Depression is a word many people throw around carelessly, but when used in its clinical sense it describes a debilitating, gut-wrenching illness.
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1. You can’t just “be happy” or “get over it”
Most people who suffer from depression have had someone say this to them at some point in time. But it doesn’t work like that. Depression is an illness—a person with depression can’t just snap their fingers and “get over it” in the same way that a person with cancer can’t just flick a switch and magically become healthy again.
2. It’s a real illness
Depression is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain—a deficiency of either serotonin, dopamine, adrenalin or noradrenalin. Just because it’s an invisible illness, doesn’t mean it’s not real.
3. People with depression are not attention seekers
There are exceptions to nearly every rule, but the vast majority of people with depression are most certainly not attention seekers. If they were, then why are they famous for saying “I’m fine” when they feel miserable? Why do they go to extreme lengths to hide their cuts if they self-harm? And why does suicide usually come as such a shock?
The truth is that most people with depression hide their pain—often out of fear of being judged or discriminated against.
4. Depression is very, very common
A lot of people think that depression is rare and that only freaks suffer from it, but the truth is that according to the World Health Organisation, depression afflicts 121 million people worldwide, and as many as 10% of adults in the Western World. You may think you don’t know anyone who’s suffering from depression, but odds are that you do.
5. Anyone can fall victim to depression
Depression is one of those illnesses that doesn’t discriminate. No matter how much money you make or what gender, age, sexuality, color or creed you are, you’re at risk of falling victim.
6. People with depression can still be very high functioning
Just because someone suffers from depression, it doesn’t mean that they’re incompetent or unable to function. History is filled with countless highly successful people who suffered from depression, including Sir Winston Churchill, J.K. Rowling, Gwyneth Paltrow, Stephen Fry, Angelina Jolie, Mark Twain, Demi Lovato, Abraham Lincoln, and Sir Isaac Newton.
7. People with depression are sick, not crazy
Mental illnesses are like physical illnesses—you treat them and get better. A person with a mental illness is no more crazy than a person with a physical illness.
8. If someone with depression has a “good day,” it doesn’t mean that they no longer have depression
People with depression can have “good” days where they don’t feel depressed—indeed, they can have days where they even feel happy. But it’s a mistake to assume that just because they feel good one day, that they’re no longer sick and therefore should feel good every day. Depression just doesn’t work like that.
9. People with depression are not necessarily “negative” or “ungrateful”
Just because a person suffers from depression, it doesn’t mean that they’re a negative or an ungrateful person. Again, depression is an illness, and it can happen to anyone—positive and grateful people included.
10. Suffering from depression is much, much more than having a bad day or feeling ephemerally sad
A bad day is just that—a bad day—and sadness is a fleeting emotion. Clinical depression on the other hand can make you feel utterly miserable—not for just one day, but for weeks, months, or even years on end. It can make you feel completely worthless. It can make you feel exhausted. It can make you hate yourself. It can make you self-harm. And worst of all, it can make you feel suicidal and drive you to carry out those thoughts. Depression is a word many people throw around carelessly (“I have to go to work on Monday, that is so depressing”), but when used in its clinical sense, it describes a debilitating, gut-wrenching illness.
How about you? What are some things you wish people knew about depression?
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Photo: Brian/Flickr
If you enjoyed reading this post, I encourage you to download a FREE copy of my memoir here. Recounting my struggle and eventual triumph over depression, I wrote it so that sufferers of the illness could realise they are not alone – that there are other people out there who have gone through the same excruciating misery, and who have made it through to the other side. I also wrote it so that I could impart the lessons I learned on the long, rocky, winding road that eventually led to recovery – so that people could learn from my mistakes as well as my victories – particularly with regards to relationships; substance abuse; choosing a fulfilling career path; seeking professional help; and perhaps most importantly, having a healthy and positive attitude towards depression that enables recovery. Multiple-bestselling author Nick Bleszynski has described it as “beautifully written, powerful, heartfelt, insightful and inspiring … a testament to hope.”
People still tell you to pull yourself together and get over it. Actually, it was a terrible childbirth, and the baby just turned 29.
Clearing up some of these negative stereotypes would certainly make it easier for us to live and get well. So many people don’t fully understand depression and that is the hardest part some days.
This is amazing. There was so many times that I simply wished that people UNDERSTOOD me when I was suffering from depression. I started to go insane because I was trying to express myself, people would act like it wasn’t real, and I would disassociate from my own depression. #9 and #10 are extremely important. There is too much of an obsession with people thinking “You must be positive all the time.” This makes it so that depression sufferers cannot express themselves. It is one thing to complain that the air conditioner is 72 degrees when you want it to… Read more »
hey enjoyed this have been suffering from depression for a few years now and slowly getting over it was hard over the winter months (i live in Canada by the way) even tho i do enjoy snowboarding i am much happier in summer partly because of the sun which is very good for helping reduce depression but also i am allot more active witch can also help with getting your mind off of negativity in your life now to all the people thinking about suicide its not going to help yes i know how this world can feel torturous but… Read more »
Vitamin d. Seriously. Look into depression relation to vit d deficiency.
That women can have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder from events such as a bad childbirth. On top of Post Partum Depression, in which many people are battling hormones, the event has flashbacks of the terrible moments. People still tell you to pull yourself together and get over it. Actually, it was a terrible childbirth, and the baby just turned 29.
My partner suffers from depression he says its my fault because im always on at him . He also gets annoyed when I try and defend myself because of the horrible things he says to me it’s ok for him to take it out on me in very hurtful ways .in some ways he uses it as a reason as to why he shouldn’t help or be with his family . I understand depression is a terrible illness .it’s also not easy to feel like you need to walk on eggshells all the time and be scared of what might… Read more »
@try to help
That’s being abusive. Without knowing your story depression DOES NOT give anyone the right to be abusive nor is it an excuse.
From what I can tell you both need assistance – you for enforcing your own boundaries – It is not ok to tell you how you feel, that you’re responsible for his feelings or actions or for him to say horrible things to you. He needs help to stop being depressed, take responsibility for his actions and his life and probably for a lot of other things.
I welcome this article and certainly relate to it. A couple of points: (1) Anyone doubting that depression—in its severe form—can be utterly debilitating would find William Styron’s short book, Darkness visible, about his own episode of severe depression very enlightening. (2) I think it is tendentious to say that depression is “caused” by a “chemical imbalance in the brain”. Surely, it is more accurate to say that depression is an affective reflection of a chemical imbalance. What causes the chemical imbalance, in many cases, is likely to be a “chemical” response to a life experience: in other words, emotions… Read more »
I completely agree with you. Most of my therapists have told me that my clinical depression stems from years of emotional and physical abuse, especially as a child and teenager, and not from a chemical imbalance I was born with. Thus, I’ve learned to cope with my illness without medication.
#5: So true…so true… Out of full time work…and working sporadically…left me with a lot of time…I was so used to being so busy and important and talking to 3-4 people all at the same time…plus facing a cancer diagnosis made me go out of my head….what kept me within my senses was having a routine everyday and forcing myself to go to the gym and working out and writing out daily goals….even if I did not accomplish much that day, it was good to do something….I forced myself to sign up for weird courses (learning Japanese!) and going to… Read more »