John White is becoming increasingly aware that only the pristine happy lives of parents make their way to social media. He thinks the public conversation should be more honest. He’s willing to go first.
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We’re all one big happy family. Life is always just peachy keen. Or so it would seem through the lens of social media. Social media has become our personal highlight reels of our lives where we share the top moments. You see social media is great at capturing moments. People post their absolute best photos, their vacations, new cars, when they win, their kids’ top achievements, and when they get new gadgets. In their blogs, they generally write about their top insights and their triumphs in business. But what we don’t see is the behind the scenes process that lead to that shareable moment. We don’t see what happened five minutes before or thereafter.
Only seeing the highlight reel gives people a narrow utopian view of other’s lives that can give a false impression that everything in other people’s lives is perfect, and it is only them who has problems. Whether we do so consciously or subconsciously there is a tendency for people to judge themselves based off what they see their peers posting on social media.
This can cause people to second guess themselves regarding their appearance, professional prowess, intelligence, marriages, and even their personal happiness. Studies show that this false view of the world can cause depression, anxiety, and feelings of self-doubt. This phenomenon is compounded by the tendency for people follow celebrities on social media who project fantasy lifestyles of glitz and glamour that are unattainable for most.
My life is indeed pretty great and I have a lot to be thankful for, including a beautiful wife, lovely home, and two adorable daughters. However, there is far more to my life than the highlight reel that I put out for public view on social media.
For this post, I thought I’d attempt to do something different and share a few recent moments in my life that didn’t make my social media highlight reel:
- I forgot my daughter’s water bottle at soccer practice the other day and had to run home to get it. She didn’t have anything to drink for the first 15-20 minutes of practice.
- While I love what I am doing professionally these days with this blogging and social media gig that I have started, opening a startup company has caused money to be tight. Daycare is I didn’t hit my revenue target last month, so we had to pull my daughter out of after school care. I am now the after school daycare.
- My two-year-old daughter is sick right now with a horrible cough and fever. She has been keeping us up at night. We brought her into the bed with us the other night. She rolls around a lot and I was the lucky recipient of a karate kick to the head at 2:30 am.
- My wife and I were supposed to go back to Mexico for our ten year anniversary last month. But because money is tight, instead, we settled for a babysitter and a dinner out at a Mexican restaurant in the town we live in.
- I went to the gym the other day and ended up working on my phone the entire time. Before I realized it and looked up, it was time to go.
- Last week, I forgot about garbage day. Huge husband failure. This is a problem when you still have a kid that is in diapers. #PU
- The other day, I had a weak moment, broke my diet, and pigged out on Halloween candy. I love Snickers.
- I’ve spent the majority of my career working for global tech companies in positions that included a cushy salary, benefits, 401K, etc. This whole being an entrepreneur thing has me scared to death.
- It’s been six years since my dad passed away, and I still haven’t gotten over it. His birthday is coming up. I miss him.
- My wife recently busted me waking up in the middle of the night to check my phone for updates on my blogs, client’s social media accounts, etc. She wasn’t amused.
I’m not advocating that you turn into a “Negative Nancy” on social media. Your followers won’t appreciate that. However, what I would like you to keep in mind is that not everything in life will make the highlight reel that is social media and that is OK. So the next time you are on social media and you are viewing the happy little photos of an old friend. Remember! What you didn’t see were the ones that turned out blurry, when nobody was smiling, the lighting was wrong, or when the weather sucked. Stay true to yourself. Doing so will empower you to enjoy the highlights in your life that much more.
Now, I will turn it over to you. Is there anything that happened in your life that didn’t make your social media highlight reel that you’d like to share? Come on, it is quite cathartic! You might just help someone who is having a bad day that is checking social media reading about everyone’s great day realize that they aren’t alone in having a bad day or even just a plain ole ordinary day.
Photo: Flickr/SEOPlanter