Despite parents of the you-can-be-anything-you-want persuasion, Emily Heist-Moss absorbed the misguided notion that math and science were not going to play a role in her future. Why?
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I’ve spent the last fifteen years studiously avoiding math and science. Now I’m 23 and I’m just starting to wonder why.
Other subjects, namely the ones involving words, came naturally to me, or so I thought. Every time I had the opportunity to sink my teeth into math or science as I would a classic novel or epoch of history, I shied away. I became very good at dodging math bullets. In retrospect, the pattern is near pathological, and I’ve been trying to piece together when and where this aversion started. How much of it is just how I’m wired, and how much of it comes from media exposure that promotes the message that math is hard for girls?
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I was a child in love with books. Somewhere along the line, I’d estimate 7th grade, the fact that I was good at reading and writing began to eclipse any other talents I might have developed. Advanced English and social studies classes absorbed all the energy I had for academic pursuits, and math and science were relegated to the minimum I could get away with and still get into college. I gave up on the desire to enjoy the challenge those subjects offered, partly out of the belief that I should play to my strengths. Numbers took work, while words were easy, so numbers got the axe.
In fourth grade, much to my pre-adolescent embarrassment, my dad started an afterschool math club. He brought in logic puzzles, brainteasers, and probability games to show us the “cool” side of math. That same year, after I vehemently expressed my desire to polish rocks (to what end, I’m unclear), I received a rock tumbler for Christmas. I never used it. There were numerous museum trips, faux-volcano kits, and IMAX movies about the solar system. There were books about Marie Curie and Ada Lovelace, and anthologies mythologizing other giantesses of math and science. We had a telescope in the backyard and virtually every National Geographic since 1965. I did not grow up in a science-deprived household.
Yet, when the eighth-grade math fair rolled around and my peers investigated angles in billiards or the statistical likelihood of a Boardwalk landing in Monopoly, I intentionally sought out the least math-y subject on the list: the art of M.C. Escher. In high school, I dodged calculus by taking an advanced statistics class taught by a notoriously disengaged teacher. I was afraid that faced with “real” math (like calculus), I wouldn’t do as well as a kid as smart as me was supposed to do.
And then, in college, at an institution that prides itself on providing a high-quality liberal arts education, I wiggled out of heavy-duty math yet again. I picked a class on number theory, which sounded sufficiently wordy to my uneducated ears. To everyone’s surprise, most of all my own, I rocked that class. For the first time in a math class, I was the kid who ruined the curve. My instructor circled my midterm grade and wrote “Wow!!!”; I emailed a picture of that comment to my parents. I started to wonder where I ever got the idea I was bad at math.
I’m done with school, and I’ve never taken calculus. At each fork in the academic road, I opted out of tough math and science classes. I thought that math didn’t “come naturally” to me and the challenge it offered was one I wasn’t interested in confronting. The truth is that I played it safe.
The other undeniable truth is that math is presented in pop culture as particularly challenging and unappealing to girls. This week the internet lost its collective shit over a JCPenny t-shirt that has since been discontinued. The shirt reads, in sparkly letters, “I’m too pretty to do homework so my brother has to do it for me.” You can still purchase a different tee with a big “My Best Subjects” and checkboxes with “boys,” “music,” “shopping” and “dancing.” Forever 21 sells magnets that say “Too Pretty for Math.” My parents would never have bought this crap for me, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t see it and absorb it growing up. In 1992, when I was five, Mattel released the Teen Talk Barbie that uttered, among other things, “Math class is tough!” Thankfully, my parents didn’t buy me this either.
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The notion that professions that emphasize empathy don’t “come naturally” to boys is just as damaging as suggesting that professions emphasizing logic, analytical skills and technological prowess aren’t “natural” fits for girls.
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Despite parents of the you-can-be-anything-you-want persuasion, even I absorbed the misguided notion that math and science were not going to play a role in my future. Many girls (and boys) aren’t interested in math and science, and I’m not suggesting we push them all into trigonometry classes just to prove a point. But, to pretend that boys and girls receive the same societal encouragement about career opportunities and intellectual strengths would be factually incorrect. Remember the running joke from Meet the Parents about Greg being a “male nurse?” How many parents would react with delight when their daughters majored in nursing, but concern if their sons pursued the same thing? The notion that professions that emphasize empathy don’t “come naturally” to boys is just as damaging as suggesting that professions emphasizing logic, analytical skills and technological prowess aren’t “natural” fits for girls.
I’m shifting into a new role at work, one which straddles the border between math-and-science land, where I’m a newcomer, and communication-land, where I’m a local. I should be excited and flattered about this new opportunity, but I’m anxious. What if I can’t do it? What if I don’t learn it as quickly as I should? What if I look dumb in a room full of (all male) tech-savvy software developers? What if they look at me and they know I’ve never taken calculus? Why didn’t it occur to me ten years ago that someday I might want to work in an industry in which math and science are the building blocks? Did I overhear Barbie saying math class was tough?
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This post is republished on Medium.
As a high functioning autistic who was autistic before there was a word for it, math was something I was good at, yet because in high school I couldn’t show the work the way the teacher taught it, I got D’s and F’s.
That turned me off to math forever and I’m going back to finish my BS in Psychology with an emphasis in autism, I cringe having to take math.
http://www.notweirdjustautistic.com/?s=math+what+if
Definitely not my strong point but I’ve seen both women and men who do well. More times than not I think it is the way it is taught instead of math itself that determines the success of the one learning.
With math, both male and female are avoiding math in the United States. We as a society, keep giving all kids the message ” math is tough” and the students in college and high school, avoid it like it’s poison. Girls especially avoid it, because of the stigma of unattractive nerd, boys will only like you, if you’re not too smart, it’s not cool in the girls social group in school to like math. As far as spatial reasoning and math ability, there is no real evidence of math & spatial being easier for men and boys. We have to… Read more »
I hate to be the trollish literalist once again, but you can’t actually be anything you want to be. No one can. I daresay you shouldn’t be allowed to be or encouraged to be literally absolutely anything you want to be. (Ted Bundy was quite self-confident and self-assured. No problems with self-esteem there.) No one should be discouraged from pursuing knowledge because of any stupid arbitrary reasons. I agree that people are often needlessly discouraged too early from some subjects that they might actually have an aptitude for. Sometimes it’s just the approach, or it’s timing. Some subjects you just… Read more »
There are studies that show that children who receive too much of a certain type of praise (i.e. “You are so good at writing! You are so smart!” rather than “You worked really hard on that!”) grow up to be risk-averse people who are unwilling to try anything they think they might not succeed at. So it might not have anything to do with math at all, but how your brain was wired by the well-meaning adults in your life during your formative years (not that I want to give the MRAs on this thread any more ammunition…)
I love this post. Clearly, it raises questions about natural ability vs. learned ability (or disability), as well as male vs. female brains. There are so many variables that it is pretty tricky to figure out what is going on, but these types of questions help raise the questions, that ultimately lead to discoveries.
Whoa! Hold on there Emily…My son is a Registered Nurse and his old man (me) is thrilled for him. And he is Not exactly soft or empathetic in his duties. He works on a ward filled with drug abusers, violent criminals and street derelicts who really don’t deserve the care they get. Additionally, he is a highly qualified scuba (technical) diver doing deep dives requiring decompression and an extensive knowledge of mixing gases for different types of dives. His latent math ability is now fully engaged. As a nurse he is able to gauge oxygen needs of his patients utilizing… Read more »
Wow, Jim, thanks for your response! Your son is lucky to have your support and I wish all parents were so proud of their kids’ professional choices!
Check this out if you actually believe girls are worse at math than boys: http://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2011/09/02/does-biology-explain-why-there-are-so-few-women-in-computer-science/
Blows the sterotype out of the water.
Elizabeth, I LOVED this. Thanks for calling it out!
Okay, some thoughts after sleeping on this. 1. I have no idea what your new job is, and yet I’d bet you $20 sight unseen that nobody gives a flying anything whether or not you know calculus. Calculus was probably not in the job description. Actually doing calculus regular isn’t even in the job description for a lot of- maybe even most- engineers. Sitting around doing a lot of calculus by hand is expensive so a lot of calculus-intensive analysis is done by computers while the engineers are mainly there to find accurate input data, set parameters intelligently, choose the… Read more »
I think this tee-shirt is meant to be a bit of a joke – I mean, what are boys who aren’t good at math supposed to wear? “I’m too hunky to be good at math!” It isn’t funny when the message is taken seriously or slips into the subconscious obviously.
Not many people are good at math – male or female – even our professional financiers often can’t add and subtract it seems hence the economic mess we’re in.
Far more disturbing is the message that pretty girls simply can’t think. That’s look-ism.
I’ve written a few blogs (at http://www.princessfreezone.com) that address much of what is said in this piece. I think a lot of these issues are rooted in how girls are treated from a young age (JC Penney’s tee is one example). One of my blogs is called “Encouraging Girls to Tinker” which discusses the differences between the way we talk and engage with boys when they’re young and how we treat girls. Is every girl going to end up a scientist or mathematician as a result? No. But they might be able to fix a leaky faucet!
Either nature, nurture, or a combination of these is a possibility for the larger question of why girls don’t tend to favor math. That goes without saying. But I think that in an effort to dismantle the nature argument, people go to far in the other direction by saying that the explanation for gender differences in mathematical ability is fully rooted in sociability. This is a very unscientific “God in the Gaps”-like argument which leaves us little room to prove or disprove the hypothesis. That being said, the article wasn’t bad; I’m just wondering why it is posted on The… Read more »
Good fathers care about issues that may affect their daughters’ education.
fair enough, though i can’t recall seeing any writers here take up boys’ poor school performance and the college education gap where women make up 57% of the college degree-seekers. correct me if i’m wrong though.
to me, this article seemed less like an appeal to parents to understand how raising daughters affects their preference for math and more like a sounding post for a young woman speaking up about her struggles with the subject. and while this is not necessarily a “masculist” blog, there are plenty of feminist blogs that handle that subject matter.
You’re right, there there is no concern about the gender education gap expressed here because GMP is largely a feminist lead site. I haven’t ever seen a feminist blog or website that raises any serious concern over the gender education gap.
Perhaps there is little concern because it has had no affect on male outcomes. When women have to get a PHD to get equal pay to a man with a bachelors, what education gap is there to discuss?
You’re comparing apples to tomatoes. Men work longer hours on average, are more career-oriented on average, and enter jobs that are more stressful, on average. Even within fields – such as MD’s – men opt for more difficult positions like cardiologist while women opt for pediatrics. Again, in general, but these generalities explain the general differences in pay.
No, I’m not. When accounting for all of those things, women are still paid less. Also, non-whites are paid less than white and lighter skinned counterparts. Do they also enter jobs that are less stressful?
http://www.consad.com/content/reports/Gender%20Wage%20Gap%20Final%20Report.pdf DK: this is the largest most comprehensive survey ever done. If I remember correctly this reports states that when women’s choices are controlled for the disparity between the sexes dwindle to: 4.8 to 7.1 less in earnings. Excerpt: “thereby leave an adjusted gender wage gap that is between 4.8 and 7.1 percent. These variables include: A greater percentage of women than men tend to work part-time. Part-time work tends to pay less than full-time work. A greater percentage of women than men tend to leave the labor force for child birth, child care and elder care. Some of the… Read more »
That’s the first time I’ve heard that lack of education has no affect on one’s outcome. So why bother to send boys to school at all? Think of all the money that would be saved.
The reality is that they don’t care about boy’s outcomes, including minority boys, whose high school drop out rates are the worst and the where the education gender gap gap is the widest.
I’m glad you bring up the race/class gap because the darker one’s skin is, the more education one needs to match the wages of a whites. Much like women require more education to match the wages of men. That is the gap of concern.
Really? Dark-skinned Indians earn less than whites when controlling for education?
But to your question, directly: http://www.jbhe.com/news_views/55_closing_the_income_gap.html As of 2004 at least, according to the Journal of Black Higher Education reporting on Census figures, the median black with a Master’s degree earned 98% of what non-Hispanic whites with Master’s degrees earned. Blacks with doctorate degrees actually earned more than whites with doctorates. On bachelor’s degrees – black women with bachelor’s degrees earned more than white women with bachelor’s degrees. The largest disparity is that between white men and black men with bachelor’s – with the former earning about $50,000 and the latter earning $40,000. That could be explained in part by… Read more »
Life is about more than money. Everyone should get a decent education for many reasons, job prospects being an important reason but only one of a number of important reasons.
The feminist claim to be for equality is proved untrue by their indifference to the fact that boys graduate 10% behind girls in high school and 14% in college. I am not saying that it’s their responsibility to care or do anything about it; I’m just pointing out that they don’t care, and that equality is not their objective.
Perhaps there is little concern because it has had no affect on male outcomes. When women have to get a PHD to get equal pay to a man with a bachelors, what education gap is there to discuss? The education gap that shows girls are outperforming boys in most measured metrics (class, race, etc…). Sure it would be nice to address that pay gap but surely the education gap is worth addressing too right? Or is the only concern to make sure women get fair pay (yes its a valid concern but by no means is it the only worthwhile… Read more »
You have your argument backwards. Scientific studies that show that the gender disparity in math is social and regional, not natural. Falling back on nature to fill in the gaps is unscientific.
Please post a link to the studies you are referring to.
Here’s one that came out just recently – http://www.livescience.com/15823-culture-gender-gap-spatial-abilities.html
Thank you but can you post a link to one that deals with math? That one deals with spatial ability. Spatial ability and math ability are not synonymous.
From a very cursory search:
http://www.scientificamerican.com/podcast/episode.cfm?id=no-gender-gap-in-math-10-01-06
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/06/090601182655.htm
Thank you. I don’t believe that boys are natually better at math any more than I believe that girls mature faster than boys or read and write better naturally. However, being good at something and enjoying it are not the same. I think the difference may lie in what they enjoy and thus choose to focus on.
Excerpt from the study: “While the gender gap in math performance seems to be narrowing, Hyde and Mertz caution that the United States may fall further behind other nations in math performance as tests mandated by No Child Left Behind include almost no questions requiring complex problem-solving.” And yet test results from NCLB were used as part of the data to prove girls were doing as well as boys. If you set the bar low, of course disparities will disappear as all seem to do well. Also, the article states that there continue to be disparities at the high end,… Read more »
i feel i should point out that that study found that in patrilineal tribes men were 36% faster and in matrilineal tribes men and women scored equally. if as you postulate the difference in spatial abilities is cultural wouldn’t you expect the women to be faster in the matrilineal tribes. I find your link interesting but inconclusive.
Not only that but throwing out test scores (CRCT, ITBS, ect.) and constantly parroting that girls are doing more poorly in math and science than boys isn’t helpful either. There was one study done where both boys and girls took a standardized test. There were two subject groups. One group (the girls) was told that girls scored more poorly in math and science. The other group wasn’t told anything. With the latter group, there was little disparity between the math and science scores of boys and girls. With the former group, there was. The boys inevitably did better.
It’s wonderful that you were able to discover your “math brain” and clearly you have aptitude for math and wonderful parents who tried to make math fun. There are people who suffer from a real Math Anxiety that can be determined at a young age (http://www.pragmaticmom.com/?p=17901). But I agree with you about the ridiculousness of the JC Penny T Shirts; telling young girls that math is for boys is precluding them from a world of high paying jobs, to say the least. I blog extensively about math for kids and parents. I truly think it’s important to do what your… Read more »
It sounds like you are doing what you want to do. So, evidently you can still be anything you want to be. You admittedly didn’t want to take those math classes, and chose not to. Now you are faced with a career opportunity involving math, which you seem enthused about. So, again, it’s what you want to do. If you choose to do a night class in calculus so as to excel at your job, it will be because it’s what you “want” to do. I had the same experience (more about that in the last paragraph) I encourage my… Read more »
Barbie can do math just fine. Just ask her: http://coffeewithhallelujah.blogspot.com/2011/07/paleontologist-barbies-raison-detre.html