… Read more »
“A boy diagnosed with ADHD will not be treated as a boy who just happens to have it, but he will be defined by it for the rest of his education, maybe the rest of his life. He’ll drag that diagnosis like a big sign over his head all through school.” I think that’s very true. I don’t believe in ADHD; that’s a disorder which exist mainly in westernized countries, and I don’t think this for a lack of diagnosis tools in other countries. We like to pop pills whether that’s for recreation or to treat symptoms. There’s a pill… Read more »
The pressure to medicate comes overwhelmingly from a public school system unwilling to accommodate children with different styles of learning. It is also my experience that teachers and staff (overwhelmingly female, especially in the younger grades) see a lot of behavior common to many young boys as problematic or pathological. That said, I’ve met people with very real problems (I’m one of them) and the failure to diagnose conditions like autism in girls (I’ve heard from the author of a book on the subject of Asperger Syndrome in women that the signs are seen as being more “natural” in young… Read more »
Actually the most successful hunters would be quite alert and jumpy, which does explain ADHD a fair bit. The person who is overly cautious, easily distracted usually means their senses are also quite high, I would hear every damn little noise at school and certain noises instantly distracted me and put me on alert. I’d say ADHD people are best suited to high stimulation environments that are ever changing, eg hunting and war. Not all hunting is sitting quietly waiting patiently and if you’re sitting all day waiting for food then you’re doing it wrong, bursts of high speed +… Read more »
Huh. Well, the more you know, I guess.
Certainly does a lot to explain why my friends with ADHD always beat me in video games.
The drugging on young boys says more about those doing the drugging than about the boys.
History will judge this act poorly,and rightfully so.
Speaking as someone who was subjected to a different drug every six months as a child despite the fact that THERE ARE NO DRUGS TO TREAT AUTISM, I am inclined to agree with you. The kind of attention diagnosed boys receive is poisonous, often violent, alienates them from their peers, encourages a lack of personal responsibility and is often administered by women (I’ve only ever met three male social workers) who have absolutely no understanding of the conditions they’re supposed to be helping to treat. I am also inclined to agree with the author of this article that whoever came… Read more »