Michael Lombardi takes issue with video pranks made popular by TV personality Jimmy Kimmel. What are we teaching our children by making them cry, and then taping it for the world to see, and laugh at?
Picture this. You get home, and your girlfriend is holding her phone up to record your reaction. You quizzically say, “So are you ready to go out to dinner?” She responds, “Oh, I already went to dinner. Just got back.” Even more confused you say, “I thought we were going together.” “I have to confess,” she says still taping your reaction, “I got really hungry and went with this guy from work instead. But don’t worry, I’ll be hungry again and maybe you can have dinner with me some other time.”
You’d probably have some choices words for your girlfriend. I hope you wouldn’t let them get past your internal filter, but you would need to have a talk about her breaking plans to go to dinner with another guy. Now what if she told you that she was just kidding, there was no guy from work and she hadn’t gone to dinner without you? You would likely be feeling relief and confusion, right?
And then she says she was kidding. She’d planned the whole thing and wanted to putting your reaction on the Internet? You would probably need to add anger to your emotions in that moment. Who would even watch that? Would a video of a guy getting his heart ripped out go viral?
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Now, turn the dinner into Halloween candy and the man into a child. String it together with a dozen other instances of heartbreak caught on camera, throw it on a late night show, and you have millions of views within days. Viral. Money. A lot of adults chuckling and a lot of children crying and wondering why their parents had played such a (cruel) joke on them.
This week, Jimmy Kimmel aired his 5th annual YouTube challenge I Told My Kids I Ate Their Halloween Candy. This is a compilation video of parents telling their kids they their candy while videoing their reactions. The parents play along for minutes, which feels like an eternity when you watch these kids’ reactions. They are destroyed, crying, betrayed, furious. The adults watching howl with laughter. Every year. But, like the previous four years, millions of views and laughs later, some of us are not laughing.
These kids trust their parents, or trusted their parents. How much was that worth? A laugh on a late night show.
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I admit that it can be funny to see kids overreacting. But, then empathy kicks in. Just because a tiny Snickers is insignificant in my life—and even if it was, I could easily go to the store and buy another one eight times larger for what amounts to the change in my cupholder—doesn’t mean a tiny Snickers is insignificant. That tiny Snickers means something. It means something to someone I love. And then it’s not funny. And, it’s a breach of trust. These kids trust their parents, or trusted their parents. How much was that worth? A laugh on a late night show.
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The argument has been made that the world is tough and it’s our job as parents to make sure that kids can handle a tough world. A world that isn’t fair. A world where people who are bigger than you or with more power than you take what you love. I don’t buy it.
When you lie to your kids, and then laugh about it, what you’re teaching them is that it’s OK to hurt others, and to make jokes at the expense of others for the sake entertainment.
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The world is tough; no argument from me there. But, this is not the place to teach that lesson. Because that’s not the lesson you’re teaching when you film your kids’ responses to you pranking them, lying to them for a laugh. When you lie to your kids, and then laugh about it, what you’re teaching them is that it’s OK to hurt others, and to make jokes at the expense of others for the sake entertainment. And in this case, it’s big entertainment. It’s worldwide, never going away, on the Internet forever, entertainment.
It’s important for kids to learn the difference between honesty and deception. It’s important for them to discern fantasy from reality. It’s important for them to learn to think critically and not take the world at face value. So when you lie to your kids and tell them tales of a little flying tooth enthusiast because you want them to experience the same magical innocence you did as a child, that’s OK, that’s letting them be a kid. When you lie to your kids for your own laughs, that’s not healthy.
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Some of these kids’ reactions are funny. It doesn’t even bother me that you laugh. It does, however, bother me that people do this to their kids and not only save the video, but archive it indefinitely on the Internet. Do you really want a meltdown you had as a preschooler on YouTube? In situations like these, a little bit of “how would I feel?” would go a long way. I don’t want my kids to fear me, I want them to respect me. And if I don’t respect them, why should they do the same for me?
Photo Credit: Getty Images
I couldn’t agree more. Some kids in the videos seem to take the prank in stride, and some of the reactions are definitely funny — when the kids don’t seem to be hurt. And some of those kids are a little bit spoiled, probably. But for the kids who are really hurt, or the kids who are just outright confused, It seems to me that this prank sends a few key messages: 1. Your sense of your personal property is a joke to me. 2. I made a joke out of it because I want to be famous. 3. I… Read more »
Thanks, Matt. I agree that this just comes down to parents not being able to put themselves in their kids shoes. Makes me wonder what else the parents mock their kids about.