The Worst Day of Our Lives: 07.22.06

Shawn Maxam reflects on the impact his younger brother’s death has had on him and his family.

You can shed tears that she is gone, 
or you can smile because she has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she’ll come back,
or you can open your eyes and see all she’s left.
Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her,
or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, 
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember her only that she is gone,
or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind, 
be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what she’d want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

-David Harkins

There’s always a piece of sadness that follows you around like a shadow when a person you love deeply is violently taken away from you. The grief never ends. The intensity may dip at times but it is always everlasting. Every family holiday, celebration, graduation, wedding and so forth are tainted by their absent.

The only person who can help you cope with the pain is you. My brother, who died six years ago today, had a different relationship with every member of his family so we all cope with the loss in our own way.

The farther away that his death drifts into the past the more present it becomes in my mind. The older I become the younger I realize he was. The more success I have the more bittersweet the taste in my mouth. Every joke masks the tears inside. Crying is so draining. I don’t wish an untimely death on anyone. Every man is someone’s brother or son.  Rest In Peace Shawnel Kenneth Hyde.

Thanks for reading, sharing and commenting!

R.I.P. SKH

 

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About S. Maxam

I am writer and blogger who discusses the intersectionality of mental illness, race, and masculinity. I also write about resilience, agency and self- empowerment. I am also a dual-degree graduate student studying social work, social policy and the law. I am a Brooklyn native and also a huge fan of my wife - Kijan.
Connect with me on either Twitter or Facebook
R.I.P. SKH

Comments

  1. Rest In Peace to your brother

  2. Anonymous says:

    I LOVE THIS! R.I.P SHAWNEL. :(

Trackbacks

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