My friend, my support system, my number one fan, my mother and my father, I love you for all that you have done.
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For this Father’s day, I would like to pay tribute to the single fathers that are fulfilling their parental duties and to the single mothers that pose as both parents within their family.
I constantly hate having to explain why I give my mother gifts for both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. To me, it should be acceptable, not questionable.
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Coming from a single parent family myself where I was raised by my mother was quite an interesting, and yet humbling, upbringing. Not a day goes by where these individuals don’t deserve all the recognition in the world for everything they do to provide for their families. These individuals have to fight so many battles day to day just because they’re in the parenting business by themselves. From my perspective, I don’t know how single parents do what they. For example, as a male who was raised by a single parent, it was sometimes hard for me to understand why my mother did not have the answer for certain things just because of the fact that there were things she could not and did not want to discuss with me just because it would have been better suited coming from a male.
I constantly hate having to explain why I give my mother gifts for both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. To me, it should be acceptable, not questionable. To all the single parents out there, your work, craft, and profession is appreciated in the world and because of everything you do to provide for your family, I personally thank you for the impact you are making in your child’s life.
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I would like to share key principles with you that I obtained during my childhood at the age of 12 and have been adamant about carrying out these principles in my life to the present day:
Be grateful
For those of you that wonder why you don’t have two parents in your household, as much as it is a question you may never obtain a reasonable answer to, just be grateful for having a parent. For some of us, one parent is all we have and that one parent deserves as much love from us as if we were to love two parents. I strongly believe this because when I was younger, I was always confused and filled with so much hatred when it came to discussing matters about my father. Luckily enough, I was able to forgive my father, appreciate my mother, and be grateful for the privilege of having someone to call my parent just because I knew there were children that may not be able to do the same.
Don’t take your parent for granted
As their child, it is your duty to grow and mature yourself so that when it is your turn to take care of them, you’ll be ready.
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My mother has always asked me a difficult question: “Kevin, what are you going to do when I’m gone?” To this day, as much as I would like to say that I have life figured out, I am scared of the day of when I’ll have to face a reality without my mother. I had a childhood, but it ended early due to how I had to grow up at the age of twelve to support my mother. My mother took care of me, clothed me, fed me, and put a roof over my head. There will come a time when she will grow old and weary and will depend on me to treat her with the same amount of care. I know quite a few people who had rough upbringings within a single-parent household. To those of you who can relate, don’t forget to be thankful for what your parent was able to give because it was probably all they had. As their child, it is your duty to grow and mature yourself so that when it is your turn to take care of them, you’ll be ready.
Embrace love
There are so many people I have seen take their parent for granted and it frustrates the hell out of me. When I was younger, there would be times I would watch my mother and my grandmother not speak to each other for long periods of time. When my grandmother passed away, my mother told me that no matter how much we fight, argue, or bicker, we must never forget how much we love each other and that nothing else matters most besides the fact that we are family. There’s a song that I heard on television before that said in the lyrics, “Let your love for your mother be as bright as the sun, love your mother because you only get one.” These simple words are contributing factors as to how I realized that by embracing my mother’s love, it would serve as a major benefit to our relationship as mother and son.
This also taught me that if you do have a positive relationship, do whatever you can to maintain it. Tomorrow is not promised to us and you never know when the time will come for you to say those three words to your parent before it is their time to pass away. Cars, money, houses, and birthday dinners cannot overpower the embrace of one statement: I love you.
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To my mother, Sharon Wright, I love you and I truly appreciate everything you have done for me. You spent 22 years of your life making me the man I am today and I can’t thank you enough. When I have a family, I can’t wait to share with them what you shared with me in life. My friend, my support system, my number one fan, my mother and my father, I love you for all that you have done. Each day that you wake up gives me a chance to enjoy the time I have with you on this Earth, which is something that I will never take for granted. You’re one of the hardest working women I know and a fine example of what it takes to make it in life. Thank you for encouraging me to stay humble, stay focused, and above all, stay on track to fulfill my purpose in life. Happy Father’s Day, Mom.
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Image credit: Keoni Cabral/flickr
I wonder ow many “feminist sites” publish articles to “dads” on mother’s day? Yes, there are plenty of examples where kids of single mom’s have done well but there are far more examples of how poorly kids have done without dads. You put a frog in hot water and it will jump out. You put a frog in cool water and gradually turn up the heat, it will boil and die. We are a society where things have happen so gradually that single motherhood has become okay, the norm with little to no accountability for the negative affects on kids.… Read more »
Of course this is published on fathers day………….’cause us dads just need another reminder
Yeah it never ceases to amaze me to what extent people will go to, to praise single mothers and bash absent fathers – even if they are absent against their will. Its a stone-able offence to ask single mothers about their responsibility/accountability in choosing to be a parent. With women initiating 70% of divorces, fathers getting custody only 15% of the time, and 1in3 women have children outside of a relationship, can we not ever ask these women to be more responsible with their decisions? With so many birth control methods up to and including abortion and even adoption there… Read more »