Let me preface this by saying I was 25 when these words escaped my mental filter.
At my girlfriend’s apartment on a Saturday afternoon. I was already showered and dressed for the barbecue we’d be attending later. Lying on her bed, I watched her get ready.
I remember frowning in confusion as she pulled the blue and white sun dress out of the closet. That looks way too big for her. After she put it on, I realized it didn’t look too big, it was too big.
She has to know, right? Apparently not, since she seemed quite happy with her appearance. I simply couldn’t let her leave the house like that. A collegiate swimmer and now marathoner, my gal had a rocking figure. This article of clothing hid that fact; it could’ve also hidden her two marathon training partners.
So I made some subtle suggestions in the vein of, “What happened to that red sun dress? I loved that one.” Alas, she was not picking up on what I was putting down. Glancing at the clock, I realized our ETD was fast approaching. I had to do something to stop this dress disaster!!!
“So, uh, baby, did you get free poles with that tent?”
And that, people, is the dumbest thing I’ve ever said to a woman.
Photo by: LauraLewis23