“How Can I Improve My Relationship With My Boyfriend’s Family?”

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  1. As a dad with a married daughter, I’m gonna give you my 2 cents. I feel for ya in that you appear to think that you have to fill someone else’s shoes. As a dad, I hope that you move away from that way of thinking and bring in your own pair of shoes.

    The ex-fiancé obviously had a substantial history with the family (before being boyfriend/girlfriend) and that’s something, no matter what you do, you can’t replace nor should you try to. The sister that appears to give you a cold shoulder …. May not be because of you but instead her retaliation toward the brother that broke it off? “I’ll show MY brother … I won’t worm up to any girl he brings home.”

    Communication … ever think of talking to the family members?

    “Disinterested” …. Parents become fond of kids friends and if your boyfriend was engaged, I’m sure the parents view of the young lady was that of an expectation that she be part of the family. Although he broke it off, parents may be disappointed. I know that had my daughter broke off her engagement, my wife would have been highly disappointed. Heck, she started planning her wedding as soon as she was born …. It’s a dream that would have been dashed. I would have been greatly disappointed in that she dated him through high school and we got to know him really well as one of the kids “friends.” I really like the guy.

    As a parent, although I care for the young ladies my son dates, I don’t move into that “interested” mode unless there is a commitment. But even at that, I would be cautious because ya just don’t know what may happen with the relationship. Daughter/son in laws are very much part of the family. A lot of dynamics in these relationships.

    I stick with “communicate” with them and let them know how you feel. Personally, as a dad, I would appreciate and admire you for confronting the situation.

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