Dear John: Friend’s Drunk Boyfriend Gets Kissy

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About John Simpson,

John is a middle-aged family man from Providence. If you learn from your mistakes, he’s brilliant. His column runs regularly on


  1. Valter Viglietti says:

    “I do think that her knowing you want to drop it but expecting you to be the “bad guy” isn’t fair.”

    Yeah. That’s unloading the burden on husband’s shoulders.
    What she’s asking is not “being supportive”; it’s “Do what I want”, it’s controlling. It’s passive-aggressive.

    Besides, I agree with John: if you didn’t pay for a job, you can’t require a reimbursement. ;)

  2. Why not just suggest to the neighbor that the two of you pick out a new tree for the property line and split the cost? That way he’ll have input on the species of tree, which is going to affect his yard as much as yours, after all. Spin it as a positive thing, don’t even mention the bad pruning. Just say, “the tree isn’t doing well and I never liked that tree anyway, are you interested in splitting the cost of a new one?”. If he says “no,” just say, “no problem, just thought I’d ask.”

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