Dude, Where’s My Condom? Levi Johnston Is A Sperm Sniper

Jamie Reidy comments on Sarah Palin’s almost-former-son-in-law’s latest score.

NJ.com writer Vicki Hyman reports that Levi Johnston’s latest girlfriend is with child.

The vexingly fecund 21-year-old almost son-in-law of Sarah Palin (and the father of her first grandson, Tripp) has reportedly impregnated his latest girlfriend, a 20-year-old teacher from his Wasilla hometown, TMZ.com reports.

Oops, he did it again.

Levi Johnston proves he cannot cover his Johnson.

If I was in my early 20s and struggling to get laid, I’d move to Wasilla, Alaska STAT.

LJ is leading the nation in impregnation.

Levi’s fantasy football team name has to be “Bareback Cowboy Riders.”

What other jokes am I missing?

Graphic by:  Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

 

About Jamie Reidy

Jamie Reidy is a writer and Propecia "before" model. His new book A Walk's As Good As A Hit: Advice/Threats from My Old Man is a collection of funny essays about him and his father. His second book Bachelor 101: Cooking + Cleaning = Closing is a cookbook/lifestyle guide for clueless single guys just like him. His book Hard Sell: Now a Major Motion Picture LOVE and OTHER DRUGS
in which Jake Gyllenhaal played "Jamie."

Comments

  1. Peter Houlihan says:

    Is it right to follow his story this closely just because he’s close to Sarah Palin? God forbid anyone I know runs for president.

  2. Anthony Zarat says:

    Attacking a politician is legitimate. Attacking the spouse of a politician is reprehensible, but at least there is some kind of “choice” (married couples make decisions jointly). Attacking the children of politicians is completely wrong and irresponsible.

    But this? A nuclear strike agtainst a private citizen who has the misfortune of being in the vicinity of a politician?

    The author should delete this post. It is wrong. Totally wrong.

    • Joanna Schroeder says:

      Levi Johnston has made a VERY conscious choice to be a public figure, Anthony. We’re not talking about her son here, who has made it clear he wants a private life, we’re talking about someone who has volunteered for many public interviews, goes to premiers (or used to), and — POSED FOR PLAYGIRL!

      Also, I’ve seen him out and about in Los Angeles at night… He’s no victim. Once he was in a cabana by a pool at midnight with literally eight young women on all sides of him and a bouncer outside the cabana (on the rooftop of the London Hotel in WeHo about 18 months ago).

      Let’s just hope he’s an actively involved and responsible father to these babies.
      He may be back in Wasilla now, but my guess is the only reason he’s back there is because Hollywood tired of him.

      • Peter Houlihan says:

        In what context did he volunteer for interviews?

        I’ve been to a premiere, does this mean my private life is up for grabs?

        Ok, so he modeled. He sold pictures, not his life story.

        If the guys promiscuous then he’s promiscuous. It doesn’t mean that its anyone else’s business but his and those women’s.

  3. Jake DiMare says:

    Last I checked this website was called the Good Men Project. Levi Johnston is a man, he’s not behaving very good, and as such his behavior is worthy of dissection.

    This is becoming too predictable…someone in connection with the Republican party demonstrates poor behavior, gets called out, and the right wing trolls come marching out to try and discredit. Don’t you guys have anything better to do?

    • Peter Houlihan says:

      Firstly, I’m not right wing. In the last election I voted labour (center left, considerably farther to the left than the US Dems).

      Secondly, one has to be a right wing troll to respect someone else’s privacy now?

  4. Larry Bernard says:

    Levi Johnston… connections to the GOP

    are you serious Jake?

    there aren’t words that exist to describe my laughter at how absurd that idea was.

    Levi got professional DNC hack Gloria Alread giving him money and attention

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