Survivor’s Tales: Victims of Abuse, Come Forward

Tim Pylypiuk calls all victims of female abuse to share their experiences, hoping that those who’ve been singled out and bullied can now come together in common story.

“No more turning away
From the week and the weary.
No more turning away
From the coldness inside.
Just a world that we all must share.
It’s not enough just to stand and stare.
Is it only a dream that they’ll be,
No more turning away.”

—“On The Turning Away,” Pink Floyd

♦◊♦

Since the fruits of my labor were borne from “Bullied By Girls And Women: One Man’s Tale” and “My Guilt,” there have been traces of immense inspiration churning these creative juices. Both my contributions garnered praiseworthy platitudes, the likes of which I had never experienced in mainstream society. The flock has begun to congregate.

This got me thinking carefully about the next step to take. I had planned for just the right epilogue to my trilogy. But the comments these articles attracted gives a pause for consideration of something different.

Rather, for an idea that involves you readers. For when narratives shift to areas unexplored, it takes more than the moon alone to cause it. The tides, when influenced enough, are as vital in the waves they make.

Here’s your chance to jumpstart the light that’ll scatter the shadows that were used to loitering sans consequence. Give it full power from the energy of your experiences.

There are more survivors like me out there, recovering from and dealing with their trauma under the merciless haranguing wrought by female perpetrators or bullies. For those of you who fit that description, this will be your moment.

I’m going to end this article shortly with a cliff-hanger only you can complete that will involve one formula alone:

Your stories.

Everyone, emerge from your hiding places. Spin your tale, weave the fabric. “Give me your tired, your poor. Your huddled masses yearning to be free,” as the poem goes.

Anyone out there pining to exorcise the demons shackling their legs, do it below in the commentary section. Leave no hurt and pain inside. Let it all out.

Regardless of your gender, age, race, religion, ethnicity, color, creed, or mental capacity, whatever part of the world you inhabit, all are welcome to provide their tales of abuse, neglect, and hurt from any girl or woman who dealt harm upon your person either in the past or present.

Let’s show everyone that abuse from women and girls are NOT isolated incidences, that we are neither anomalies nor less of a priority. The sooner society hears us as one voice, the stronger a shift can occur.

That’s enough pomp and circumstance from me. I will finish with the following comments that have fulfilled their part in the inception of this haven:

From Jill:

I was a shy, socially awkward girl and I was bullied relentlessly by a group of “mean girls” through grade school and jr. high. One of my few friends was a boy who was picked on by the same crowd. To this day, I have a visceral dislike of women who remind me of the “popular” crowd in school (cheerleaders, sorority girl types, etc.) as I had so many bad experiences with those types of girls.

From Lori Day: 

I was also bullied quite a lot by both boys and girls. The bullying by girls was the meanest in my own experience. One thing I can say is that mean girl bullying–while crueler than ever due to the use of social media–is getting a lot more attention today. When Tim was a boy, there were way fewer resources for dealing with it and the culture of bullying was largely ignored by adults. When Tim was young, boys and girls were rampantly bullied by boys and girls in every combination, and there was little help available. Back then, female bullying was less recognized and chastised than the male bullying.

Today things are changing. Bullying in general is now recognized by adults as a huge problem, sometimes leading to suicide, and bullying perpetrated by both genders is seen for what it is, well described, and now legally reportable. Schools have strict accountability. It doesn’t take care of it all, but at least people are not willfully “not seeing it” as much as used to be the case.

I have never believed that childhood bullying was perpetrated only or mostly by boys. As a longtime school administrator, I saw it perpetrated about equally by both genders, but in different ways. The title and description of this article make it sound as if the author were only abused by girls, but in the text he makes clear that he was bullied by both genders. This is important. We must all recognize that bullying crosses all gender lines in terms of perpetrators, victims and bystanders. Neither gender bullies more than the other, and neither gender gets bullied more than the other. Unfortunately, there is plenty to go around for everyone.

And special thanks to Juliana Bjornsdottir of Iceland Review Online, www.icelandreview.com. “Bullied By Girls And Women” was partially based on a letter written to her from me in the letters section of said publication and whom I’ve had the honour of receiving a positive and inspirational response of support for my story.

She’s also a feminist, which proves that those who do care are from all walks of life.

Thank you, Juliana.

Note: This haven is intended to be safe, supportive, and validating for the survivors who comment. Any responses centering on patriarchy, male privilege, who has it worse, and excuses for the female perpetrators/bullies are not welcome. Take it elsewhere, please.

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About Tim Pylypiuk

Tim Pylypiuk is an autistic writer and performance artist who has worked with autistic people of all ages for ten years.

Comments

  1. Some of the stories on here are horrific. I appreciate the courage of those sharing them.

  2. As do I, Big D.

    But we need more survivors coming forth. Come on everyone, let’s show that female abuse and bullying is not to be taken lightly.

  3. @ Eagle33

    It shouldn’t be taken lightly regardless of the number of people who tell their stories on this thread or any other.

    Also, this is a rough time of year for internet-related participation. Remind people again about this post after New Years. :)

  4. I wish I could contribute, Eagle, it’s a good thing you’re doing. The worst I’ve suffered from women has been the usual everyday stuff–rudeness, insensitivity, selfishness, etc. Nothing that reaches the level of actual ‘abuse,’ I’m happy to say.

  5. Yes, Typhone. I will.

    The beat goes on, as always, no matter what year.

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