Note: I went to Jarvis C.I. in Toronto.

1. Sometimes, a high school needs to hire security guards to ensure student safety. We had Carlos and Ramon (AKA Mini Carlos). They ensured student safety by selling counterfeit jeans out of a locker and hitting on high school girls.
2. There was a time when everybody at Jarvis was pretty smart. Even the jocks.
3. I was a social floater. I had friends in the following “cliques”: Chinese kids who play cards in the hallway, gangster kids who like smoking in the back, the front steps mostly white English-lit crew, hip-hop Muslims, cafeteria nerds who played bridge, student council keeners.
4. When you go to a public high school downtown, you walk by a lot of poverty on your way to and from school.
5. Everybody is different, everybody is weird, everybody is a bit awkward sometimes.
6. Asking women out on dates when you are (were) unattractive, smell unshowered, and dress poorly is a tough proposition. But if you’re gonna do it, a free ticket to a “Garbage” concert isn’t a half-bad way to go.
7. The talent people show in high school can take them to amazing places. It can also be squandered 10 years later.
8. A rhyming speech can be a fun, gimmicky way to run for a position on student council. It’s all good until your opposition goes up and can actually rap.
9. High school dances (or, as we called them, “formals” and “semi-formals”) are great places to drink coolers or beer and be dumb with your friends. I don’t know why you would go to a high school dance sober (teachers included).
10. Being tired + sitting in class + boobs + wearing sweatpants = embarrassing accidental boner.