No one has ever threatened violence against me, or said I was too ugly to rape. Why? Male privilege.
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Check out more stories from Ravishly’s special series on misogynist trolling here. Have a perspective or experience you’d like to add to the discussion? Email our editors at[email protected].
I stopped reading the comments on my published articles years ago because of troglodytes. But that hasn’t stopped said cave-dwellers from reaching out via other means to let me know I’ve vexed them.
I have the unique perspective of getting hate mail for writing articles about fitness and feminism, and the only death threat I’ve received resulted from referring to Jillian Michaels as “an actress playing the role of a trainer on TV.”
Men’s rights activists are whiney children who think every woe they face is the fault of feminism. When a woman writes negatively about them, their reaction is to go apocalyptic. Beyond exposing MRA, any woman who writes in favor of feminism and decries misogyny faces an online onslaught designed to silence.
Unfortunately, sometimes it works. As a recent Washington Post article explained, some women are retiring from feminist writing because of such attacks; attacks that threaten rape and death, and which drive them from their homes and cause them to cancel public appearances. What’s more, fake ads that solicit violent sex are placed in their names, insulting and sexually threatening blogs are written, and the social media and email harassment is never ending.
I cannot imagine the courage it takes for a woman to face such unceasing vitriol and continue working for equality and justice. Really, I can’t imagine it, because as a man, I’ve never had to face it. You want yet another example of male privilege? It’s being able to voice your opinion and not face death and rape threats as a result.
It doesn’t matter that I’ve praised feminism or called out MRA bullshit on multiple occasions; I’ve never had to face such threats for no other reason than I have a Y chromosome. No one has ever threatened violence against me, published my address or phone number, placed fake ads in my name, said I was too ugly to rape . . . The reaction of anti-feminists to my writings has been paltry compared to what it would be were I a woman.
Yes, there were the Twitter and Facebook insults, calling me a “mangina” and a “pussy faggot.” There were those who insisted my website URL, bodyforwife.com, was an indication of me being in thrall to anyone with a vagina. It was all very childish and petty.
Beyond that, I was most often called a liar, saying I misrepresented MRA. In fact, many seemed determined to win me to their side. They felt that I had misunderstood men’s rights and wanted to educate me, saying I didn’t realize how poorly men are treated in modern society, and that if I’d just open my eyes—and have my “red pill” moment—I’d stop defending feminism and instead join the legions of the butt hurt as their ally.
The men who attack feminism are the worst kind of cowards. They despise strong women, and fear strong men. Actually, they fear strong women as well, which is why they often hide behind anonymous avatars when launching their attacks. The vileness of their harassment against women feminists is tenfold that sent toward male allies of feminism.
Being an ally of such courageous women is an honor, and one that more men should embrace.
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This article originally appeared on Ravishly.
Photo credit:Ministerio TIC Colombia/flickr
MRA’s, like Feminists come in all types. Neither one is a single monolithic entity.
That’s funny because I’ve seen plenty of male feminists say they have gotten threats from trolls.
Hell I’ve been trolled by extreme MRA nut jobs and I’m male and I even lean slightly MRA.
The problem here is that you are taking your experiences and trying to draw a universal conclusion that simply does not hold.
This article does absolutely nothing for feminist/MRA relations except for set back anything that could be called progress in ending the fighting.
You’re beating your chest which I find to be pretty ironic considering the message this site pushes.
This article is high on emotion, but low on facts …. just one self-proclaimed “courageous ally” talking of his own personal experience, then extrapolating that out to be reality! Another “clickbait” article to add the growing GMP collection!
I’d be interested to read a balanced article that references academic studies on trolling. Something backed by facts, not just an emotional slap dash piece that seems designed to just get men and women fighting with each other (and more exposure for the author).
We need more peace makers and less war mongers. Especially on GMP!
Amen!
This article was apparently written for ‘Ravishly’ and just parachuted into the GMP, but that technicality aside, I agree with your sentiments- thanks Nick!
I second that
Heck, you don’t even have to be writing about feminism to get sexually threatened or demeaned as a woman online. As we’ve seen with the incident with Curt Shillings daughter where a couple of men who becamse sexually abusive online to his 17 year old daughter for the simple reason that Curt was proud of her going to college. And the recent news story of the 13 year old Mo’ne Davis ball player who was called a “sl*t” by a grown man. It is crazy the kind of things men feel entitled to say to you online. Demanding naked pictures,… Read more »
I am a MGTOW who has never hidden behind a screen name, or ever threatened anyone else. For me it is not about fearing women, but rejecting a system where men are seen as just appliances whose sole purpose is to provide for others and/or die if necessary. If women want to be part of that same system where you are just a replaceable cog in a machine, that’s fine by me. Is it “freedom” to sit in a cubicle for 40 hours a week, or get shipped off to the Middle East and come home in a casket?
“a system where men are seen as just appliances whose sole purpose is to provide for others” is part of the problem Feminism seeks to correct. No one should be put in that situation, you should be respected for who you are and encouraged to follow your talents and dreams, the same as any other man or woman.
I don’t see f em in is m trying to correct any of it. It’s a platform with nothing behind it. It’s the proverbial “”talking the talk” and no more. There have been NO campaigns to correct anything. In fact, with some courts where they have attempted to level the mom/dad playing field, I have seen aggressive campaigns against it. They continue to promote VAW and no more then a mere mention, if that, regarding violence against men.
Behold the “White Knight” the self-proclaimed “ally of such courageous women”.
behold the bitter man!
Or how about
“No one has ever threatened violence against me, or said I was too ugly to rape. Why? Male privilege”
and yet says this
“I have the unique perspective of getting hate mail for writing articles about fitness and feminism, and the only death threat I’ve received”
So apparantly receiving a death threat is NOT threatening violence.
It’s a shame some men can’t admit to being harassed. Maybe if we stopped painting it as something men do to women…..
The OP wrote this
“I stopped reading the comments on my published articles years ago because of troglodytes”
If you stopped reading the comments years ago. How do you know that you haven’t received threats etc.
Indeed.
Because he read them before he stopped reading them
“The University of California-Santa Barbara professor who allegedly assaulted a pro-life student on campus has been charged with criminal battery. The College Fix reported on March 12 that department of feminist studies professor Mireille Miller-Young, whose research emphasis is black studies, pornography, and sex work, had been caught on camera assaulting a 16-year-old student, Thrin Short.” http://www.thecollegefix.com/post/16817/ “If you want to see the true face of hateful bigotry, you would be hard-pressed to find a better current example than this disturbing video footage of radical feminists savagely attacking and even sexually molesting the cathedral’s peaceful guardians. ” “During the attack… Read more »
What is your point? People get angry, people sometimes resort to violence, that doesn’t invalidate feminism or offer support to anti-feminist ideas.
@ sam Point is that the OP asserts that men are privileged because they don’t have to deal with threats of violence including sexual violence from anonymous internet trolls that does not and will never take place. Why do they make these anonymous threats? Probably in part because if they did them openly society and the law wouldn’t tolerate it. Yet 1,000s of women can sexually abuse 100s of men in the open in the presence of police and not face any reprisal. Where is the media coverage? Where are the feminists denouncing sexual abuse? Where are the feminists denying… Read more »
I think what the AUTHOR is saying is that MRA are cowards who like to bully women but fear other men may be an actual threat to them physically
@ sam A couple months ago a young men I was mentoring had concerns that his younger brother was getting involved in gang activity. He arranged for us to meet his brother. He told me he was bringing a knife and asked if I was going to bring one. I told him no because I didn’t intend to fight. When we arrived, there were five other guys there. Of course, I was the only one without a weapon. My mentee was surprised that after I spoke with them, his brother not only decided to leave, but the gang members said… Read more »
If the people criticising the MRM were in any way consistent, it would.
The MRM has some trolls? Well, that just shows that it’s a hate movement and how necessary feminism is.
Feminism has some trolls? Don’t be silly, that doesn’t prove anything!
Thanks to computer technology, it is much easier for people to attack other people base on anything and everything. Look at all the racists who came out on the internet when Obama was elected not only once but also twice. I have read stories about women who use computers to back stab and gossip about both men and women including their own friends.