The “Still Not Asking For It” Photo, And STFU’s Response

Still Not Asking for it

This is making the rounds on Facebook, as it should. [Full photo below] Stereotypes about men still need to be shattered, apparently. They are not sharks.

We found it on Sebastian Bieniek’s Facebook page, and he added this commentary:

This photo was posted on STFU, Conservatives Tumblr page last night. The reason why I’m sharing it is not because of the photo itself (which is epic in it’s own right), but for the comments it generated.One person wrote, “but then again, its kind like putting a meat suit on and telling a shark not to eat you”.

STFU responded (with bolded text):

“We (men) are not fucking sharks!

We are not rabid animals living off of pure instinct

We are capable of rational thinking and understanding.

Just because someone is cooking food doesn’t mean you’re entitled to eat it.

Just because a banker is counting money doesn’t mean you’re being given free money.

Just because a person is naked doesn’t mean you’re entitled to fuck them.

You are not entitled to someone else’s body just because it’s exposed.

What is so fucking difficult about this concept?”


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  1. Elysia Annacini Paladino says:

    Love this. I agree that I’m not asking for sex when I’m naked and vulnerable. The naked body doesn’t always mean sex. Sex is only to be mutually agreed on, not stolen or forced, definitely not drugging anybody into. Trying to feel liberated though still loving men, people, and their body image, doesn’t mean a woman is asking for sex.

  2. Anonymous says:

    but is she asking for lung cancer?

  3. This whole thing is so misguided. Most men don’t go around raping people. Just like most men don’t go around killing people. Not because a basic drive to have sex and gouge our rivals doesn’t exist but because the majority of humans are decent and have enough empathy to feel and imagine even some of the terror and emotional pain they would cause by doing it, and therefore would not do it because they understand at least a bit of how awful it would be to be the subject of such an attack, man or woman. Unfortunately, there is a certain percentage of people who simply do not have the emotional intelligence to make that distinction, and even those who ENJOY causing other people pain. This is not just about men attacking women, it is about the small percentage of humans who don’t have the non-violence filter aligned correctly. You really think women suffer more violence at the hands of men, than men do????? Of course not. Men are far more frequently brutal towards each other. It’s not a “woman’s” issue. It’s an issue of violence which affects everyone. To that end, yes, ideally women should be able to walk around naked, but given that that small percentage of people will always exist…you’re not asking for it, but fucking hell, help yourself and don’t make yourself an obvious target just to make a misguided point about how awful men’s attitudes are towards you. “Men” aren’t the problem. I don’t walk through a rough neighbourhood waving my wallet above my head, talking loudly on my iPhone about how much my watch costs. Because, whilst most people in that neighbourhood would leave me be, I know there are a few dangerous people in it and a couple would probably, on impulse, attack me and take my stuff. So I do MY part to keep myself safe. I take, not all, but A SHARE of responsibility for what happens to me because I’m an adult and I realise life isn’t perfect, it isn’t fair, and the I HAVE THE RIGHT TO FEEL SAFE argument is simply not a reality for ANYONE!!! Quite frankly it’s childish and ill-thought out.

    • Oh, thank God we have Ben here to remind us that not-literally-every-single-solitary man is an, ahem, legitimate rapist. And to remind us to pay attention to the victims who actually matter, i.e., men who are the victims of male violence. Bravo, good sir. Godspeed.

    • Ben, thank you for your comment. You’ve adeptly put into words my feelings about the topic which I was never quite able to articulate.

    • anonymous says:

      Ben, you are missing the point. I do agree in protecting yourself, but, women are raped no matter how much, or how little clothing they wear. When a women is raped, the first question most ask is “what was she wearing?” As if what a women wears in any indication of what she “wants.” When a man is raped, because, yes, it does happen, do people ask that same question?

      • amy glass says:

        “When a man is raped, because, yes, it does happen, do people ask that same question?”
        No, people don’t ask the same question about what he was wearing because mostly, people don’t even believe him and they make fun of him for being raped. Raped men have little to no resources available to them, and they are usually the butt of jokes, because society is unwilling to acknowledge them. Acknowledging that men can be raped and be victims of domestic violence means acknowledging that women can be rapists and violent and society is not comfortable acknowledging that.

    • Great post, Ben.

  4. Ben, (in general),men are violent against men and men (in general) are violent against women.
    So, we have to assume that men are more violent than women.

    Please don’t lecture about how unsafe the world is for men. Women grow up being told how careful and aware they have to be in every circumstance. Women are fearful walking down ANY street alone, day or night.

    • Thank you. YES.

    • Mostly_123 says:

      Ann, generally I disagree with you here because (generally) the people who think like you are wrong, and, generally, the people who think like me are right (generally speaking). And I know this because, -generally- there are far more people that share experiences & beliefs like mine, rather than yours, and so my generalizations are broader than your generalizations. Therefore, by the weight of greater generalization, my experiences and perspectives are simply & proportionately more valid compared to yours, generally. 

      Thus (generally speaking) your opinions and arguments have far less weight, and therefore should therefore be taken far less seriously, because, generally, I am speaking with even greater presumptive weight and authority of all other people who think like me, and, generally, by weight of numbers, their experiences and beliefs are, of course, more truthful, and legitimate than yours. 

      In other words, your appeal there to the authority of generalizations and hyperbole is un-compelling and unbecoming (generally speaking). Generally, generalizations don’t add weight or legitimacy or objectivity to one’s own argument or experiences; rather, they expose it as weak, flimsy, biased, and subjective.   

  5. “What is so fucking difficult about this concept?” There is a lot of mixed messages being conveyed here and yes it is difficult to figure out. If this young woman is being sexually provocative in a public place while sending the message that she is not being sexual, I detect a bit of cognitive dissonance. All sorts of primal chains are being yanked and everyone is expecting a calm, rational response. I find this very offensive and manipulative. GMP should have more sense and balls than to stoop to this level of gutter emotionality. When did you become the National Enquirer? I expect a higher level of discourse than obvious muckraking and using a semi nude woman’s body to stir the pot.

    • There’s no “cognitive dissonance” here. It’s very, very simple. No matter how “sexually provocative” someone is being, you do not have the right to have sex with them without their consent.

      • Being provocative confuses the message. Please notice that no one in this picture is even attempting to have sex with this crazy woman or even paying her any attention other than the voyeur photographer. As a therapist of mine said, ” if you say crazy things, expect a crazy response.” There is a lot of craziness being expressed here and being naive and feigning innocence is frankly insane. Why aren’t her mother or sisters, friends helping her make better decisions for herself? Crazy attracts like kinds. Yes, as adults, we are responsible for our actions. This is sexual provocation and there really is no sane defense. Again, I fault GMP for stirring this pot with such inflammatory BS.

  6. amy glass says:

    “Sorry, but our system has recognized you may be a spammer. Your comment has been held in our spam moderation queue.”
    No I am not a spammer and can you please release my comment after it is reviewed by a human? I am a regular reader and commenter on the GMP website. Thank you.

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