Growing up next to Ferguson, Sarafina Bianco thought she understood. But she didn’t—until now.
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White privilege?
I have it.
It’s not that I didn’t already know it existed before Mike Brown’s death and its aftermath, but it was certainly easy for me to overlook. As I’ve written here before, it’s a tragic thing to watch your childhood home burn down. And, as the grand jury decision was read last Monday and the local news stations began showing the assemblies becoming riots, well, it hit again. This time? It was more personal, more painful and disheartening.
But other than the finality of it all, I wasn’t sure why it affected me so deeply. A decision. A reaction. A town left to pick up the pieces and move forward.
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Some of my writing friends kept telling me this was “so much bigger than Ferguson,” and I wanted to agree. I wanted to acknowledge the truth, but couldn’t because I was too traumatized by what was happening four miles down the street from me. I was angry, begging the world to stop focusing on us and move on to something else. To stop adding lighter fluid to a situation that didn’t need any more.
Now, a week out, I’m learning my reaction is probably due to the fact that my world is vastly different than the one of those who grew up beside me.
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Now, a week out, I’m learning my reaction is probably due to the fact that my world is vastly different than the one of those who grew up beside me.
My childhood in north county was good. My education was excellent, I shone in class and in extra curricular activities. My classrooms were always filled with people from many socio-economic classes and many races. Leaving here to go to college out of town, I was shocked when the majority of students were white. Really.
Then, when I entered teaching, I often told my students, who only knew what their parents told them, the best thing they could do for themselves was find a way to be surrounded by diversity, even just for a day. That’s the message I’ve been preaching for the last eight years.
Then this happened.
And I realize I don’t have it all together.
I’ve still been given the benefit of the doubt for my entire life. I don’t know what it’s like to have to worry about the police every time I see them.
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It’s not okay for me to say “I want the world to leave us alone” because, even though I grew up next to the people who are hurting, I didn’t grow up as them. People will leave me alone, and they’ll trust me and respect my request, but there’s a whole race of people who don’t get the same treatment. Sure, I better understand and appreciate the cultural differences between a variety of people, but I’ve still been given the benefit of the doubt for my entire life. I don’t know what it’s like to have to worry about the police every time I see them.
And Ferguson has shown me this for the first time in my 32 years.
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At first I was angry because of it. It’s not my fault there is anger all around me. If I had it my way everyone would be loved equally and unconditionally. And even though I genuinely try to live my life with these codes at the forefront of my mind, and even though I want to believe I’m better at accepting everyone, the last week has proven me wrong.
And so, here I am, humbled by my ignorance, wanting to reach out and ask what I can do better, how I can help.
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I don’t understand because I haven’t lived it. All my justifications and explanations come from what I have experienced, not what they have. And so, here I am, humbled by my ignorance, wanting to reach out and ask what I can do better, how I can help.
It’s not a crime to have flaws or learn from them. But it is absolutely dangerous to believe that if you’re sitting on the sidelines talking about how you’re effected without actively seeking a solution, then you’re part of the problem.
And I know there are plenty of people who are willing and ready to attack my words. But I want them to first think about this:
Just because something isn’t your fault or didn’t start with you, does that mean you can’t help find a solution? Does that mean you can’t try to love more than you already think you are?
Doesn’t living the same life that’s comfortable for you, at the detriment of someone else, make your bliss-filled ignorance part of the problem?
And are you willing to do something about it?
Photo—Fibonacci Blue/Flickr
Making this a race issue will ensure that it still happens. Here is why: police are never indicted for life ending actions, regardless of the race of the person that lost their life. Until this trend of no-indictment is targeted and changed it will keep happening, to both races but to black men more. The racial infighting is just distracting enough to keep us from identifying the missing link (indictments). Divide and conquer.
This issue is first and foremost a question of tactics. I’ve only briefly seen that touched on in the many articles I’ve read. Are the hard questions going to be asked? Or will we fear the results too much to change?
Let’s face it. If the cop who shot Michael Brown has been a white woman instead of a white man, then this entire public conversation would be totally different. Then, “the issue” would be how violent and dangerous men are, how hard it is to be a woman in our society, and how it’s important for women to have the means to defend themselves. Then, the cop’s acquittal would be considered a victory, and Michael Brown would be just one more villain showing society’s misogyny. If she had been indicted, leftists would have been outraged by that gross injustice. This… Read more »
Steve, you mean like the female officer who shot the unarmed guy at McDonald a years ago?
“Officer Who Shot And Killed Unarmed Homeless Man Will Not Be Charged” “Guidry said she was afraid he would try to take her gun and that it would be a “fight for her life,” so she shot him once in the chest when he was about three feet away.”
http://laist.com/2014/06/10/officer_who_shot_and_killed_unarmed.php
you can see the video here http://losangeles.cbslocal.com/2013/08/01/eyewitness-records-santa-ana-officer-shoot-kill-unarmed-homeless-man/
Yes, excellent example. In our society, it’s always more acceptable for a woman to gun a man down than for a man to gun a man down. Meanwhile, the dead man is just as dead either way.
A female cop shoots a man, and we’re supposed to think of our daughters in danger. A male cop shoots a man, and we’re supposed to think of our sons as gunshot victims and hate the shooter. Anyone else notice a double standard in the coverage? When will Jon Stewart expose THIS hypocrisy in the media?
Excellent point here, for example where it says: “Just because something isn’t your fault or didn’t start with you, does that mean you can’t help find a solution? Does that mean you can’t try to love more than you already think you are? Doesn’t living the same life that’s comfortable for you, at the detriment of someone else, make your bliss-filled ignorance part of the problem?” I can’t help but notice that most of this article applies to ANY sort of social inequality, and not just about racial inequality or white privilege. This wisdom could apply to any group of… Read more »
All good points, especially about the questions you’ve quoted as they relate to any injustice. I believe there are differences in being a man and a woman, but there are also inequalities associated with both (women’s rights…and how the phrase is even seen, for example). The truth? There are so many areas in life when people are held down or treated unfairly, and until everyone is willing to acknowledge ALL of these injustices, I think we’ll face the same problems (from different angles). It’s time we tackle each of these, lifting up every person who faces any prejudice. I’ve learned… Read more »
(1) Stop giving police departments surplus military hardware
(2) Abolish the 25,000 UNCONSTITUTIONAL gun laws that left the 9-11 passengers helpless.
(3) Stop saying “check your privilege.” It’s bumper sticker philosophy that requires no actual thought. Worse yet, it offers no real solutions to problems.
(4) Study the Bill Of Rights and defend them. They are supposed to be the highest laws of our land.
I want to focus on three, mostly because the rest of your points are about laws and procedures that can be changed. What I think is so damning, so detrimental to this (and many) situations, is the mentality that doesn’t shift. #3 addresses just that. If society was more willing to look at their philosophies for the flaws inside of them, instead of holding them to their chests so tightly, we would be in a much better place to make decisions about 1,2 and 4. Instead, each side of every argument holds onto what they think they know and uses… Read more »
I am all for finding solutions. The point I was trying to make is that police, regardless of race or gender have become a class unto themselves. They do not exist to “serve and protect”, but simply to enforce the law, regardless of how unjust it may be. If you ever want to see the worst side of someone, give them a uniform and authority. Telling someone to “check their privilege” may feel good, but I would prefer actual solutions that accomplish something.