If you stay with somebody, be respectful. Say thank you and mean it. They’re doing you a favour.
- I always travel to places where I know people, so that I can crash with them. I hate the idea of paying for a hotel.
- You can sleep anywhere if you need to. A floor, outside on a bench, a couch, a chair, a beanbag chair, a car…I’ve done ’em all and more.
- There is a point I get to where I fall asleep and there is nothing I can do but lie down on the couch and pass out. This is why I am both fun and annoying at house parties.
- If you stay with somebody, be respectful. Do your dishes. Buy them some wine. Don’t hang around too much. Don’t monopolize the bathroom. Say thank you and mean it. They’re doing you a favour. Oh, and don’t stay too long.
- Guests are like fish – after 3 days, both start to stink. An old Arabian proverb, according to Al-Qadim, a role-playing campaign setting based in the AD&D world I used to play. Forgotten Realms, specifically. I was always more of a Greyhawk man myself, personally, but…anyway, this is getting off-track.
- I like having house guests, but have had some bad experiences. I try to remember what those were so I don’t repeat them with my friends. So far, I have yet to almost burn down somebody’s apartment or have my dogs shit on their floor, so I think I’m doing well.
- Some couches are bigger than they look. Just take off the back and side pillows, put them on the floor. Borrow a pillow and a blanket and you should be good to go.
- The living room is always super warm. I never knew why that was.
- I don’t know the etiquette when it comes to taking off your pants and sleeping in your boxers as a guest, but I always err on the side of pants…off.
- ‘Crashing with somebody’ is a wonderful remnant of my university days, and I still love to do it. It makes me feel like maybe I’m not a grown-up with a grown-up job. I’m gonna keep doing it. At least for a little while longer…
Never groom in a public space. Always take your hosts out for at least one meal. Write a real thank-you note on paper and send it. Or flowers. (You’ve just snagged $$$$$ worth of free lodging.)