Studying personal development many times, I encountered the advice “Believe in yourself.” This advice was totally not applicable in my case and here’s why.
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It was said in many different ways- “if you don’t, then who will?”, “there is no self-esteem without it”- but the core was the same.
This advice was totally not applicable in my case. How could I believe in myself as a writer when I had no experience nor writing education? How could I believe in myself as an entrepreneur, when my only attempt to start a business failed when I was 17?
How could I believe in myself as a person, when I knew myself all too well? How do you believe in failure? In a sinner? In a perjurer? In a dishonest, lazy, disgusting and self-indulging creature? That’s impossible.
It’s not necessary. The raw material of accomplishment is action.
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I know I’m not the only one out there with low self-esteem and a head full of negative self-talk. Most men think that way about themselves, and sadly, our thoughts are based on reality. Did you know that people with depression have a more accurate self-image, reflecting reality better, than mentally healthy people? Believing in yourself is a tricky business, and not many can pull that off. Thus, they can’t even start with personal development.
Don’t believe in yourself
It’s not necessary. The raw material of accomplishment is action. You don’t have to believe in yourself to achieve. You just need to act. And you can find sources of belief, other than yourself.
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1. Others’ vision of yourself. Bob Proctor was working a manual job earning about $4,000 a year when he met his mentor. Like most of us, he had no foundations to believe in himself. He wasn’t talented or educated. He was deep in debt. He started acting differently because of his mentor’s belief in him. He couldn’t comprehend his potential with his mind. But his mentor’s faith in him was unwavering. Bob Proctor put his trust in another man’s opinion of him. A year later, he became the owner of an international business earning $100,000.
2. Believe in the cause. I’ve recently finished reading an autobiography of Leon Trotsky. Being born under the communist rule, I’d first of all point out that Trotsky’s cause was a bankrupted idea. It led to an incredible death toll, cruelty and degradation of cultural life in many nations.
Nevertheless, Trotsky believed in the idea of world revolution. It was his driving force. He did some extraordinary deeds as a leader of the Russian revolution and the commander of the Red Army. He put his faith in the wrong idea, and he wasn’t a role model for kids, but he achieved a lot in his life.
3. Believe in God’s help. Human belief is a powerful force. You don’t have to be a Christian to believe in spiritual support. Alexander the Great believed he was the son of Zeus, thus he had superhuman abilities. Napoleon believed that Destiny was on his side. John D. Rockefeller was convinced that he was anointed by God to reach unimaginable highs of riches in this world. If anything, those three examples demonstrate how far an average man can go when he puts his faith in something greater than himself.
My favorite story of a man who believed in God’s Providence is the story of Blessed John Beyzym. He was a Jesuit missionary who worked among the lepers in Madagascar. In accordance with Catholic spirituality, he considered himself as the last among people. I read his letters; he often referred to himself as ‘a bandit’ or ‘thug.’
Once when he realized how pitiful the condition of his lepers were, he began to dream of building a hospital for them.
He tirelessly worked on funding and building his dream hospital.
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They lived in shoddy and dirty huts. He had no resources. The Order sent him to help lepers with spiritual struggles and didn’t channel any physical resources to them. Blessed John Beyzym couldn’t even feed his people, and at the beginning he had to witness how a few of them starved. He was as poor as they were. All he had was his person… and his faith.
He believed he was sent to Madagascar by the Holy Mary to improve lepers’ existence. He tirelessly worked on funding and building his dream hospital. People were calling him crazy. How could he build a modern hospital in the African wilderness having nothing? Blessed John was indifferent to naysayers. In 1911, one year before his death, the hospital was ready, and the first lepers were admitted.
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Find something greater than you to believe. As the stories I mentioned aptly demonstrate, you don’t have to believe in yourself to progress. Choose the belief you can bet your life on and act in accordance with it. The results will come, and they may be beyond your wildest dreams.
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Photo: Flickr/ Lucia Castillo
Nice article Michal – but I think the premise of “Believe in yourself” that the personal development gurus promote is more to do with you believing in your (as yet) untapped ability, as opposed to your experience (or non-experience as you mention)
The idea I think is that we all have the ability to be and to achieve whatever it is we want in life – if we believe in ourselves, regardless of any previous experience.