Dad and oft-times contributor to The Good Men Project Jim Mitchem shared this video on Facebook. The last word of his status update says it all:
In fact, we dare you to listen to the last line of this performance and not get the #chills.
“This is a man’s work. And I don’t care how you get it done. This is fatherhood. By any means. Necessary.”
This spoken word poem is performed by Boris Rogers as part of the Charlotte Video Project. According to the blurb on YouTube, in Body & Voice: Bluz, some of Charlotte’s best performance artists use body movement and the voice as their media — comics, poets and actors.
About the Editors
It’s ok, but the whole bit about intimidating boys who might want to be sexual with daughters is terrible. Women/girls should be allowed to control their own sexual agency, and boys should be allowed to explore it with them without fear of being beaten up.
Yeah, I always found that creepy and borderline incestuous.
At no point is it ever okay for an adult to threaten or intimidate a child. Not only is it illegal (menacing, threatening, breech of peace – it has a lot of names, but wherever you are, there’s a statute on the books criminalizing that sort of behavior), but it’s just outright immoral. Your daughter won’t die from sex. Her body is not your body. Knock that shit out.
Agree. What is it with all these dads who think their daughter is property? If they’re such great fathers, why aren’t they teaching their daughters (and sons) to make good decisions for themselves?
I actually found the whole thing agressive and lacking most things I associate with raising children. No chills, that’s for sure.
I think ya’ll are grossly misinterpreting the guy’s words. I presume you’re referring to the part where he says, “And If he ever tries to get physical with his hands, then she’ll let him know that my father, my brother, Pop Pop and Little Cease (sp?) from up the street all wanna have a little conversation with you, playboy…”
I don’t think he means, “gets physical,” as in “be sexual with,” but rather “gets physical,” as in, “performs violence against” vis-a-vis “keep your hands off [blank].”
Certainly not how I hear it, or how I would usually hear “get physical” unless there’s a context that specifically refers to conflict and violence. Also, if that’s what he meant, why use “playboy”?
You must be confused. Never in my life have I ever heard someone use the term “get physical” in a sexual context.
“Hey baby, wanna get physical?”
“Yo fellas, I got so physical with this chick the other night.”
I’m not going to get started with “playboy.” Go outside. You’ll figure it out.
Never? Really. So that classic Olivia Newton John song (w/ plenty of cover over the years) is an invitation to battery? And when men’s magazines and websites publish the “10 ways to get physical with a woman” list, that’s really hints on how to beat her up? Somehow I didn’t think so.
It’s interesting that you hear this as “protecting a kid from violence”. I’ve listened to it again, and I just don’t get that. Even if I keep your interpretation in mind, it’s not what I hear. Not sure why. Maybe it’s the gendering. It may be that “protecting my daughter against a violent boyfriend” isn’t very high on the list of things I worry about (rightly or not).
Oh – and no reason to get rude just because we disagree.
I agree Sal, I think a few people are being a bit sensitive here. It is obvious that message being conveyed is about creating the best future for your child.
I often joke to my wife about scaring off boys when my daughter reached that age. It is all banter and of course i hope she will have an extremely healthy attitude towards sex and a very fulfilling love life!
…in fact very surprised to see so many negative comments about quite a moving performance. As a dad it definitely gave me a lump in my throat. Maybe because he performs in such a masculine way it can be misinterpreted as being aggressive?
It is little wonder why men are confused these days about their role when an authentic performance like this frome a male perspective comes under such heavy criticism! comes
Sal …You are absolutely right in how you interpreted it. People need to watch it a couple of time and maybe they’ll get it?
@Lars …. Property? Hell no, my kids are more then property, they are my flesh and blood. Rob my house, take my car … I give a rats ass. Screw with my kids, now you have to deal with ME. Aggression? I didn’t hear him say anything about beating the crap out of anyone … what I heard is that the guy that screw with his daughter is gonna have to deal with daddy and it’s not going to be comfortable.
This does not apply to the fathers who were born with a sliver spoon in there mouth but to the fathers who didn’t have a dad And came from the hood and became teen parents and of sted of running away they became the father that they should of had.
Jsoto … oh yeah, it applies to all dads stepping up. Some of the references which relate to inner city may lead someone to believe that the messages just for them but it applied to all dads.
@eh …. You said “It’s ok, but the whole bit about intimidating boys who might want to be sexual with daughters is terrible. Women/girls should be allowed to control their own sexual agency, and boys should be allowed to explore it with them without fear of being beaten up.” Who said anything about being beat up?
See, this is part of the problem, people automatically think he’s talking about physical violence. Yeah, damn straight there should be some intimidation and show of potential force because that’s what a lot of kids can relate to. He didn’t say anything about beating … he said a “conversation.” He talking about stepping up, rick man or poor man.
I have a 14 year old on the unit with a new born kid … yeah, he explored and now what, a child now has to step up and be a father. Yeah …. Exploring sex is great until one of them gets hurt, until she gets pregnant, until one of them contract things like Chlamydia (7 of the 28 guys on my unit have been diagnosed with it). All for the sake of “exploring?”
p.s. should have read “my daughter reaches that age” she is only 11 months old so have some time before i have to worry about such matters
Oh and for the record i also think “getting physical with his hands” is referring aggression rather than sexuality.
Are you guys kidding me? The first 4 or so commentators sound like the kind of guys who watch too much babysitter porn. A dumbass teenaged kid should have the right to feelup your dumbass daughter without fear of you kicking his ass?
One of the biggest roles in parenting is protecting your children. It goes hand in hand with educating them on how to conduct and protect themselves. As a teacher myself, I know that sometimes even smart kids don’t learn everything the first time. In some cases, letting your kids make mistakes and re-learning the lesson the hard way is productive. Sex isn’t one of them.
About interpreting that line, perhaps the “ambiguity” is intentional. Many artists enjoy using statements with multiple possibilities as to their meaning. Perhaps it means both. To me, it’s a clearly a reference to battery, but take it however you like.
Either way that you came at my daughter, you’d suffer some.
solution, don’t have kids
First thing Monday morning I will be meeting the our in-house school staff and by the end of the day, all the guys will have watched this video.
Reminds me of the C&W song … Cleaning This Gun (Come On In Boy) – Rodney Atkins
The Declaration of Independence. Think I can tell you that first sentence.
But then I’m lost. I can’t begin to count the theories I’ve had pounded in my head that I forgot.
I don’t remember all that Spanish. Or the Gettysburg Address. But there is one speech from high school I’ll never forget
Chorus:
Well now that I’m a father. I’m scared to death one day my daughter is gonna find.
That teenage boy I used to be Who seems to have just one thing on his mind
She’s growing up so fast it won’t be long before, I’ll have to put the fear of God
Into some kid at the door.
Chorus :
Come on in boy, sit on down And tell me ’bout yourself. So you like my daughter, do you now
Yeah we think she’s something else. She’s her daddy’s girl, her mama’s world.
She deserves respect, that’s what she’ll get, ain’t it son? Now y’all run along and have some fun.
I’ll see you when you get back. Bet I’ll be up all night Still cleaning this gun
Now it’s all for show ain’t nobody gonna get hurt. It’s just a daddy thing, -n- hey, believe me, man it works
Chorus:
Come on in boy, sit on down And tell me ’bout yourself. So you like my daughter, do you now
Yeah we think she’s something else. She’s her daddy’s girl, her mama’s world.
She deserves respect, that’s what she’ll get, ain’t it son? Now y’all run along and have some fun.
I’ll see you when you get back. Bet I’ll be up all night Still cleaning this gun
Ha ha … Now son now y’all buckle up and have her back by 10, uh lets say 9…30
Drive safe