Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important.
My great concern is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with your failure.
Motivation differs for everyone. Whether it is wealth, family, religion or any other variable human beings usually use external factors to inspire themselves. I am a huge fan and believer in developing intrinsic motivational factors. Ownership of your life’s outcomes is very important in the cultivation of a mentality that success is a top priority. Institutions ( i.e. churches), ideologies (i.e. capitalism) and people (i.e. family or spouses) are not usually stable enough to build this framework. Who you are and what you believe in at twenty years old isn’t the same who and what at thirty-five or fifty-five etc. It is emotionally reckless to not protect your mental health and well-being from the uncertainties of life.
The method in which I motivate myself are from the experiences of near-death. Regardless of whether or not you agree or disagree with my past actions the silver lining that I gained from that ordeal is my utter lack of fear…of death. Now don’t make the mistake of believing the absence of fear means I want to die. NO! I want to live. I won’t seek death but if it comes (before I feel ready) than I will accept it. Facing death puts everything in perspective (especially when you introduced yourself to him/her).
After you fail at committing suicide there’s nowhere to go but up!
We have been conditioned by society to revel in the negative. To believe in the worst of ourselves. To develop LSED or Low Self-Esteem Disorder. We try to find failure in our greatest successes. And when we do succeed we have to pass on the credit and glory to others for fear of being called narcissistic. We chip away at our own fragile core made all the easier by the billboards, media, friends, universities, religions and governments that we have been taught to allow to influence our thoughts about ourselves.
In today’s world every opinion is valid which means no one is right and that is utter bullshit. Much of the way we see ourselves in this world is based upon archaic, antiquated and static thought-systems. I want you to revolt. Remove the shackles of expectation. Empower yourself. You have the choice to accept failure as either a reflection of yourself or to look at it as a learning tool to reflect on the process and lack of progress. Change the people, place, ideas and things impeding your growth.
I can take arguably the worst moments of my life; my brother’s death, my own suicide attempts and subsequent mood disorder diagnosis and choose to give them meaning. The experiences themselves still suck. But who I become because of those experiences can be positive. There is no grand cosmic plan for me. Those events didn’t need to happen. But I accept that they did and I move forward. My appreciation for life is directly related to my appreciation of death and the preciousness of time. Time I shall no longer waste.
Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.
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