News anchor Jennifer Livingston’s response to a nasty, judgmental email she received, criticizing her for her weight, was bold. On her TV show, she called out the act as one of cyber bullying. Growing up, I didn’t have to deal with getting bullied online as well as in school. I feel especially bad for kids today for that reason.
I am a big fan of The Fat Nutritionist, a website that is linked to at the bottom of the post on this subject on Upworthy. The eponymous blogger teaches people to eat socially again, both for the cues we give and take about the food we eat, and to make normal again an act that we all must do, and most of us do several times a day and with little thought. When I was in high school, I was among the weird kids and outcasts who would take refuge during the lunch hour in a kind English teacher’s classroom. In the heydey of “The Breakfast Club,” we were a real “Lunch Club,” each of us with his or her own reason for avoiding the cafeteria. One reason to avoid eating in front of other people is because people, maybe starting with your parents, in fact, probably them first, would scrutinize what you ate, how much, and as you ate it quickly and nervously, how fast you ate it. The judgment. If your lunch was wholesome, your diet holy, then disbelief. It was regarded as a “lifestyle choice,” for sure, and though I was startled to hear Jennifer Livingston, the news anchor, say “skin color” right after “struggling with your weight” in her exhortation to the bullied, she is correct. No one in this fatphobic culture chooses to be fat. There’s nothing inherently wrong with being fat (which always surprises people to learn, but it’s true). And attempts to change this fact about oneself are usually not effective or long-lasting.
I try to avoid profanity in my posts and comments, but the self-appointed “fat police” are all assholes.
Also, in case I came across as delivering too much of a Dr. Nerdlove style “take individual responsibility and improve yourself” sermon, I also think that there are macro steps we can take to fight obesity.
Challenging the subsidization of high fructose corn syrup, for starters.
I can put on my Tin Foil Toque and we’ll be on equal footing again, each with our pet concerns. I believe in Health at Every Size, ending fatphobia, supporting local agriculture, and avoiding industrial food. Food deserts are bad for fat and thin people. And people can be fat and also perfectly healthy. I understand there’s a huge industry devoted to selling weight loss as well as selling food; I’m for exposing the inherent interests of pharmaceutical companies, bariatric specialists, and weight loss centers in keeping you a paying customer, for life. The statistics indicate most people who lose… Read more »
Just to clarify.
I am not advocating that we bash and shame fat people.
However, at the same time, I do not believe that it is desirable to somehow normalize fatness or make it seem like it’s something okay.
We should be decent towards fat people we encounter. This is simply basic manners. But we should simultaneously combat obesity in this country.
Imagine saying the same things you just said about “fatness” and “fat people,” about “Christianity” and “Christians,” or “homosexuality” and “LGBT people.”
Imagine saying the same things you just said about “fatness” and “fat people,” about “Christianity” and “Christians,” or “homosexuality” and “LGBT people.” And in order to do that, you would have to imagine that fatness and homosexuality can somehow be properly compared. Gay people are born gay, and cannot change who they are. While some people are indeed genetically predisposed to become fat, it’s certainly not set in stone. Otherwise, there wouldn’t be such huge disparities in obesity rates between various countries. I hate to break it to you, but fat is not the new gay. As tempting as it… Read more »
No one in this fatphobic culture chooses to be fat. Sorry, but I’m calling BS on that. Being fat is not written in stone the second you are born. There are many steps you can take to ensure not being fat. Or even if you don’t end up thin, you can be at worst mildly pudgy. You don’t have to starve yourself and deprive yourself of all the tasty foods out there. Simply mix in some fruit and vegetables, jog A LOT, perform other exercises, etc. The obesity epidemic in this country is obscene. Even by American standards, this country… Read more »
have been FAT and not fat…trust me, NOT FAT is better!!!
I actually take offense to this. She was a bully. She used her power to have her husband post this on his facebook, then she used her power again to publicly out the guy and even his name….
She’s the bully.
But he was insensitive and an idiot. But in this case she was a poooor role model who actually did the bullying when she claimed to be the victim.
I can’t condone this type of behavior nor would I teach my children that what she did was right.
I wonder if the man that wrote that thinks that all the pretty, thin, young, usually white women with large breasts that are regulars on TV newscasting next to distguished, greying older men is a better message?
She was very articulate and I think a good role model indeed here.
You know Erin, as I said above , I’ve lost a bit of weight. Because I’ve also been hitting the weights hard, I,ve ‘swapped’ about 25 lbs. or so of fat to muscle. I wish I could tell you that to the people I know (friends and Family) that it didn’t change the way they perceive me. Sadly, I can’t say that’s true. I guess it’s just human nature. However, I can say that I truely feel that this is something that men and women experience equally(not that will make either one feel better)
Hey, you know , maybe I’m being too hard on everyone. Maybe they were just being happy or glad for me.
I certainly agree that men can be affected by body issues and weight just as much as women on an emotional level Bobbt. I just don’t think men experience the same pressure women do for their bodies equally…if that makes sense. Although I certianly think pressure on men’s bodies has increased in the last decade. Women have to be young, fit, toned and perky. We are told to get surgery to “fix” our bodies. When the topic of weight comes up, I have heard men of all shapes and sizes mock other women. Even men that were over weight themselves.… Read more »
You know Erin, you have a point! On more than one ocassion, I’ve heard guys dressed in ‘homey’ rapper style cloths (you know, the oversized pants and shirts) simply because they were too overweight to wear any other style, critiqueing women walking by! Anyway, as I said, I’ve found it so enlightening to be able to see the person (and no, I’m NOT trying to ‘hook up’! I have my soul mate of 37 years , thank you very much) Anyway, I don’t believe that I’m unique in my view. Just not as ‘loud’ as the creeps you mentioned. So,… Read more »
Congrats to Ms Livingston for that response! Look’ I have a somewhat unique perspective on this since my weight has flucuated between 190 and 290 pounds in my adult life. I’ve been on both sides of the divide and I really think it’s helped me to look at people as,well people! I mean see initally the person inhabiting the body. I’ve lost about 55-60 lbs through diet and exercise (health reasons mostly) . If I had the power to eliminate words from ever being uttered ever again , it would be “Lazy, fat slob”!
I liked her response also, but I’m about 40 lbs above my BMI.
J.A. , I’m about 35-40lbs. above mine too. You know what my endocronologist told me to do? He said take that B.M.I. number, write it down on a peice of paper, put it in your wallet,and the next time you find yourself with no toiletpaper, you’ll know what to do with it! According to the alknowing B.M.I. #, almost every running back in the N.F.L. is obeise!
Yeah, I read this on the wapo which provided her similar accolades. As much as I’m sure that troll deserved a public flogging, I don’t think this really signifies a confrontation of a bully. Bullying requires a severe imbalance of power between the perpetrator and the victim, however in this case the power is reversed. You have an anonymous, probable basement dweller, venting his frustration with life through a hateful, one-way and ultimately ineffective, slur to a person who commands a superior megaphone and who uses it for retaliation without hesitation. Stepping back, I’m more inclined to consider her response… Read more »