When Chuck Chapman finally started listening to himself, he finally started being happy.
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At your core of you, is your Gut. It is your compass. It is your core consciousness or what I like to call “wisdom.” If you could shed all of your neuroses, doubt, shame, feelings of guilt, inadequacies, and anxiety you would find it—you would find your Gut. It’s there like your heart beat. Apply your attention to it and you will feel it vibrate from within. It wants to guide you in making decisions and protect you from failure.
So often I find my Gut comes in the form of a feeling of knowing what to do, but being faced with outside voices telling me “You’re crazy!” It is what made me leave the corporate world and its trappings of success and pursue becoming a sole proprietor and therapist. It is that thing that made men like Walt Disney, Steve Jobs, Orville and Wilbur Wright, Theodore Roosevelt, and so many others great men. They all followed their Gut in the face of objections and adversity.
As you read this, you may even now hear your Gut calling you. You resonate with the idea that you need to listen to it. Quiet yourself in this moment and ask “What are you saying to me?” then listen! Listen as if you were trying to hear a whisper in another room and refuse to leave until it answers you.
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Most men … live not out of a core consciousness but out of obligation and compliance. They fear making a mistake or disappointing others.
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I find that most men I talk with have lost the ability to hear their Gut. The noise of responsibility, fear of inadequacy, and shame have deafened their attention to it. They live not out of a core consciousness but out of obligation and compliance. They fear making a mistake or disappointing others. They hide behind outward recognition of vanity and the meaningless collection of stuff.
No one has ever said “I wish I hadn’t followed my Gut.” But how many times do we say “I wish I had listened to what my Gut was telling me.”
Ego wants self-fulfillment while Gut operates out of giving life. The essence of masculinity is to give life.
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But … And here is the big but; you have to learn how to distinguish between your Gut and your ego. Listen to them now, you can almost hear them fighting with each other. Your Gut and your ego are at odds like David and Goliath. Ego wants self-fulfillment while Gut operates out of giving life. The essence of masculinity is to give life. It is represented in our seed. Ask your Gut if this is true or not and listen to what it says. You can know the difference by knowing that it is your Gut that gives you life and it is your ego that takes life. Gut lives from abundance and from a place of life giving source. Ego takes out of selfish desire and is never satisfied. Ego tells you not to trust your Gut but go with what’s easy. Following your ego is like eating a cupcake. It’s good for a moment and feels like happiness, but it is only empty calories with no substance that leads to craving more.
Learn to discern. What is your Gut telling you? Follow it no matter what and you will find happiness even in the midst of the most difficult struggles. You will find contentment—which is lasting happiness.
Originally published at Oregon City Counseling.
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