A Choking Baby and a Faking Father

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About Blake Friis

Blake is a writer and first-time father living in Dallas, TX. When not pushing a stroller aimlessly around Target or cowering in fear of a baby, he is documenting those misadventures at Pureed Green Beans and Whiskey. You can follow Blake on Twitter at @BlakeFriis.


  1. First time for me was at a birthday party and my toddler swallowed a grape. We always cut them–at my wife’s fearful insistence–but this one passed the goalie. Wife was at work. Still don’t know if she knows this one. Slow motion terror. The boy shot it like a meteor across the room, right over the birthday kid’s head. Still makes my heart drop. Thanks for jarring the memory.

  2. RIchard Aubrey says:

    My son got a piece of meat crossways in his throat, and was turning blue. He was in the later part of the high-chair period, whatever age that is.
    I gave him a calm, measured two-fingered poke under the sternum and that cleared everything up. I found the meat stuck to the wall across the kitchen. He wasn’t injured.
    My concern is that I might have injured him. I can fix choking. I can’t fix a perforated liver. Note to self, be cooler.

    • Hey, whatever works. I would love to be cooler, but that doesn’t seem to be in the cards when it comes to my son. In fact, I feel myself getting less cool with every passing day…

  3. RIchard Aubrey says:

    That’s nice, when it doesn’t count.
    When it counts, being robot-cold might be the difference. In my century, the last one, that was considered a virtue.

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