Why Does My Girlfriend Want To Bleach Her Anus?

 

A man is desperate to find out why his school-teacher girlfriend wants to bleach her ass.

Originally appeared at She Said He Said

Dear Sexes: The other night my girlfriend told me she wanted to get her asshole, or anus, bleached. She wanted to know what I thought of that idea. I froze up, and then our almost discussion got interrupted. How am I supposed to respond to this?  My girlfriend is a high school teacher, and as far as I know, she doesn’t have a secret job as a porn-star or stripper. I don’t think she has an inordinate amount of people staring at her butt or butthole. Personally, I don’t know much about anal bleaching, and the little I do know just confuses me. Why would people go through the trouble to bleach an area that so few others see?  Also, bleach in the anus?  Isn’t that dangerous? Help please!

She Said:  Now listen here, people.  I am a big fan of keeping things pretty and clean down below. I feel bad for my friends who haven’t yet experienced the joy of the almost-bare bikini wax. You think I’m being sarcastic, don’t you? Joy in getting your hairs ripped out? Yes, seriously, joy. It’s so clean! It’s so pretty! It’s so… soft! So keep me in context when I say this: Anal bleaching is batshit crazy. You need to sit down with your girlfriend and make clear to her that she can do whatever she wants with her body but that not once in your life did you wonder if her ass crack could be lighter.  Tell her that there has never been a situation that your boner went soft because of the natural pigment of her flesh. My gut tells me she is watching some porn (with you?) and getting a whacked-out idea of what men expect. While I’m a big fan of non-exploitative pornography, I think it can sometimes cause us to have bizarro notions of what sex should look like. Eli addressed this in an earlier post about why some men find the need to be constantly moving us into every position our bodies can contort into during sex.Great sex doesn’t need the Kama Sutra, it doesn’t need a bright and shiny anus, it doesn’t require expensive toys, not even a slick bikini area. Those things might be fun, but reassure your girlfriend that all you really need is her.For a second opinion, and an excellent belly-laugh, read what Jill Hamilton has to say about her inquest into anal bleaching… Great stuff.He Said:  Why can’t she just bedazzle it? Personally, I’m with you—I would be a bit confused too. But if your girlfriend is intent on following through with her anal alterations, I would just support her (and get educated about the process together).  The anal sphincter darkens over time, mostly due to staining from waste expulsion (pooping). The anus can also discolor because of hormonal changes, or even simply from shaving in that area. This goes for men as well as women.

As far as the process itself, from what I understand, anal bleaching (done correctly) is safe. The process is completed through the (continued) application of a cream, and results happen over time. The cream should not contain chemicals (as active ingredients) like Kojic Acid or Hydroquinone.

Remember, the best thing you can do here is have a conversation. Find out why your girlfriend wants to bleach her anus. Perhaps she thinks it will make her feel sexier, or even cleaner. Maybe she’s just curious. Regardless, if she knows you support her, she’ll feel better about whatever decision she makes. In the end, it’s her anus, and she’ll do with it as she pleases. FYI, there are also creams for nipple and vaginal bleaching, but that’s just between you and me (and hopefully not your girlfriend).

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About She Said He Said

Eli and Josie, friends since college, realized how lucky they were to have one another—an honest friend of the opposite sex who tells it like it is. They wanted to share that with the world and so www.shesaidhesaid.me was born.

Comments

  1. You lucky guy! I bet she’s bleaching because she expects someone to notice… probably you. Stop freaking out and have some fun.

    • cornu_aspersum says:

      At what point would a lover’s altering their body in unnatural ways in order to please start to creep you out? in my opinion, any at all speaks of a disturbing lack of autonomy.

      • I don’t know… Cutting off a finger? Is it creepy to tan? To brush or whiten your teeth? To diet or exercise? To trim your fingernails? Or just the butt stuff?

        Even the guy giving advice above says it’s safe. So… Who cares? Isn’t it common knowledge that many, maybe most, women like their men shaved (no beards) and snipped (no foreskin)? So, I don’t get to upset if someone’s girlfriend wants a lighter anus.

        • Yeah uhh I find the comparison to whitening teeth kind or any of the rest quite odd, since like a bazillion more people get to see your teeth/skin/nails than your arse. You literally have to crawl between a person’s arsecheeks to see it ànd be rather out of it to then think “hey this anus is a bit darky to my liking”.
          It’s true that people can do whatever they want, and if they feel okay with smearing bleach on their anus that’s their thing, but I would make sure it’s not done out of some misguided idea of what is normal.
          Too many people already take rather high risks to fix things they feel ashamed about while a lot of the time their shame will not get fixed through these procedures since it has deeper roots than the fysical aspect.

          Honestly, I wouldn’t feel very comfortable myself if I had a girlfriend that told me she wanted to have a procedure specifically thought up for pornstars.

          • If it’s someone else’s arse and no one’s going to see it, why do you need to “make sure” or “feel very comfortable” about any of it?

            But if it comes down to who sees it, I’d guess more people will see her bleached anus than her molars. Depending, of course on how often she switches dentists and lovers. What if it was a tattoo that would normally be covered with clothes? That she wanted to get for whatever reason? Would you care? Can you honestly say lightening a bit of skin is more invasive and significant a procedure than putting on a tattoo?

  2. If it’s not dangerous, I don’t see how it’s much different from a tattoo or piercing in the underwear region. Whatever floats her boat.

    • Actually, seeing as tattoos and piercings do carry with them a certain amount of potential problems…I’m thinking bleaching actually sounds safer. Go figure.

      • The first thing I think of when I hear “anal bleaching” is the feeling of bad food and a night on the toilet kinda pain, I always figured it would burrrnnn, does it?

  3. Hank Vandenburgh says:

    Okay. That does it. I’m leaving this country.

    ~ Ex Hippy

  4. I think it might help if he were to talk to her and draw out her reasoning for wanting to do this. She might be doing it thinking her guy wants it done or that she is going to surprise him with a new bit of sudden sexiness.

    And if the reasoning is somehow tied to him THEN he needs to have the sit down and tell it it’s not that serious.

  5. I want to really give the guy that wrote in, asking this question, a lot of credit. I really like that he is concerned about his girlfriend’s health, over her aesthetic look, and went even a step further to seek out help by writing in. Really, that’s quite awesome.

    I think he should just talk to his girlfriend about it and ask her why she wants to do this. I personally think that anal bleaching is just another thing used against women to make them spend money and time worrying about their looks. Just another product being sold to women to tell them they are “dirty” and not good enough as they are. It’s possible that this woman is watching too much porn, and as Eli pointed out, could be being influcend by the porn they are watching as a couple. She clearly is getting the message somewhere that her butt needs to be bleached. I can’t help but wonder if this will become normal in the next 5-10 years. If shaving your privates started off this way too until one day, we were a culture so inundated with sexual material that showed mostely shaved privates, that it’s now the “norm”. Most of the things women are suppose to do to their bodies in the name of beauty holds the underlining message that they are either dirty and need to “clean things up” or that they are simply not good enough as they are and “need” these outside things to “improve” them.

  6. Sorry to say, she’s getting ready to ditch you…
    In my day it was lose some weight & get a new hairdo.

  7. I did it… and it has just made me feel a lot sexier.

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