If you’re sitting on the fence about chasing a dream, a fitness goal, a girl, traveling across the world, or starting that dream business–take a chance.
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People claim perfection doesn’t exist. They state it’s only a fantasy. For a brief period back in college, I was witnessing perfection.
I took life’s leftovers and lived through others.
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Besides working on my fitness, heading to the school gym allowed me to be in the same arena as my crush. Equipped with a glowing smile, flawless skin, mesmerizing eyes, and beautiful hair–her radiance swept me in at first sight.
Time ceased to exist, exams were an afterthought, and worries were galaxies away.
This was more than a crush. This was the most beautiful girl I’d ever seen in my life. An Oscar worthy romantic comedy was brewing in my mind.
Unfortunately, I forgot to do the most important thing–take a chance. At the time, courage and confidence weren’t words associated with my name.
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If Noah Calhoun (Ryan Gosling in The Notebook) and Jack Dawson (Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic) were the definitions of courage and confidence–I was the opposite. I was timid, afraid of the unknown, and the king of waiting until tomorrow.
Those characteristics weren’t only for seeing the girl of my dreams–they manifested into every aspect of my life.
I told myself I couldn’t be a writer. Instead, I played it safe and collected degrees (and debt). I took life’s leftovers and lived through others who were going after what they wanted.
Reflecting on those times, I’ve learned some powerful lessons that have shaped me into the man that I am today.
If you’re sitting on the fence about chasing a dream, a fitness goal, a girl, traveling across the world, or starting that dream business—take a chance. Here are five lessons on why you should stop waiting and take a chance.
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1. You’ll never get what you want out of life sitting on the sidelines
If you wait for magical moments to fall into your lap, you’ll only get the leftovers of what everyone else doesn’t want. Your dreams, goals, physique, or anything else won’t happen unless you enter the playing field.
Sitting on the sidelines leads to spectating instead of being an active participant in your life. All the ideas and plans in the world mean little unless you take the initiative.
2. Accept that risks are an everyday part of life
Rejection may happen. Rough patches within your business may occur. You might hit a plateau with your fitness.
Chasing your dreams and following the road less traveled is scary at times, but that’s the point. If you aren’t scared a little about your dreams and goals–the moment isn’t big enough. Feel free to dream a little bigger.
The worst that can happen from taking a risk is a potential setback or feeling of unease. However, setbacks and feelings don’t last forever. It’s only permanent when you choose to quit and not pick yourself up to fight another day.
If you decide not to take risks, what will happen? Nothing and that’s a guarantee. Take a chance and see what can happen.
3. Don’t let the what ifs stop you
- What if I can’t lose weight?
- What if my business fails?
- What if she doesn’t feel the same way that I feel about her?
- What if my writing is terrible?
- What if I can’t live my dream life and travel the world?
These thoughts have crept into my mind at some point (and still do at times). The self-doubt is with us at all times, especially when we’re trying to grow as individuals and stretch outside our comfort zones. Instead of letting the “what ifs” cripple us, let’s turn the “what ifs” into a positive.
Here is what that would look like.
What if you can lose weight? Think about the confidence you’ll gain along with improved health.
What if your business succeeds? Think about how transformative your life will become.
What if she feels the same way that you feel about her? Think about the amazing relationship that you’ll have.
What if you write that book? Think about the impact you’ll provide to the world through your words and experiences.
What if your dream life becomes a reality and you travel the world? Think about the inspiration you’ll provide to others. Think about the amazing people you’ll meet.
4. Keep moving forward (no matter what)
What you’re trying to go after might feel impossible. The odds seem stacked against you. Your friends and family might call you crazy. Who cares? This is your life.
Each of us is here to make our unique dent in the universe, experience life to its fullest, and leave a legacy.
No matter how many times you hit a setback and no matter if it takes three jobs to pursue your dreams–don’t give up. Your breakdowns will become your breakthroughs.
Regret seduces us into playing the wishing game.
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Your dreams and aspirations deserve your attention and love–not fear and self-doubt. If you’ve lost hope and feel defeated, dust off those dreams, and get back to work (one small step at a time).
Our dreams never go away; we just decide to ignore them.
5. Don’t let your past regrets define you
Regret is a sickening feeling. In fact, it’s the worst feeling in the world. It’s a stomachache that medicine can’t cure.
Regret reminds us at the most inopportune times of what could’ve been, had we taken a chance.
Regret seduces us into playing the wishing game. Regret pulls us out of the present moment and into the past, only to leave us anxious.
However, the past is irreversible and out of our control while the future is still within our power to shape. Who knows what can happen.
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The world is full of infinite possibilities once you put yourself out there. You are the captain of your life, not anyone else.
Embrace your opportunities and don’t wait for tomorrow because anything is possible when you take a chance.
Now it’s your turn. What’s the one thing in your life that you want to take a chance with, but haven’t made the leap yet? Comment below and let’s get you started on taking a chance and stop waiting.
You can see more of Julian’s writing at theartoffitnessandlife.com
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Photo: 1290174526
I hate my currant job. I’ve been trying to start a real estate investment business for a few years. Been struggling getting traction. Became divorced 5 years ago and currently live with my daughter and son-in-law.
I just want to do something fresh and new. I also would love a wonderful woman in my life.
Beautiful piece. Keep spreading your magic. I loved the entire article. Being bold and fearless is laced with beauty and magic. It’s often taking that very first and initial step that is the hardest. Much love to you.
While reading this article…there was just one person in my mind…i know..i have to move on…i am infact doing well in my career path…but still..moments when i am alone…while in a bus..going on walks…few moments before going to sleep…this one person always comes in mind…but i am not in contact with him….please just tell me..one thing…should i or should i not pursue him?…if we want something then we only have to work for it…but..if something it meant for….it will be…….what should i do?
Do one night stand as many as possible….. And fuck that shit person who makes trouble in your life…….Get out of it Right now. Be a lady and be proud of it.
Starting my own business….as a single parent with a mortgage , it’s risky to do this with the possibility of losing your home if things don’t work out
I agree with everything, but collecting degrees is not avoiding taking risk in life for many of us. Chasing my dream to earn a PhD was a huge risk for me, and my peers. Anything pursued at the exclusion of a balanced life is unhealthy.
Thank you so much for sharing the article. You have little to no idea what you have done to me. You’d have done someone like me a great disservice had you held back from writing and sharing this masterpiece. I would have paid you more than a 1000 dollars had I that much. Someday, you’ll know.
This couldn’t have come at a better time. I want to start a business but I get too anxious when I have to approach people. Social anxiety has been at the heart of my lack of moving forward and creating the life I want to build. Every day is a work in progress. Thanks for the article!
Hey Amanda, it’s awesome that you’re taking this huge leap. Fear is a natural part of the equation, it’ll always be with us no matter what endeavors we go for. Uncertainty is a natural part of the equation as well, but most importantly, by taking the leap, you won’t look back with a bunch of “what ifs & I shoulds”. If it doesn’t work out, at least you can look back and say “oh well”. That sounds much better that the other scenario. Stay positive & persistent on this new adventure of yours and it’ll work out in its own… Read more »
Yes! All of these! I recently decided to sell most of my belongings and pack up the rest to move from the only place I have ever called home, to go live nearly 3k miles from everyone I know and love. I know barely a soul where I am going and I am scared I will “fail”. I am scared I won’t make friends. I am scared I won’t find a good job. I am scared I won’t find a place that feels homey and I can afford like my current apartment. I am scared my parents won’t be here… Read more »
I’ve been weight training more consistently and with more intensity than almost anyone I know, yet I’ve never had the “balls” to diet and compete. I spend an inordinate amount of time reading and thinking about training and physiques. Also this year I was made redundant at work, and have come to the conclusion (partly thru a lack of formal employment and partly thru a sense that it is the right thing to do) that I should be working for myself. I’m an environmental consultant, and most of my formal employment has in fact trained me for this very thing.… Read more »
That’s awesome to hear Samantha, being scarred to me serves as an indication that what you’re chasing is something worthwhile and rewarding on the other side of that fear. Competing is definitely something that takes discipline, but if it’s done in a safe and sustainable way, it’s highly rewarding.
“If you wait for magical moments to fall into your lap, you’ll only get the leftovers of what everyone else doesn’t want”. Very true! Great thoughts, in this article.
Thank you Emilie, glad you enjoyed the article!
Hi Julian,
I aim to publish my own writing. Thank you for yet another challenge to ‘just do it.’ I’ve lived a long life of standing on wharves watching ships sail without me, often knowing I would have been a better sailor than many of the crew who went. But self doubt’s a bigger bastard than self belief and hard to shift once let in through mind’s door. I’m working on it.
Hey Anthony,
Awesome to hear this! Congrats on taking the leap to publishing your own writing. Self doubt is totally a bastard, but it’s not strong enough to hold us back from something we really want. As long as you’re moving forward each day toward that goal however small it may feel, you’re one step closer to reaching that goal and being the “lead sailor” instead of a spectator.