The best lovers are those who understand that sex is all about the other person and the moment.
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Every man wants to believe that he is a great lover. He wants to be the best lover his partner ever had; he never wants to think that somebody was better than him at pleasing his woman. This attitude is pleasant to have when a man is doing everything to please his partner. It cannot come from a man whose sole focus during intimacy is to satisfy himself.
When a man is given the opportunity to be someone’s lover, he should take pride in the role.
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The best lovers are those who feel that sex is all about the woman. The best words I ever heard were “I am pleased by pleasing you.” Sometimes men can be selfish creatures who only do things for reciprocation. In dealing with female clients, I hear all the time that men only do things because they want something in return.
When a man is given the opportunity to be someone’s lover, he should take pride in the role and work diligently at getting the task accomplished. Women need to know that you are working towards pleasing them and you are not just trying to satisfy yourself. Women will know the difference between being into her vs. being there solely for yourself. I will share with you five things guys need to know to be her best lover ever
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1. Ask her what she likes. Do not be afraid to ask her what exactly she wants. No woman is going to jump out of the bed and assume that you don’t know what you are doing because you ask her what she likes and how she likes it. You will probably gain more respect from her because you took the time to ask her what she enjoyed. It shows that you care about pleasing her and will make her more willing to participate. People tend to know what pleases them and usually don’t have a problem with sharing with their lovers what it takes to satisfy them. Being a great lover is about communication.
2. Foreplay starts verbally and escalates. The seduction begins with simple compliments. Every woman wants to know that you noticed the extra time and effort she put into getting pretty for you are appreciated. Tell her how beautiful she looks, how good she smells, how flawless her makeup is, how well her dress accentuates her curves. Make her feel appreciated for all the time she spent making herself beautiful for you. Giving her compliments and paying attention to her helps ease the tension and makes her more comfortable.
3. Stop being selfish. Women are naturally inclined to want to please their lovers. That’s why there are fellatio classes, lingerie, edible underwear, and the list goes on of tools women have to please men. On the contrary, what do the men have besides porn movies that focus heavily on male satisfaction, and give incorrect information into female gratification.
Men have to begin to adapt the same mental process of women when it comes to intimacy; they need to enter the act with the idea of doing whatever it takes to make sure their partners are pleased. Once her pleasure is the primary focus, the whole outcome of the intimacy will be more rewarding because you are focused on pleasing her and vice versa.
4. Pay attention to more than her vagina and breasts. Engaging in intercourse has to be more than oral sex and penetration. On the contrary, when speaking to female clients, I always hear that men only touch two parts of their bodies during sex. Lack of attention to her body is totally unacceptable if your goal is to be her best lover.
An expert pleaser pays attention to the entire body and knows there are so many erogenous zones on a woman’s body if one stops and take the time actually to explore and find all of the pleasure zones of his woman. Her back needs to be kissed, her navel and stomach need to be caressed, use the tops of your fingernails to rub over arms and thighs gently, kiss her thighs, legs and feet, her body is there to be pleased, and it is your duty as her selected lover to please.
They want to be pleased and want their men to genuinely take an interest in pleasing them.
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5. Get a book on female anatomy. Many men will never purchase a book or how-to guide when it comes to satisfying a woman because they all think they have what it takes. Arrogance has to be the biggest error on the part of men. Books contain information, and sometimes knowledge of individual subjects you never knew existed. A book can take your love making game to new heights. Every man is not a sex expert, but he can benefit from the knowledge of an expert if he just takes the time to study and learn new tricks for pleasing his woman.
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Women enjoy sex just as much as men. They want to be pleased and want their men to genuinely take an interest in pleasing them. Sex should never be one sided where one partner is the receiver, and one is the giver. It should be a shared pleasurable experience for both, where both partners want and work hard to please the other. Mutual satisfaction should always be the goal when engaging in intimacy. The more one learns their partner; the more pride they will take in satisfying them, it becomes fun when you learn what they need, pleasing them becomes easier and more rewarding for you.
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Photo: Flickr/ chiaralily
awesome how on this “pro-men” site women are just free to insult men and the mods don’t care
All in all good advice, but I’m sorry I have to call bullshit on the idea that women are “naturally inclined” to want to please men. Women are just as capable of being selfish, and terrible lovers as men are. I suspect you never hear about it because you either don’t ask men at all (which is what I bet) or because most men are conditioned to feel lucky to be getting intimacy with women at all, that even bad sex is good sex.
But where exactly are these fellatio “classes”? I’m asking for… Science.
“Sometimes men can be selfish creatures who only do things for reciprocation. In dealing with female clients, I hear all the time that men only do things because they want something in return.” Wow!! You know this deeply offends me…But, I am big boy so I can handle it. Women have always used sex as power and influence over men. Is it not women who made sex transactional to begin with? Who are 95% of prostitutes on the planet? You make it sound like women are innocent little angels out here who just give up pussy for nothing in return.… Read more »
Your extra long and super asinine comment made my day. I’m glad I’m married to my husband and not someone like you. You are truly revolting 😀
well that was a well thought out and intelligent response and definitely not a load of bullshit and personal insults. Since that is the level of discourse the mods here apparently approve of, allow me to invite you to kindly screwv off, you harpy
@8ball,
Thanks!!
Yes, this is one of the truly annoying things about GMP…..moderators are inconsistent.
You super short and ignorant comment made my day also! I pray I never run into such an ignorant woman as yourself. You are truly pathetic!!!
Cheers!
Jules
I could not believe my own eyes when I read this sentence .
” who are 95% percent of the prostiutes on this planet?”
I have up until know seen you as an intelligent , well educated man with good analytic abilities .
But this statement , used in this discussion we have here makes me upset.
I leave this debate.
Contempt for women will not get you what you want the most Jules.
Hi Silke! Glad to hear from you.. “” who are 95% percent of the prostiutes on this planet?” I think you misread my comment. Every study I have seen about prostitution says 90-95% are women. Obviously, most of them are not so by choice. Is this not accurate? I am not saying or suggesting that 95% of women are prostitutes. That would be ludicrous. Here in the US, prostitution is only legal in certain places (though not many). In the State of Nevada, that is the case. A big brothel hired a male prostitute for women. He quit because he… Read more »