Shapewear, Brazilian waxes, and other signs of the apocalypse—or at least the end of manhood as we know it.
File this one in the “Strange Adventures in Men’s Grooming” category. For better or worse, more men are jumping into the realm of all-out body care. The Washington Post reports on a whole line of men’s “shapewear” that cuts down on your more-to-love figure and creates the illusion of a body that appears more svelte than it really is.
Let’s see. There’s Spanx, Equmen, and the Belly Buster Athletic Supporter Girdle from Amazon. That last one is especially intriguing. The only thing is, the dudes modeling these products (and the dude at the top of this page) obviously don’t need such a fat-containing contraption. Now that the Corset 2.0 is available for men, just be careful not to faint.
Here’s another trend. First, it was back hair. Now it’s all the hair. Jed Lipinski (no relation to Tara, unfortunately) writes for Salon about his hilarious adventures undergoing the Brazilian wax for the first time.
But recently, when I asked my male friends if they’d ever gotten a Brazilian, they were, in a word, appalled. They became almost angry at my suggestion that it had ever been a trend. Casual manscaping they understood, but why would any sane bro undergo a “Brozilian”?
Of course, it only made sense that Lipinski should travel to the J Sisters, the ladies who brought the Brazilian to the States all the way back in 1992.
Afterward, I took a long walk down Lexington Avenue, clutching the small glass jar of Tranquility Soothing Waxing Cream that Janea had pressed into my hand. I felt shaky and emotional, but invigorated, as if I’d just walked away from a car accident unscathed.
For the full horror story, including Lipinski’s blood-curdling screams and the issue of arousal in the waxing room, click over to the article.
As for why men are taking up this new trend, theories abound. One researcher postulates they’re trying to emulate bodybuilders and celebrities. Another opines that women’s empowerment has something to do with it; if men expect women to get the hair ripped out of them, turn about is fair play.
Either way, ouch.