Nothing gained by seeking the approval of others is worth having. Be open, honest, and transparent and people will like you for you and everything else will take care of itself.
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“Don’t quit your day job,” they all said.
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Platoon! Dismissed! I will never forget these words. Standing at attention in our dress blues on that hot California parade deck, we took two steps back, about faced and yelled our final “Ooh-rah”! Graduating from Marine Corps boot camp was one of the proudest moments of my life.
Two things I learned on that journey towards manhood was the privilege to serve God and country, and the responsibility to provide for my family.
From an early age, I learned that a young man should put in a good day’s work and put food on the table. Failure was not an option. My father was the perfect example. I was never shown otherwise.
“Don’t quit your day job,” they all said. I struggled with these words for years before taking the leap into entrepreneurship. I had money set aside beforehand; so I just knew everything would be okay.
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When I left my job, I felt a sense of accomplishment by telling everyone around me that I had left my job and started my own business. I wanted other people to think highly of me; even after the troubles began. My pride had reached an all-time high, and there was no turning back. However, the worst days were just around the corner.
Months of struggle ensued. Hardship fell upon us, and I became desperate. It was difficult for me to admit that I was failing. I tried to hide the reality of our situation from my wife. That was just the beginning.
I begin selling and pawning items of value so that she wouldn’t notice that I was late paying bills. I got a title loan on our vehicle. I scrapped and hustled so that I wouldn’t have to admit to everyone that I no longer could afford our lifestyle. I put up a facade with my friends and family–even my parents.
The reality hit me like a ton of bricks. For the first time in twenty years, I found myself waiting for my wife’s paycheck to hit while floating checks on our bank account so that we could get groceries. I had reached an all-time low.
I hate to admit it, but I blamed all of our problems on everything and everyone else. It wasn’t until I was confronted by a close family member about my pride issue that I began to realize that “I” was the problem.
My pride would not allow me to be transparent with others. My pride would not allow me to be honest with myself. My father once told me that it takes more of a man to swallow his pride and admit the truth than to run from it. My pride had literally stripped away my manhood and sense of self-worth.
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Most importantly, I can look in the mirror and be proud of the man that I am.
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Since that time, I’ve stopped hiding from the reality of our struggles. Once I was open and transparent with others, things began to change for the better. I stopped making excuses. I gained my self-respect back. I no longer felt like I had to portray a pseudo-successful image to be accepted by others.
As a result, I’ve been able to grow revenue in my business well into five figures within less than a year. I have additional opportunities opening up regularly. Most importantly, I can look in the mirror and be proud of the man that I am.
If you’re struggling with pride or if you are hiding who you are, thinking that others may not accept you for it, then ask yourself, why?
Nothing gained by seeking the approval of others is worth having. Just be open, honest, and transparent and people will like you for you and everything else will take care of itself.
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Photo: Flickr/ Adam Moralee