The Onion Reports: Obama Releases 500,000 Good Men From U.S. Strategic Bachelor Reserve

The Onion News Network hilariously hypothesizes a world where President Obama has a secret underground facility filled with a stockpile of highly trained “good men” skilled in the arts of noticing new haircuts, foot massages, and vegetable gardening (for creating homemade pasta sauces.) The supply is rumored to include smart men who don’t spend all their time on the Internet.

(We should—reluctantly—emphasize that this is not in any way true.)

Here’s the entire newscast:


Obama Releases 500,000 Men From U.S. Strategic Bachelor Reserve

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About Lu Fong

Lu Fong was a staff writer and blog editor for the Good Men Project in its formative years. As the requisite woman on staff, her hobbies included cleaning, cooking, knitting, fainting, and childbearing. Follow her on Twitter @lufong.

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