As a result of all the awareness (as well as criticism and conflict) that came about as a result of the Hollaback! catcalling video (you know the one, the woman walked through NYC streets and was harassed an average of 10 times an hour), interesting conversations are popping up all over the Internet.
Some criticism of the video include the fact that the editing of the video was weighted to put emphasis on the catcalls made by men of color, particularly Black men, particularly in one neighborhood in Harlem.
Other critiques are that the story focused upon what seems to be a white woman’s experience in neighborhoods that are presumably not hers, and that instead the video should have focused on a diverse set of women’s experiences in their own communities.
Valid criticisms aside, the conversation as been started, and one awesome guy, Elon James White (who has one of the funniest, most thoughtful Twitter feeds you’ll find), wants us to think about what would happen if straight dudes said to one another the stuff dudes say to women.
If it’s true that dudes aren’t really harassing women for sexual reasons, then they should be comfortable saying that stuff to guys, right? Thus #DudesGreetingDudes was born. And it fits right into my framework for when greetings with strangers would be okay:
If you wouldn’t feel comfortable saying it to another guy, or to your granny, don’t say it to me.
BuzzFeed, of course, jumped in and made a funny video based upon Elon James White’s hashtag.
So, what do you think? Is #DudesGreetingDudes tapping into homophobia? Elon James White has definitely been addressing and giving respect to those who make this claim. Do you think he misses the point?
Is it awkward to see guys saying this sort of stuff to one another?
I have been greeted like some of the more tame examples in this video (like the guy awkwardly walking up and asking a stranger how he’s doing). Sometimes it’s annoying, sometimes not. Overall I’m glad to live in a regional subculture where talking to strange people on the street, even uninvited out of the blue type approaches, is not that uncommon or strange.
The not-tame examples given, where the guy is persistent and passive aggressive I would say, have never happened to me and I’d be annoyed if they did.
This is absurd. It doesn’t even happen. Homosexuals are already on notice that any kind of public expression of attraction to a straight man could result in physical retribution. In light of the fact that only 10% of the population is gay there is a high likelihood a guy cat calling another guy is likely not to end well for the cat caller. When compared to the recent video put out by Hollaback there really is no comparison, while some of the comments were over the top most of them were pretty tame and respectful.
Problem is, this question “Does this video make you uncomfortable?” has no acceptable answer. If it is assumed that I neither commit nor condone harassment (which is the case) then there is no real reason to ask that question in the first place. It sounds like a device to confront culpable men with their own behavior: If I answer yes, I could be told “Then why have you not stopped harassing yet, if you know how bad it feels?” If I answer no, I could be told “See how your privilege blinds you into excusing unexcusable violating behavior? You are… Read more »