Crossing Lines: A Transman’s Privilege

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About Anthony Doubek

Anthony Doubek is a trans-gentleman looking to make a difference in this world. He writes, "I was born female but that does not make me any less of a man. I believe that everyone has the right to self-determination and that no one has the right to tell another person what they are or aren’t. I believe in Universal Human Rights and in a higher power that is not full of wrath and rules but just pure creative and loving energy." Tony blogs at Follow him on Twitter @boxersnbinders


  1. You write about your new-found privilege, but don’t give any examples.

    The guys in the club were other guys; it sounds like your boss knew that you were trans-gender; and the poem is a race issue.

    The hugging isn’t really a privilege. Black men have simply learned not to go and hug white women that they don’t know very well, whereas if a white man is friendly to a black man then hugging is appropriate.

    • I should change appropriate to “likely to be well received.” It is appropriate for black men to hug anyone who wants to be hugged.

    • Hi Mike,
      I was trying to keep the post brief, but I will list a few examples of privilege that I had before being visibly male. As a visibly queer female I would often be harassed verbally when alone and with a girl. I would be given strange looks when I went to non-queer establishments and dealt with a lot of homophobic language and comments (also something I faced in bathrooms). As a man I do not face anything like this. I am allowed to walk around with a girl unnoticed and am not discriminated against in public spaces.

      I am interning at the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, so my boss does know I am transgender and we just had a conversation about racism that afternoon and about white privilege and how some men (not all) are not always aware of it.

      With regards to the poem and the hugs, I was not afraid of being hugged, I am a big hugger and always welcome a friendly embrace. I was actually nervous because I had grown up with the stereotype that people of color are more homophobic (something that was proven wrong by Injustice at Every Turn: The National Transgender Discrimination Survey). The poem was about being transgender and I was nervous reading it in a crowd that was not predominantly queer where most of the people there were people of color. My perceived gender and the hugging and handshaking afterwards had very little to do with each other. The reason I included that in there was to show the moment where the institutionalized racism I was struggling against and the stereotypes that were stuck in my head were debunked.

      I hope I addressed your concerns. Next time I write something like this I will try to include more details to avoid confusion.

      Stay excellent

      • That makes sense. When I read the article I was expecting a comparison of your experiences presenting male vs presenting female. Rather than presenting trans vs presenting male.

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