When Your Parent Dies

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About Joe Cardillo

Joe Cardillo is a media professional, DIY musician, and writer in Albuquerque, New Mexico. He believes the point of life is to connect to other people and acknowledge the absurdity/terror/joy of the human condition. You can find him on Twitter @joecardillo and read more of his writing on his blog, trialofthecentury.wordpress.com


  1. My Mom died of early onset dementia after 13 years of going downward with the disease. She was 63 when she died. I thought it would be easier after my mother died because I have been grieving a long time but it was not. The fact I did not need to go to the nursing home, etc, was hard to get over.

    I try to remember the good times. She was not mentally well even before the diagnosis but if I think back when I was little, I can remember good things.

    • I noticed the same thing with my mom. The grieving started well before it was apparent she was going to die, and living a life of grief became the norm….similar grief with an unhealthy marriage, now I’m recovering from both. You get attached to that, grief becomes part of your character and it takes a lot of patience to work out of that.

  2. I suppose I embrace this philosophy to a paralyzing fault sometimes, but the passage of time makes me ever more cognizant that there are a whole lot of negative things (slow lines, irritating people, the frustrations of life that we get all hung up about) that just are a waste of precious time. Thank you for sharing this.

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