Dressed in Yoga Pants, he’s experiencing what it feels to have guys staring at his butt.
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YouTube user FouseyTube says: “A friend of mine told me recently that I had no idea how hard it was to be a girl. Because when she wears leggings, everybody stares at her butt. So today, I’m gonna find out exactly how hard it is”.
And there he goes. In a parking lot, he’s pretending to look for stuff in his car, and letting the approaching men have a sight of his yoga pants. Not only does Mr. FouseyTube discover how it feels, but he chooses to confront the men who stare at him in a funny and relaxed way. The lesson is good for them. It is good for us as well. As a reminder that nothing’s innocent in the way we look at women.
Anyone, and I mean ANYONE, who wears transparent leggings without something covering their ass is asking for people to stare at it. Take responsibility for what you wear people! You might as well walk around naked and get angry when people stare. Girls, cover your asses the same way you should cover your vaginas. I’m so sick of people blaming others all of the time.
Edy – I don’t think that this is one of those times when things need to be balanced in that way. It’s more important to adopt a healthy sense of openness, that recognizes the pleasure many get from expressing healthy sexuality – the showing and the looking. We can agree on drawing some comfortable lines, but yoga pants should not be one of them. Far too restrictive of our enjoyment.
Edy – I used to be right with you there. I’m all about modesty – for both men and women. If you want to wear something revealing, that’s fine, but don’t get all shocked when people stare. But then something happened…I started doing yoga. I’ve never “exercised” before – usually I got my exercise walking, hiking, etc., but now I need to do the “exercise thing,” if you get what I’m saying. And the only way to comfortably do exercise is to wear exercise clothing. Which is clingy. Oversized, baggy clothes do not go with yoga or other exercise techniques.… Read more »
Why not? If a guy looks at our ass (just looks not gawking or stalking) is he harming you or do you just not like men noticing you in a sexual way without your permission? You do understand that a ass in tight pants is attractive right? Do you understand that something attractive tends to attract the eye?
There’s a difference between noticing or glancing at an attractive body part vs an uncomfortable stare down. I don’t fault men at all for the first, but the latter is threatening.
No, people are not “ASKING” for people to stare, cat call or touch. That is a very archaic and dangerous kind of thinking. I’m not surprised to see more (probably) American straight dudes thinking like that, though. You guys really never learn and are way too egocentric to see anything beyond your own penis entitlement. Be more civilized and respect others already! And yes, if I stare at someone, that is MY fault and MY responsibility… no one is forcing me to stare at anyone or anything. Hey, some people have deformities that can catch a lot of attention…. maybe… Read more »
What is also of interest in the clip is that all men who “looked” did so in a fairly benign manner. We do all agree that glancing is no big issue, right?
Nope. I don’t agree with that. I think it’s something that should be discussed.
Right after we openly speak about women staring, glancing etc at men’s packages and pec’s.
You don’t get to complain about being looked at……. unless you never look at anyone else.
This article is not about that topic. Why would we first discuss that when this article addresses the topic it wants to address? Why come into an article to discuss a topic and suggest we discuss something else *first*. Moving on, what you see as “complaining”, I see as individuals expressing their own feelings about how they want to be treated. Don’t be so dismissive of how other people feel when it’s about how they are being treated. When they are the recepients of the action. I’m probably not the right woman you want to talk to about looking at… Read more »
Hi Erin, must admit that was more of a rhetorical question. I don’t personally feel “looking/glancing” remains an act that is up for discussion. I fully accept that it is for you. This is why I would make for a terrible dictator -:)
Not only does Mr. FouseyTube discover how it feels I don’t believe he did. If you showed a random group of women the person bent over the car and the guy looking at them, those few seconds only, and ask how they would feel if that was them, I doubt the majority of their responses would line up with his feelings as we see them. but he chooses to confront the men who stare at him in a funny and relaxed way. Maybe he felt like he was funny and relaxed. But more than a few of these encounters turned… Read more »
Can someone explain to me where the homophobia is being displayed? I had a different reaction to this story entirely. I might be missing something that everyone else sees. I know that some of the men were bothered by their response to the fact that they were looking at a man’s butt, but is that enough alone to call it homophobic? Maybe it is. I’m not really sure what to think. What I did like was that a man was willing to put himself out there to see what it’s like for women. There were even two women who looked… Read more »
“I did like how the one guy was like, “Yeah, I was looking! It’s a nice ass.” “ That was very revealing to me as well. Verbally confronting a staring man like that only works if the man already has some bit of guilt about staring. If he’s not embarrassed easily or doesn’t feel that there’s anything wrong with staring, then the man may just say, “Yes, I was staring. So?” Or, “yeah, I was. While we’re on the subject, it’s a nice ass.” If a man’s embarrassed to be caught staring, then that ought to tell him something. Why… Read more »
Hearing your response and giving this a second thought, I think there has to be a middle ground between “Yeah I was looking” and showing no care for how that other person may receive the attenion. If someone catches you looking and they don’t like it, then you should be honest you were looking but apologize too. If someone catches you looking and they are fine with it, then both parties agree it’s okay. But you can’t just say “Yeah I was looking and if they don’t like it F* them, their wrong, my lust is right.” That’s not fair… Read more »
The lesson is clear.
Be careful staring at someone’s ass.
That person could be an aggressive nutcase. Only stare if you have an escape route and/or are prepared to defend yourself. The strangest things can set people off sometimes….
This is probably the story’s best takeaway. People are weird and, on occasion, do supremely weird things; no matter if you’re a boy or girl you can’t control them, only how you respond to them. And the guy in yoga pants is definitely behaving… oddly… for one in a public space, male or female. I would probably cross the street. But then again, I am also a student of Ueshiba, Rory Miller, Larry Kane and–to a lesser extent–Animal MacYoung. That surely colours my perceptions.
I was sort of sympathetic until you got to this: “As a reminder that nothing’s innocent in the way we look at women.” That sentence jumped the shark. This suggests that every time a man looks at a woman for any reason he has something to be ashamed of. (If something isn’t innocent, then it’s….what….guilty?) This falls right back into to the puritanical trap that sees sexual attraction as evil and things that are non-sexual are “innocent.” Somehow lust is impure and not innocent. What century is this? My rebuttal: looking at a butt CAN be innocent. A man should… Read more »
I found myself cringing for all kinds of reasons while watching this. The first was the overt homophobia that it demonstrated as if a man noticing a deliberately staged attention seeking act of showing off his tush, was a show of interest in sexual interaction. It’s like having a purple spotted giraffe in a room that dancing in front of you and expecting you not to notice it. He also actively engaged the passersby, pulling them into the scene. Those he confronted in many cases, felt threatened and postured back at him, rather than laughing at how ridiculous the whole… Read more »
I agree. *Maybe* looking at someone’s butt is an invasion of their personal space. Verbally confronting someone with an argument and an accusation just because he turned his head a certain way is *definitely* an invasion of personal space.
If one person has the right to wear whatever he/she wants, then other people have the right to turn their heads the way THEY want. How is criticizing someone’s eye movement more acceptable than criticizing the way someone dresses?
And other people have the right to confront those turning their heads to look at their body parts…wouldn’t you agree?
ahem……..Because the men’s self control is a more important factor than the woman’s “self control” to put on clothes
People do not criticize “eye movements”, but blatant and invasive staring. Staring, because of whatever, is really uncomfortable and feels very invasive. STARING, not innocently looking for a while or so. Just a matter of education and civilized ways.
As others have said, while I applaud the author for wanting to turn the tables on men staring at “women’s” asses, there is an undercurrent of homophobia running through it that is very, very disturbing to watch. Is it really impossible for straight people to get their shit together around the often-troubled relationships between men and women without engaging that cultural homophobia through the use of offensive—and very dangerous—stereotypes. I’m glad that the author had his cameraman, and I’m glad that he was secure enough in his heterosexual privilege to play this particular game, but engaging the accidental lust of… Read more »
“(…)engaging the accidental lust of straight men, then shaming them once they realize they’ve been tricked, is the kind of thing that gets gay and trans people beaten to a pulp, or murdered.”
So are you saying most of the straight guys that beat or murder trans and gay people do so because their lust were “accidentally engaged” and then shamed? Sorry, but I do not see it, at least nor for the majority of them.
I actually really dislike this. The was he aggressively flirts with/pursues the men in an effeminate voice would read as “gay” to most people, reinforcing a stereotype we fight all the time (oh, you’re a man, you want me, eeewww).
I understand he was trying to do a turn the tables, but I wish he’d have found a way to do it without resorting to gay stereotypes.
I concur. This was so close to amazing. SO CLOSE. Frankly, the best part left is just when the guy admits “I thought you were a girl”. The way this video was done is less about recognizing the behavior of the men walking by, and more about their responses to a guy hitting on them.
both your reactions mirror the queerty commentors (most of whom are non-straight men). who when the vid was posted a few days ago, were also not in favour of his behaviour. i didnt watch as most respondents werent happy with his conduct.
http://www.queerty.com/man-wears-leggings-to-trick-straight-guys-into-checking-out-his-thick-booty-20140303/
I originally watched this on Queerty but didn’t read any of the comments. My poor guypartner, though, had to listen to mine.