Who ever said that changing the world is a bad thing?
We have a big mission. Call us soulful entrepreneurs, lightworkers, world-changers, innovators, love warriors, soldiers of light—we’ve got a big mission. We’re changing lives. We’re going against the grain. We’re birthing new wisdom into the world that has never existed before. We’re here to benefit the world.
And, all that said, there’s just one term—one pervasive term across the entire space—that I just don’t resonate with at all: “Being of service.”
And I have to blush because I know it’s so widely used. And widely loved. But—truth be told—it’s just not for me. Because, yes, we are here to change the world. Yes, we are here to do big, big stuff. We’re helping people. We’re transforming lives.
But I’m not doing any of that for anyone else—at least not really. I’m doing it for myself. I’m changing the world for selfish reasons. Because it’s an inner call, a deep desire, that I can’t ignore. It just works out that it helps other people in the process.
The very first question I ask anyone in a Sacred Branding session is, “What do you want to heal in yourself through your business? Like why are you in business in the first place? Are you trying to feel more connected or more seen? What’s up there?”
And the answers I get are almost always outward facing at first. “Well, I feel called to help others,” or, “I help people connect to their inner light.”
And that’s great. That’s beautiful. I want to honor that fully.
But what do you get out of helping others or helping people connect to their inner light? Does it make you feel needed? Worthy? Powerful? Seen? Heard? Connected?
And people are always taken aback for a moment. Like I’m accusing them of some self-centered desire to change the world. Like it’s all about them.
And, truthfully, it is. It’s all about you. It’s all, all about you. You just have to own it.
I never want to be the guy who is always looking for how I can serve other people. I never want to be the guy who is constantly thinking how I can improve my writing or my coaching or my intuition for others. Because that’s the fastest way I know to under-receiving and burnout.
It’s actually the belief system that I’m trying to unravel. The same one that has me feeling guilty if I take a day off of writing because I don’t feel like it. Or the one that pushes me to get that project done by the deadline because I told my crowd I would.
But the truth is—I’m not doing it for them. I’m doing it for me. I’m doing it because I love to shine my light in a big way. It makes me feel seen and successful and alive and free. It makes me feel meaningful and purposeful to help others. It makes me feel vulnerable to put myself out there so openly.
I’m changing the world for selfish reasons. Because, if I didn’t truly love what I did every moment of every day, I’d be giving my power to other people. And not taking it for myself.
And that’s why I don’t resonate with the term “being of service.” Because—if you’re living out your purpose and answering your Soul’s call, of course you’re of service. Every moment of every day. You’re doing exactly what you came here to do. But you’re doing it for yourself. As part of the bigger plan. And not just what you think you should do to help others.
It’s about standing in your own power, honoring what feels right to you, and loving the life you have. Because connecting with your own light and shining it in that big of a way is the greatest service you can ever offer to the Universe. We all desperately need that from you.
But don’t do it for us. Do it for you. Because, when you do that, you’re really connecting to what’s right for you. And what’s right for the entire Universe.
I live for the days when I’m bored on the couch, watching TV, and I spring up and think, “Wouldn’t it be so fun right now to just create a new offering?” And then I get started on it.
Not because I seek out where I can be of more service. And not because I’m somehow a disempowered servant of the light. But because I just like to have fun. And do what feels good to me. And help those that it excites me to help. On my own terms. When I feel like it. And acknowledging the inherent connection that I have with those whom I resonate with and who resonate with me. Healing myself is healing my audience. And healing my audience is healing myself. And that’s why I do it. For selfish reasons. Because it’s really about standing in my own power and living the best life I could possibly imagine. The one that makes me undeniably happy.
Because martyrdom isn’t about empowerment. It’s about giving your power away. And nobody’s asking any of us to work ourselves to the bone, or give and give until we have nothing left, or sacrifice our personal lives for someone else’s happiness. That’s not world-changing—that’s disempowering. And a one-way ticket to burnout.
And you deserve better.
You deserve to live the life you’ve always wanted. The one that is so over-the-top, outrageously, blissfully happy. The one where you get to do whatever you want. You get to indulge in your deepest desires. You get to be the person you’re meant to be—effortlessly.
And, like magic, that’s what changes the world.
When you are yourself and do what you want, you are always being of service.
But it’s you being yourself that we really need. It’s you that we’ve always needed.
Originally published at bostonwellnesscoach.com.
Photo: Leo Grübler/Flickr