Nathan Friedkin explains why he believes yoga, combined with sports training, may be the key to ending violence among young athletes.
My father had been working long hours for years as a staff pediatrician in a county hospital when by chance he came across an ad for a position in a small private pediatrics medical group some 30 miles away. He applied, was hired, and his long hours at work became longer with a new commute. He just wasn’t around very often, and when he was – he was tired. In the next few years, the practice exploded and we moved from our middle class town into a upper class neighborhood. After spending 4 years in a private Jewish day school, I was tossed into an Aryan jungle – undersized, uncoordinated and unprepared for the stinging discovery that I had no ability to play sports on the playground with the kids who were my friends in the classroom. While all my new friends seemingly had fathers who had taught them the basics of run, catch, throw, it dawned on me that my father had never mentioned sports nor ever thrown a ball with me. So I was that kid on the schoolyard in 4th grade, who no one wanted on their team. The searing taunts of “You take him. No, you take him!” became a painful ritual that year.
I wanted to be accepted as one of the guys who was good as sports. To hold my head high as I walked onto a field. Instead I was the short, uncoordinated, skinny red-head from private Jewish day school with two left feet, who nobody wanted on their team. I promised myself that if I had sons, I would make sure they would never have to suffer the internal humiliation of being picked last.
Years later, I had two sons. And I relished the opportunity to teach them how to throw and catch, how to be a leader and to nurture a true love of sports and competition. I would coach many of their teams, as working with kids was one of my lifelong core competencies. And I managed to be active in their sports life but not overbearing. More than anything, I wanted them to grow up experiencing their childhood with the confidence in themselves and joy on the playing field that I never had.
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In a general sense, that’s how my new enterprise, Maximum Performance Yoga® came about. Through my own organic commitment to helping kids feel good about themselves, and knowing the incredible benefits of yoga firsthand through my own practice.
But it also goes beyond that.
I used to coach my sons in youth football leagues where players would came from violent and poverty-stricken neighborhoods. But when those same kids were out on the field, they’d forget all about their imprisoned father, their alcoholic mother, the gunshots outside their door. When they were out on the field, they embraced brotherhood, teamwork, and a common goal.
I became a friend and father figure to a lot of these boys. They’d spend weekends with my sons, eating pizza dinners and shooting hoops until the sun went down. That was 6 or 7 years ago. I no longer coach, but we’ve continued these relationships.
The reason yoga training is an incredible way to manage anger, walk away from conflict, and live a good life is because it focuses on the breath. If you can gain control of your breath, you can gain control of your choices.
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One of them visited last weekend and I was stunned to see him wearing an ankle monitor because he got into a fight. Why the fight? He was punched in the back of the head for walking away from one. He spent four nights in juvenile hall for defending himself. And when his ankle monitor wasn’t charged properly, he was taken back into custody for another two weeks. Nobody gives ‘wrong side of the tracks’ kids a second chance. Or even a first. I spent time with the public defender helping her build a case for his release and after appearing in court twice, he was set free.
The next week, another friend from our football days came over. Same age, same team. And I’ll be damned if he didn’t have an ankle monitor on, too. He spent five nights in jail for fighting. And I was gutted.
Later, upon reflection – I realized that in essence, the way that anger and reactivity can doom these young men with so much potential, and the way in which yoga can help them manage that anger, may very well be what primarily fuels my swim upstream against convention and stigma. The reason yoga training is an incredible way to manage anger, walk away from conflict, and live a good life is because it focuses on the breath.
Athletes turning to yoga for an edge in performance and injury prevention is also not a secret anymore. From Lebron James to Hope Solo to the Seattle Seahawks – yoga is being used for million dollar bodies all the time.
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If you can gain control of your breath, you can gain control of your choices. Athletes turning to yoga for an edge in performance and injury prevention is also not a secret anymore. From Lebron James to Hope Solo to the Seattle Seahawks – yoga is being used for million dollar bodies all the time. I simply decided that it should be used for everybody.
But the delivery and messaging needed to change. For athletic kids to buy in, we’d have to do more science than Sanskrit, and more kinesiology than Kumbayah. Because of the stigma of yoga being for girls, I had to make it fun and challenging. So I got together with some other yoga and fitness teachers, we hashed out and tested an approach towards curriculum and Maximum Performance Yoga® was born.
It’s time to give kids all over the nation the benefits of our specialized yoga training. I can’t make any lasting impact by having one or two at-risk kids over to my house intermittently and preaching to them about staying out of trouble. So MPY has a teacher training program, where our teachers will fan out and provide young athletes (at-risk or not) everywhere with the tools so that they can to do it for themselves. But they don’t have to do it by themselves.
And while there’s still probably no way you’re going to get a high school football or basketball team into a traditional studio, if you bring it to their fields, courts, gyms, and pools, and you make it high energy and fun, they’re going to love doing yoga. Because everyone feels good doing yoga. That’s been going on for tens of thousands of years. And before you know it, we’ve ninja’d the benefits of yoga into workouts that keep these players flexible, balanced, injury-free and with a little bit of luck, jail-free too.
There are several ways you can follow MPY.
Check out our website at www.maxperformanceyoga.com
Follow us: www.facebook.com/maxperformanceyoga or www.twitter.com/maxperformyoga
Contact: Nathan Friedkin
[email protected]
Emeryville, California
Photo courtesy of author
LMAO! “Tossed into an Aryan Jungle”? For real? Is this guy Vanilla Ice? “I was pers-a-cuted in da jungles of Piedmont and OHppressed by Ayrans!” Come on, there were many Jewish kids when he was coming up in Piedmont (where he moved to according to another bio). Perhaps arriving later in elementary school made him feel awkward around the kids who had been their since birth but come on! Many white non -Jewish kids can’t pay sports as well. As for overlying his message here about yoga and non-violence, it 100% beautiful and sincere. What a wonderful, selfless person to… Read more »
This
wow, what a great story and project. I practice yoga breathing and meditation with The Art of Living, which has youth programs and a special course for veterans. They also respond to disaster. Maybe you could do some good work in partnership, there are lots of folks involved in the SF bay area. Good luck!
http://www.artofliving.org
This article is amazing. I teach yoga, and I used to work with kids, and I think the marriage of the two is what gives me hope for a more peaceful, compassionate, and empathetic future. I’ve seen (and personally felt) the difference that yoga can make in someone’s lives. The more we’re able to deliver yoga to those in need, the more, like Nathan said, we can erase a history of violence, and build a promising new generation.