Me:   “My errant psychology began at birth.  Doctor, insensitive Chinaman, yanked and yanked, then grabbed, like a homicidal maniac in Sing-Sing, my sensitive ankles.  Hanged me upside down like a rooster on a farm 15 miles outside Paris.  Slapped me on the ass.  I reached for a bottle of vodka.  Couldn’t find no vodka, [...]