Shawn Maxam explains how he used negative life experiences to make better choices. Choices that has helped him create a positive self-identity.

I believe there’s no proverb but what is true; they are all so many sentences and maxims drawn from experience, the universal mother of sciences.

-Miguel de Cervantes

So much of who we are as human beings is questioned and maligned. I walk around with labels given to me by others to describe how I am different from them. Many of these qualities are perceived as negatives. I didn’t choose most of these characteristics.

I am a Black male. I have Bipolar Disorder. I was raised by an immigrant single-mother. See the pattern developing. I was either born this way or born into circumstances that made me this way. The first choice I ever made in my life was when I was 18. I chose to become an atheist. Even that has led me to be further marginalized in this society.

I no longer see the point in seeking acceptance because I wouldn’t know what that looks like. The only thing I can do now is to engage in healthy behaviors that are inspired by healthy thoughts. Anything and anyone who isn’t healthy in my life I will remove to the best of my ability. Of course there are constraints to doing this but I have faith in myself. I have reflected and I am now ready to move forward. Below is some of what I have learned.

A list of Maxam’s maxims:

Arrogance is only myopic confidence.

Perfection only exist when you fail to acknowledge flaws.

Reason is rational thought combined with life experience.

Love is tangible compassion.

Intolerance is misinformed belief.

Habit is shorthand for behavioral shortcomings

Regret is guilt reminding you of the past.

Shame is your inability to meet the expectations of others.

Logic is thinking within the context of information and possibility.

We repeat patterns because routines feel safer even if they are incrementally self-destructive.

We rationalize because it make us feel better about bad choices than excuses.

We hope because the truth means we have to accept responsibility.

We project only because we want to self-protect.

We assume because it is more difficult to ask.

What have you learned? Feel free to continue the discussion.

Read more Shawn Maxam here.

Please share this with friends, enemies and temporary allies alike.

Thanks for reading, sharing and commenting!

R.I.P. SKH