This mom wanted her daughters to understand the dynamics of their family and the character of their dad. She explains.
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Dear daughters,
As a stay-at-home Mom I want to take a moment to talk to you about your working-away-from-home Dad.
As you grow up you might initially see more of me than you do him, do not confuse this with one parent being more present than another. The reason that I am able to always be present physically is because your Dad is away working so that I can be. He is that kind of man. He doesn’t shake his head and question what I do at home with you girls all day, but rather supports me, backs me up, and works incredibly hard to guarantee that me being home is an option as long as you girls need it to be. Your Dad is the kind of man who believes in his family, puts them first, and values them above all else. If you ever forget this, look at his hands. They are worn, strong, colored from the weather and the sun. They are not the hands of self-provision, but of self-sacrifice. Your Dad’s hands are a labor of love. Hold them when he walks beside you, trust them when he lifts you high, rely on them to keep you grounded, and as you grow, don’t forget the man whose hands tell a story, whose hands have been of service to others, whose hands never let go of you.
You two won’t be our little girls forever, although we will forever claim you as such in our hearts. You will change, grow, and become women; your Dad won’t be ready for that. Be gentle with his heart, for he has never fallen for a woman like he free fell for the two of you. When your independence asserts itself, and your Dad’s gentle hands that once laid you down to sleep seem firm as he closes the door to that party you may want to attend, raise your gaze from his hands to his eyes and you will see his heart. His stance is strong, his will unbreakable, but his heart is ever so gentle and warm. His heart beats to the sound of his daughter’s footsteps running to greet him; it pulses with the knowledge that he is your provider and protector, above any other who may enter your life. Your Dad’s heart is not on his sleeve, but in his actions, so don’t forget that everything he does for you always comes from a place of love. He is that kind of man. The honest kind, the humble kind, the love you right kind.
Remember, as the two of you grow, so do the two of us, we too are getting older. Your Dad’s forehead will wrinkle along with the creases of his eyes, and bedded within each line is a memory. Your Dad’s wrinkles are his best features. They are created by years of laughter and award winning smiles, endless moments where humor washed away tears, fear, and doubt. Your Dad’s humor will lift you out of life’s hard spots and remind you to take life in, but never too seriously. His humor will keep you on your toes and make you roll your eyes; his humor will define your relationship, so laugh with him always (even when you are mad). Laugh at the way your hair has the classic “messy bun” look when Dad does it, laugh at the goofy sounds he makes when he reads you stories, laugh as you try on clothes with him when he takes you shopping. You have a Dad who does your hair and will let you paint his toes. He attends tea parties, and ensures that you have a pretty dress for the occasion. He sings the lyrics of your favorite songs as though the soundtrack is on repeat in his head, and he embraces the color pink right along with you. He is that kind of man.
As you climb on his back to play horse, or claim stake to a piggy back ride, as you sit on his shoulders to see the view from up high, appreciate the man who supports you. He may often have to leave, but he leaves home so we are guaranteed a home. He may miss dinner, but his hard work put food on our plates. His presence may be missed, but his love is always beating loud and clear for all of us to hear. So sweet girls, as we giggle in bed during morning wake-ups and dream big after bedtime stories, may we never forget to give thanks for the man who is securing our future.
From the three of us to you Dad —
Thank you for being that kind of man.
Photo: Flickr/makelessnoise
Hi Arakiba. I am not sure how to respond to such a negative outlook on this post, but I am sorry if this was your experience with a similar situation. Best.
“And when your dad decides he doesn’t want the responsibility of a family anymore, he will abandon us and get a girlfriend half his age with no kids, and we will drop into poverty because the job I’ll be forced to get (assuming I can find one after staying home for so many years) won’t be able to cover our living expenses.”
Great testament to you and your husband. Thank you
Thank you very much Tom!
You forgot one other kind of man he is. Lucky.
Thank you!