Fellas. Texting etiquette is a real thing. If a woman isn’t texting you back, here’s why.
Why do women fail to reply to your messages? Initially, I planned to write this post from the perspective of an aggravated male who had been in the position to be left hanging.
You all know the type — the needy guy who messages girls constantly, rarely receiving a reply and who may feel compelled to buy girls drinks in exchange for conversation. However, the more I thought, the more I understood why women so often do not respond. Check out these four reasons:
1. They are bombarded with similar messages.
Imagine signing into Facebook only to find a handful of unread messages from numerous guys, all of whom are interested in “catching up for a coffee” or “wanting to hang out.”
Guys shoot themselves in the foot by being unmemorable and asking for what everyone else is offering. We need to offer something different to be attention grabbing, so rather than saying something along the lines of “let’s catch up,” learn about the woman’s interests and suggest to do something to reflect them.
2. Once women know they can have you, you’re fighting an uphill battle.
If she knows she can have you, you automatically become a backburner prospect — you’re just not that exciting to her.
So, never provide her with too much information and don’t be afraid to leave things up in the air. Don’t confuse this with coming across as indecisive — indifference can be enticing and it’ll make her more likely to engage with you.
3. You’re not mysterious enough.
Many women find a little mystery to be sexy. If you are constantly messaging with a female, some of the intrigue is lost (probably for both parties). Have something up your sleeve because after a while, small talk doesn’t cut it.
So if you have been messaging a woman for awhile and find yourself asking the same questions (or not progressing), take some time out. Maybe this will turn the tables and she’ll be the one chasing you.
4. You might not actually be interested in this girl and it shows.
Usually, guys will just talk to any girl so that they can feel that they are “killing it with the ladies” (so to speak). If you are not genuinely interested in a girl, put it to rest before the conversation self-destructs.
However, if you are genuinely interested, man up and ask the girl on a date; don’t just wait until the weekend, hoping she will walk through the doors of the nightclub where you’re hanging out.
And, ladies: You never know what a guy may have to offer. Consider it a missed opportunity if you leave him hanging.
Originally appeared at Elite Daily
Photo Elite Daily
About the author: Samuel Waller. Sam is an ambitious young male, who enjoys to write articles on a range of topics. A Law Student and Gym Owner his interests are vast, leading him to write on a number of topics from News and Current Affairs to Lifestyle and Women. He loves to travel and is always looking for ways to increase his exposure to the world around him. Sam is a dreamer and believes nothing is impossible and looks forward to offering his insights to his generation.
ah.. how to play games in 4 easy steps.
If someone wishes to not text me back, then thats their choice. I do not read anything into it except that we’re not a good fit. I’d prefer a text back saying that, but we rarely get what we want these days. If someone is genuinely interested in me it will be clear…. if not… its too much work to try to sell myself to someone who isn’t interested in buying.
How is this even an article? The comment posters have more insight than the thing that was published, which offers nothing of value (unless the target audience is 13 year olds…?)
the only point that has a grain of truth to it is Point #1. being asked out to do something different that aligns with a my interests sounds great, but the rest – total rubbish. if a guy plays hard to get to try to ‘get’ me i run the other way. if a guy holds himself back to try to be ‘mysterious’ i run the other way.
Why I don’t text back:
1. I don’t like you.
2. You’re boring me.
3. You didn’t ask me a question or say anything I can respond to.
4. I think you’re gross.
Might be more interesting and entertaining to make a similar list for sexting…. Being bombarded with penises: I like penises as much as anyone, but when it rains penises, it resembles that scene from Brave Heart where the archers unleash their arrows – you just don’t know where to turn! Too much information: no close up shots of penises. Three feet away via a mirror is the most flattering I find. Mystery: use props, conceal portions, cast shadows, and be creative with your penis shot. Interest: don’t send me someone else’s penis. That is rude and shows you have no… Read more »
1 and 4 are pretty sensible, really. 1 is annoying as I find that often women expect more effort in your responses that they put into theirs (to some degree, I mirror the length and level of detail they put into their previous one, but I suppose that isn’t really doing me any favours either), but it’s a fact of life all the same.
4 – yeah, texting for me is a bit teen. Ultimately should really just call.
I agree with other commenters saying this article doesn’t seem to fit on GMP. I’m disappointed in it as well, and think that for the most part it’s stereotypical and gamey, and shows the author doesn’t really know as much about women as he thinks.
I’ve heard that boys have cootees, also. That could be reason # 5, although i think it’s a bit too well thought out for this list.
I’m one of these women who do not reply to texts from guys and actually, these are none of my reasons why. Just a bit about me – I’m 28, female and well-educated. I get texts all the time from the male gender! Here’s my actual list: – Calling and or showing up/stopping by at my office or place has more value to me. It’s evidence that you are willing to invest effort in a relationship or caring about my life :). – Texts from males are usually received at inappropriate hours, indicating you’ve been drinking and these same words… Read more »
I’m not knocking botanical gardens (I had a great afternoon in the huge one in Kopenhagen), but you must understand that many men will find that desperately boring? You can be a great person and still find nothing interesting about plants. For example, I am a mathematician. I have resigned myself many years ago that I will never be able to talk about my job with my girlfriend or any other woman. It’s just a subject that makes everybody fall asleep or run away. But I don’t hold it against them, that would be silly.
For the record, I love plants and maths.
And yet STILL not rolling in tail -_-
😉
#4 is intriguing, and would deserve an article of its own. The rest is run-of-the-mill stereotype stuff, although from a pragmatic point of view, #1 cannot be denied.
This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever read…. make a good impression in person… just be yourself…… if you need to play games to get a girl’s attention, you’re both playing and being selfish … all that ‘be mysterious’ is absolute bull.
again with the “be yourself”
this is the worst piece of “advice” that men get. men need to improve themselves & figure out what women are attracted to. & it’s usually not some guy who does zero effort because he believed the deceitful advice to just “be yourself”.
Or the most important/obvious point of all – She’s just not that into you! Point 1 was quite good but if I’m not interested in you, planning an ultimate dream first date isn’t going to help. Probably the least insightful article I have read on the GMP. I agree b with DAS
This seriously made me cringe, perhaps because I used to be the kind of woman that would fall for this crap out of a misguided sense of wanting to prove my worth to a guy who isn’t validating it. These days, having matured (at least somewhat) and knowing self-worth and validation is something I gift to myself, this sort of behavior from a guy would ring alarm bells that ring of a level of maturity that doesn’t match what I’m looking for. Perhaps I would be tempted to play the game, but in the end I would choose not to… Read more »
“I used to be the kind of woman that would fall for this crap ”
evidence that this works.
UGH. I read Good Men Project for thoughtful views from the other side. I don’t always agree, but it is generally enlightening. This article is utter crap, totally not up to GMP standards. I’m glad to know it originated elsewhere, but am mystified by the editorial decision to re-post here. This is how you lose credibility, and ultimately, readership. Please be more discerning in the future. and also… from a woman’s point of view… sometimes, I don’t text back because you’ve given me nothing to reply to. If you haven’t asked a question that needs a response, you very well… Read more »
Point 1 is right on the money. 2 is utter bullshit. 3 almost gets there in that small talk is lame. The weather is not that interesting, and if it’s the only thing we have in common, neither are you. 4 is on the money again.
This is almost as silly as The Rules for women. Be aloof, huh. How about this: find someone you genuinely click with and be yourself.
“be yourself” is bad advice & guys should know that.
Ehrm.
No.
I’m a simple guy. I don’t like mysteries or surprises. If you want a guy who’s mysterious, sweeps you off your feet, giving you tantric sex on demand and curves your for being attention greedy, you can go snuggle with 007. oO, that’s right. He left you again for another “mission” (read ho’) in another “timezone”
Simple guys! FTW
are you seriously scoffing at women wanting a man who “sweeps you off your feet, “??
you sound like you will be forever in the friendzone.
being yourself will get you nowhere. you have to become the man that women find attractive.
American dude calling women whores. Misogynists as always. Check.
you were bad in bed?
Elite daily is definitely not the voice of Generation Y. I am part of Generation Y, and virtually nothing on that execrable website is inline with my values.
Agreed. Elite Daily is garbage and 99% link bait. The writers consistently express empty stereotypes, hastily thrown together lists, and superficial, low self-worth advice.
The Good Men Project is in another league entirely. GMP stands for everything ED is not. I hope to see minimal to zero Elite Daily articles at GMP.