Photographer Jeremy Cowart was surprised when actor John Schneider asked for a different kind of photo. The reason he asked is even more surprising.
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I recently got asked to shoot photos for a show called “The Haves and HaveNots” for the Oprah Winfrey Network. I’ve shot many shows in my career and I always enjoy these shoots because there are so many challenges involved.
There’s tons of “talent”—aka celebrities—involved, all their teams, all the hair, makeup and wardrobe involved, there’s very limited time, there are tons of shots to create, there’s an immense pressure to “nail” the creative concept and obviously there is usually lots of money involved. These are high budget, high-pressure shoots. It’s diving into the deep end for sure, as far as photography is concerned. And I love that challenge. I love stepping up to the plate and going for the homerun.
But one of the things I don’t love about these shoots is that I never really get to connect with the people I’m shooting. They’re in and out in minutes. Sometimes I literally am only able to take a few pictures before they’re wisked away.
This is one of those very few rare occasions where I was able to connect. And I have my subject to thank for allowing me into his story.
♦◊♦
One of the cast members was John Schneider. You might know him from his work on “Dukes of Hazard” or “Smallville”. John was one of my many subjects that day and like the rest of the cast, he was extremely professional, humble and a lot of fun to work with. He was killing his portraits… smiling, goofing off and he even threw in several impressions of famous actors and presidents. I was very impressed by his talent and good-natured humor. You can see some of those portraits on my website.
Towards the end of his session, we brought in one of the female cast members to interact with. They were dancing, laughing and having a great time. Again, I was very impressed by his ability to light up the camera and have a good time.
Once we wrapped up his session, the female walked off set and John came to me and whispered in my ear “Hey can you sneak a few more portraits of me?” and I said “Sure of course.” He said, “There’s something going on and I just need a photo.”
This was too real. It didn’t feel right to keep shooting.
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So I grabbed my camera again and John walked back on set.
He immediately began weeping. Legitimately crying. He was so good at impressions that I thought this was another impression and I thought “wow, what an acting talent.”
Finally, I put my camera down. This was too real. It didn’t feel right to keep shooting.
So I walked up to him and hugged him.
He whispered in my ear “My Dad died about an hour ago. I found out during our lunch break. And I wanted you to capture that for me.”
Then he walked up to my screen, looked at the portraits and pointed to the last one and said “That’s it. That’s my Dad.”
“I’m so sorry,” I said. I was stunned. Shocked. And deeply moved, obviously. I didn’t want to ask any further questions out of respect.
John took off shortly thereafter to go back home to plan the next steps with his family.
I’ve since received official permission from John to share this story and these portraits with you. I will never forget this moment. And I want to thank John for inviting me into his story, even just for a moment and for allowing me to capture this for him.
As a father myself, I wept for him. We all did that day.
Editor’s note: When preparing this article for reprint, John Schneider approved the use of these images, but more importantly wanted to add this statement about his father: “There is a hole in New York where my father used to be.“
Photos: Jeremy Cowart
This story first appeared at JeremyCowart.com.
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The motives of others are difficult to know. And tears can mean a lot of things.
My mother told me that when it was announced at a family gathering that her father had died suddenly in an accident (she was 17), she burst into tears and ran into her bedroom. Everyone assumed she was grief-stricken but she told me she was crying with relief because he’d been abusing her.
I was touched by Jeremy Cowart’s account of what happened but I can understand why others might be skeptical.
I know everyone thinks grief is black and white, but it’s not. People go into shock. People do weird things. I’ve had a lost of death in the past year, and every one is different. When I saw my Grandma pass, I actually went back to work after I left the hospice – I just needed to see something normal, to process. To tell someone what had happened. I didn’t cry a lot, even though it was so sad – she had lived such a good life, and had passed on the way she wanted – I grieve not having… Read more »
Dear Lispo, I almost think you are writing MY story. I lost a cousin AND a niece this year all the while nursing my husband through lung cancer.( He is fine now). She (my cousin) and I were raised together just like sisters and even bought homes side-by-side when we got married. She was 11 months young than me. We NEVER had even one argument in 63 years. I cried literally every day for 28 WEEKS and I don’t want to let go of her EVER. I couldn’t speak her name even without tears. I even recorded her voice on… Read more »
Very nice KayMee. This is just how I feel. Grief is personal. It’s sometimes scary just how personal it is when the loss is so great. You want someone to guide you through it but only you are able to do that. This story about John Schneider was a personal glimpse into how one person dealt with grief on one afternoon. I loved it.
And Ed, I hear you. There are places so attached to people I have lost that they’ll never be the same.
Brilliant story.
“There is a hole in New York where my father used to be.“
There is a hole in San Francisco where my father used to be.
Wow-how amazing. I immediately teared up when John told you the reason he was crying. Thanks to you both for sharing such a special story.
For the people judging Mr. Schneider’s choice: Grief is very personal. On the night of my mother’s funeral, I went out to a dance club and danced for hours until my feet hurt , I was drenched in sweat, and my muscles ached. I danced for all the times my mother would never have another chance to do so. I had family call me “disrespectful” for my choice. But, it was mine to make and for me it is still a place I return to when I start missing my mother because she loved to dance. What each of us… Read more »
Thanks to both gentlemen, Mr. Cowart and Mr. Schneider for sharing this moment with us all.
A graceful and generous gesture on the part of you both.
Big fan of his from his Jonathan Kent. What a story, what a guy 🙂
Powerful stuff. I’m currently watching the Smallville series and he is a damn fine actor. Sorry for your loss, John.
I’m sorry for your loss, Mr. Schneider. I lost my father early and there are still times when I am filled with the question I meant to ask him, or awareness of some kindness her did that I only later recognized as such.
I hope that you have people around you who can offer you love and support as you go through this difficult time. Thank you for allowing Mr. Cowart to share your private, and very human moment, with us.
No one sees this as the utmost in vanity and self absorption….. his dad just died and he wants pictures of himself?
Sorry, but Im trying really hard to see the beauty here?
…luckily for you, you’ve apparently never lost someone this close then struggled to remember the depth of pain and emptiness brought on my that loss as the years pass and your memory callouses over. I choose to believe that Mr. Schneider apparently understands this deeply, fears that loss and took the opportunity to preserve his pain, lest he forget his father.
I’m with you spitfire.
And Tom, I’m sure Mr. Schneider understands self promotion more clearly than any genuine feelings.
Also “opportunity to preserve his pain, lest he forget his father” is a creepy and odd thought.
You’ve lived a charmed life or you would have some iota of understanding of the motives of a man still in shock over the loss of his father.
i’m with you spit
Or that, in the hour after his father’s death, he was showed up for a photo shoot and, turning off his emotions, was “smiling, goofing off”, “dancing, laughing and having a great time.”
Was the photoshoot so important? No one would have understood the reason he canceled?
You need to brush up on your reading skills. You are mistaken in your idea of what happened and when. In Show Business the important word is “business” , an actor is contractually obligated to appear as required. One day you will grow up and learn what commitment is all about.
You missed the point. He wanted a photo of himself to show the resemblance to his father. Your reading comprehension is as poor as your ability for compassion. Grow up!
I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Mr. Schneider on a number of occasions and he was always good natured, pleasant, kind, and generous with his time. One of the under appreciated and genuine ‘nice guys’ of Hollywood. What a great, yet bitter sweet, story.
What….a…story.
May the universe rest his soul. Namaste.
Beautiful….may I use it
John is a wonderful entertainer and actor whom I’ve admired since my childhood days of watching then current episodes of Dukes of Hazard. I wish I knew John and his father personally. Thank you for sharing with us the experience you had with him.
A man willing to not just record but share his vulnerability. A rare thing indeed.
Wow.
Wow is right.
Thanks to both you and John for sharing this.
Top calibur personality. The openness of being totally vulnerable and in the moment of honest emotion. Too ready are we to often, at these times, dismiss those moments without giving them their proper due. Bowing to the ever present pressure that the world doesn’t stop moving forward in spite of us or the for the events that transpire in our lives.