If This Gets Me Laid I Will Be Very Surprised

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About Gregory Sherl

Gregory Sherl's first full-length poetry collection, Heavy Petting, was released last October. His newest book, The Oregon Trail is the Oregon Trail, is out this month. He blogs/reviews/interviews here.<


  1. 1. Take off Pillow Case.
    2. Wash Hands.
    3. Hold Pillow with Knees, against clean PJ Pants.
    4. Slip pillow case over the end of the pillow, release from knees.
    5. Flip pillow so it falls into case.

    That’s how you change a pillow case without getting it dirty. =)

  2. midwestmatt says:

    Having suffered through a, somewhat, mild case of OCD for more than 2 years, I can empathize with the author and how his brain races from thought to thought. Reading his words brought back stark memories of how my thoughts bounced from the connected subject to the disconnected subjects and back again. I hated it and it drove me to suicide.

    It’s so unnerving and enervating that it can topple the strongest of men.

    I used Paxil to relieve my symptoms and talk therapy with a great therapist. She worked wonders and so did Paxil. After only 2 months on Paxil, my symptoms were a fraction of their former strength and I was on my way to healing.

    Unfortunately, getting off of Paxil is the worst. Don’t miss a dose or brain zaps start within 2-4 hours. It took me three months to finally get off of it.

    When someone has diagnosed OCD, don’t judge but rather help them as the symptoms are hell to live with.

  3. i am going to send you a bull terrier puppy

  4. laura Novak says:

    I applaud your writing and appreciate your honesty. But as with the other writer above who takes the Paxil, don’t give up. Just try to find the right medication. You don’t have to live with thoughts that overwhelm you. Yes, they help make you a great writer and probably a very sensitive and caring friend and son. But no one should ponder a broken bridge that deeply. There’s hope in a bottle. Brain chemistry can be fixed. You just need to find the right one. I wish you well and I’m sure your story will help so many people.

  5. I love you & your magical words

  6. I have OCD. I know I’ve had it since I was a child.

    You remind me of when I was in my late 20s and struggling with my out of control OCD.

    Meds and talk therapy worked for me and continue to. I’m now at the point that OCD just makes me quirky.

    So my message to you is that one day it won’t be as bad as it is today. Best wishes and hugs.

  7. Brilliant.

  8. The time of the year is terrible. It’ll get better in January. Until then, the voice in my head says nothing ever gets better, but I know that it’s a lie and they will get better. Right now my OCD and depression like to fight it out, but always gets better After the holidays.

    Beautiful, poetic article.

  9. Lisa Hickey says:

    The only thing I can’t reconcile is the sadness in your words here with the gorgeousness of the words in your poetry.

    I already told you that one of the favorite lines I’ve ever read is:

    “I was so excited to talk
    to you, I put on the wrong lips.”

    In the conversation after the poem, you told me how you wrote that about a girl at a bar you kept seeing but could never get yourself to talk to.

    Your OCD puts up walls that your poetry breaks down in a heartbeat.
    Looking forward to as many more words from you as you can write.

  10. MetalRabbit13 says:

    Hi, Gregory. First, with permission, (((Hugs))). I learned to ask a long time ago, in a group that I was attending. I learned that if you’ve been abused or through any other trauma and suffer from PTSD, that you may not like to be touched without being asked. Me, I used to startle very easily.
    Second, as I’m writing this in the wee hours of the morning, my local PBS station war rerunning a show, “Change Your Brain, Change Your Body” with Dr. Daniel Amen. I’ve read that book as well as “Change Your Brain, Change Your Life”. In both books, he talks about ANTS — Automatic Negative Thoughts — and ANT killers. This is a 4 step exercise he recommends when you have sad, mad or anxious thoughts.
    You write down the thought or thoughts and then, you ask and answer:
    1. Is it [the thought(s)] true?
    2. Can I absolutely know that it’s true?
    3. How do I feel when I have that thought?
    4. Who would I be or how would I feel if I didn’t have that thought?
    Then, you turn the original thought around and ask which is truer.
    He gives the example of a wonderful friend of his whose husband had died and who wanted another relationship but was telling herself, “No one will want a 75 yr. old woman.”. She turned it around to “SOMEONE will want a 75 yr. old woman.”. According to Dr. Amen, she met someone and has been happily married since 2007. Or as Al Jarreau says in one of my favorite songs, “Random Act of Love”: Flip your script.

  11. MetalRabbit13 says:

    P.S. I meant to mention, I have fights with my thoughts sometimes, although I don’t have OCD. When I start to get a negative thought and obsess a bit, I quickly stamp ‘CANCEL, CANCEL, CANCEL” across it (Like those stamps they have in old movies?) and say it in my mind. Then for good measure I crumple it up and kick it through mental goal posts where it bursts into flames like fireworks and the energy gets recycled. The goal posts are from the title of a supposed real country song, “Kick me, God, Through The Goal Posts of Heaven”. I just get the biggest kick out of that. (No pun, intended. Well…) . :)


  1. [...] Gregory Sherl needs to stop breaking my heart. Just [...]

  2. [...] Good Man Project has become a daily stop for me and Gregory Sherl has a new installment of his [...]

  3. [...] Read Sherl’s last story, “If This Gets Me Laid I Will Be Very Surprised,” here. [...]

  4. [...] insight about that. And telling that story in a very personal, narrative way. For instance, we had Gregory Sherl who writes about his struggles with OCD and we had Matt Salesses who has a column called “Love [...]

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