It’s go time. Anthony J. Yeung, CSCS, discusses the 5 steps you need to slim down for the big day.
Your wedding day is the one of the biggest days of your life. You’re probably working on the tux, the music, the invitations, the meals, the venue, and the photographers, even the right floral arrangements.
But do you look the part?
“I want to look amazing for the love of my life,” is something I hear all the time. These guys want to drop the annoying belly fat they’ve gained over the years, feel confident for their wedding, and stop feeling self-conscious about their body. Well guys, this is the perfect time to make a huge transformation before the next chapter of your lives.
Part of my day job is to help grooms look amazing for their wedding (I’m not even joking — check out GroomBuilder). There is no “magic pill” to get our grooms to slash fat, build lean muscle, and transform their bodies. It takes hard work and a system that works again and again.
Today, I’m giving you the exact recipe to transform the way you look and feel for your big day. I’ll even take the guesswork out of the progress and show you how to defeat obstacles like “lack of time” and “no motivation.” And by the time your wedding comes around, you’ll walk down that aisle with confidence, start your new life on the right foot, and impress the love of your life.
A word of caution: I spent years training clients, studying the science, talking to other fitness experts, testing different exercise protocols, and, hell, even using myself as a guinea pig — this is the culmination of all it. Don’t just read it, say, “Oh, that looks nice” and then go watch SportsCenter. If you’re going to do that, I’ll save you the time and recommend you read a different article at The Good Men Project.
But if you’re ready for a REAL change, read on, learn from it, and act on it.
Step One: Know Your Goal
What do you want to do with your body? Lose fat? Gain muscle? Drop the belly fat?
Okay. So far, so good. Well, here’s the next question:
How will you know when you get there?
Put in another way, how much fat do you want to lose? How much muscle are you trying to gain? Get super specific and WRITE IT DOWN.
No goal is real until you write it down. That’s the first step. A dream is a dream — a project is something actionable. Write it down on a piece of paper or type it up and sign it. Then, put that piece of paper somewhere where you can see it all the time.
Whenever I have goals, I write them down in a green, spiral-bound notebook I bought when I lived in South Korea (full disclosure: I’m not Korean.). The pages are worn and the English that came printed on the pages is spotty at best, but it helps me bring things into reality and map out the next steps.
Which takes me to my next step:
Step Two: Create Your Plan
“Failing to plan is planning to fail.”
I love that quote. It’s got a nice rhythm to it, but it’s also the most important part to a successful fitness transformation. Even “Pinky and the Brain” had plans.
Let’s look at some examples: Lazy Larry and Planning Pete. Both are trying to lose fat, but they have two very different ways of getting there.
Lazy Larry shows up to the gym and picks the exercises he’s always done: a few dumbbell moves, some machine exercises, and a long jog on the treadmill. He’s not exactly sure how much he’s doing and how heavy, but he does whatever feels “hard” and tries to “do more.” When he eats, he picks things he “thinks” are healthy — salads! No-fat foods! A grapefruit for breakfast! — and tries to eat “less” food overall. After one month, Larry loses a pound or two.
Planning Pete sits down in advance maps out his exercise plan. What exercises is he going to do? How many reps and sets? How long is his rest? How will that change over time as he gets results? (I’ll show you how to do this.) Then, he figures out what to eat for his particular goal (which I’ll also show you how to do). With a road map for his diet, he goes to the grocery store and gets the right foods to match his plan. Planning Pete also works a 60hr/week job so he commits to only two workouts per week —because that’s all he can do — building it into his schedule and telling his fiancée to slap him in the face every time he skips a workout; his girl then begins strengthening her mechanics by slapping trees and tearing phonebooks. After one month, Pete loses six pounds of fat, while gaining muscle.
Don’t be Lazy Larry. Create a real plan and structure to get real results.
How To Build Your Fitness Plan:
Once you walk into the gym, what should you do? What exercises, machines, etc. will get you the best results for your goal? Here are the guidelines:
- Free-weight, complex exercises. Avoid dinky exercises like machines or tricep pushdowns. Instead, focus on total-body strength exercises like squats, rows, and presses to burn calories, build strength, and add lean muscle. They also target many muscle groups simultaneously, which gives you more benefits in less time.
- A layered approach. I want my clients to get both rapid and long-term results; thus, I recommend starting by building real foundations. Don’t jump into the fire and destroy yourself on Day One — that’s just asking for shitty results (due to high stress) and injuries. Instead, start by building good technique and movement mechanics and develop resiliency and work capacity. Now, when you get the next phase, you can build upon your foundation and get better, more-effective results.
- Reps and rest. Rest as little as possible between exercises. Sure, there are times to break this rule, but when you’re just starting out, I would rather you focus on building your work capacity. As for reps and sets, there’s a lot to talk about here, but to keep things simple, I recommend staying between 4 – 8 reps for your exercises and going heavy.
- A thorough warmup. To have a great workout, you need a great warmup. The right series of dynamic stretches and breathing exercises can improve your movement, open those tight joints and muscles, and get your body and nervous system in the right mood to lift weight, lift heavy, and lift safely.
- A smart cardio program. Cardio is great, but you have to do the right kind of cardio, especially in conjunction with a strength-training program. If you’re just starting out, I always recommend people focus on building a solid base in aerobic fitness — easy jogs, hikes, bike rides, etc. — because it’ll make everything easier. It isn’t as sexy as telling someone to do a high intensity interval workout (which you will build up to), but for long-term benefits, I always suggest guys start slow and smart.
- Get rest. Get eight good hours of sleep every night (you hear this all the time, but it really is that important to your overall health and fitness goals). Also, take some time to decompress everyday. That could be as simple as closing your eyes after lunch for five minutes and focusing on your breathing, practicing mediation, or taking a long, hot bath every now and then.
How To Build Your Diet Plan:
The first step is to determine how much of each macronutrient you need. Everything falls into “macronutrients,” which are carbs, protein, and fats. And contrary to that whole “carbs are evil” myth, you need all three.
For guys who want to lose fat, their best bet would be to focus on proteins and fats and eat fewer carbs. A sample lunch would be one large buffalo burger patty and a mixed salad with colorful veggies and a few slices of avocado. Or, if you’re looking for something more creative, you can make a quick stir-fry with veggies and a diced-up chicken breast. For guys looking to gain weight, eat more carbs while dialing back on the fat.
Wait Anthony, don’t fats make you fat?!
No. In fact, there so many science-backed articles on this topic, I’ll just let you do a Google search and read the research in your spare time.
What really makes you fat is a lack of exercise and a crappy diet. Sure, we know the usual culprits — fries, cakes, donuts, etc. — but don’t forget those other foods high in processed sugars, carbs, and oils.
The second step is determining the right food portions. I rarely have people count their calories because, quite honestly, if they start eating the right foods and focusing on the right macronutrients, they’ll almost instantly see changes in their body.
Make sure to get at least a serving of protein and veggies with every meal. Also, choose specific sizes and measurements. For example, if you’re trying to gain weight, don’t just say, “I’m going to eat more” — “more” is too subjective. Do you usually eat one chicken breast for dinner? Eat two. Do you usually eat 1 cup of rice? Eat 1¼ cup. This way, there’s nothing left to interpretation or feel and you can adjust as you progress.
Which leads us to our next point…
Step Three: Take Measurements
Before you start a fitness transformation, I recommend taking inventory on where you currently stand. Why? Because you want to periodically measure your progress to see if you’re getting the results you want — if not, you can make adjustments. Also, this way, you can brag to your friends when you shed 12lbs of fat and add 5 pounds of muscle.
Here are the numbers you want to find out:
- Body weight
- Body fat percentage
- Circumference measurements
Ask a trainer at your local gym and they should be able to get these numbers for you. I also recommend taking photos of yourself in just your underwear from the front, back, and side.
Step Four: Execute Your Plan
Congratulations, you have your plan! You know exactly what you’re going to eat, how much of it, and what you’re going to do in the gym. But there’s still one more step to go.
What do you think is the most common obstacle for guys trying to transform their body?
Give up?
“No time.”
“I’d love to get in shape and change my life, Anthony, but I just don’t have the time.”
Guys, the harsh truth is that “time” is a bullshit excuse. We all have the same amount of time per day: you, me, and the President of the United States all have 24 hours per day. And with the time we waste watching television and screwing around on social media, I’ll bet it’s not difficult to find just two or three hours every week to invest on your own fitness.
Hell, as an example: I have a client who is a top surgeon at one of the best hospitals in America and even he manages to find time for a workout, sometimes after spending all night working at the hospital. Admittedly, we don’t have the greatest workout on Earth, but 60 minutes of mediocre training beats zero minutes of hardcore training.
But time isn’t the real excuse.
When guys say they’re “too busy,” what they’re really saying is that “it’s just not a high priority to me.” Or they’re saying, “I actually don’t know how to accomplish this goal so I’m disguising it by blaming time.”
And frankly, if you can’t find the time to exercise now, it’s going to get way harder when you have a house, a busier job, and a wife and kids — life gets busier with a family of five, mortgage payments, two cars, and a college fund. If it doesn’t happen now, chances are it won’t happen.
Also, let’s not forget the excuse of, “I just need to get motivated,” which is a recipe for disaster. First, it declares that your goal relies on an external factor (motivation). Second, everyone loses motivation at some point.
Don’t let this be you. You have your plan. Follow these steps to execute it:
- Start by building in the habits. First, put it in your calendar — that way, you’ve already reserved the time for it to happen. As events pop up throughout the week, schedule it around your designated workout time.
- Make it difficult to NOT exercise. If you want exercise after work, for example, put your gym bag in your car.
- Get an accountability buddy. Find a friend with a similar goal and push each other in the right direction. Your groomsmen, perhaps? If all your friends are lazy, however, either (a) get new friends — I’m kidding — or (b) join an online group or find a workout partner at your gym.
- Start small. For those who are truly busy, commit to just ONE workout per week. Just one?! Yes, just one. It seems silly. It seems useless. It seems almost too easy. But think about it: one workout per week is more than none. I always see guys create an overwhelming goal of five workouts per week and get frustrated when they miss Monday and Tuesday; start small and ramp up once you build momentum.
- Create punishments. Some respond better to the carrot; some respond better to the stick. If you like the occasional kick in the ass, find ways to create punishments. For example, if you miss a workout, you can pay $20 to a friend. Get creative. Remember Homer Simpson’s “swear jar?”
- Focus on behaviors, not results. If you pay too much attention to the scale, you’ll frustrate yourself throughout the ebbs-and-flows of fat loss. Instead, focus on what you can control. Great goal ideas are something like, “I will do 3 workouts per week,” or, “I will eat healthy 90% of the time,” or, “I will do cardio 2x/week,” etc.
That’s how you create effective change.
Final Step: F@#%ing Do It!
You’ve made it! You now have the game plan to burn off those last ten pounds, look like the badass you really are, and have the time of your life with the love of your life.
This seems obvious, but honestly, most guys fail right here: they’ll say they want these great fitness and health goals, but they won’t do one thing to make it happen (sound familiar?).
Guys, take the first step to get started right now. Your wedding is one of the biggest days of your life; make sure you look the part.
Get started today and you’ll be there faster than you think.
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Photo credit: Flickr/Pete