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Tired of Being a Bullet

March 15, 2012 By 5 Comments

Rick Belden speaks about growing weary of being busy and longing for nature and serenity.

I’m tired of being a bullet
I wanna be a butterfly.

I’m tired of trying to hit targets
I wanna float
meander
get there when I get there
stop for snacks
pull over and take a nap
absorb the local color
check out some flowers
see the sights.
I’m tired of aim and speed and straight lines
I wanna let the wind take me where it takes me
I wanna zig the zag
loop the loop
go backwards
act on a whim
get lost for a while
and wind up right where I need to be.

I’m tired of my blue steel skin and my gunpowder guts
tired of making holes in things
tired of the bang and the bam and then …
… nothing
I wanna be ancient and new
soft and light
fragile and strong
I wanna migrate
flutter in the breeze
join my tribe in the trees
I wanna go home.

Filed Under: Poetry, The Good Life, Work/Life Balance Tagged With: , , , , , , ,
About Rick Belden

Rick Belden is the author of Iron Man Family Outing: Poems about Transition into a More Conscious Manhood. His book is widely used in the United States and internationally by therapists, counselors, and men’s groups as an aid in the exploration of masculine psychology and men’s issues, and as a resource for men who grew up in dysfunctional, abusive, or neglectful family systems. His second book, Scapegoat’s Cross: Poems about Finding and Reclaiming the Lost Man Within, is currently awaiting publication. He lives in Austin, Texas.

More information, including excerpts from Rick’s books, is available at his website. His first book, "Iron Man Family Outing," is available here. You can follow Rick Belden on Facebook.

Comments

  1. Seth Mullins says:
    March 15, 2012 at 9:12 pm

    I’m working hard on transitioning from “assembly line time” to “magical time” myself, Rick. I think you summarized our culture’s obsession with a tidy, predictable and straight systematic existence brilliantly here, and I so relate to your fierce need to burst those bonds.

    Reply
    • Rick Belden says:
      March 18, 2012 at 3:12 pm

      Thanks, Seth. I think there are probably far more of us than we know who are trying to find a way off the bullet culture crazy train, to slow back down to something approaching heart & soul speed. Many others ache to do so but don’t feel it’s possible, so they just try to keep up, hoping they’ll be rewarded for their efforts with a way out at some point. Many more still are being impacted below the level of consciousness, but are feeling the effects in body, psyche, relationships, etc.

      Reply
  2. Dianna says:
    March 17, 2012 at 10:05 pm

    My attempts to fit the straight line simply resulted in me winding up with Chronic Fatigue and sundry other chronic illnesses – now I do take time to watch birds, breath in the sunset and consider the wellbeing of not only others but myself. I regret being tired most of the time, I don’t regret slowing down and pulling to the side of the road and taking a good look around.

    Maybe if more people heeded your poetry, Rick, they would manage to avoid having their own bodies taking over for some time out.

    Reply
    • Rick Belden says:
      March 18, 2012 at 3:25 pm

      Thanks, Dianna. My experience has been similar to what you shared. Nothing will slow a person down to the true speed of life like a health crisis, especially one that takes someone out of the game for a while. Like you, I would’ve preferred not to have been forced into down time by health issues, but the changes they brought to my life were essential and I’m grateful for what I’ve learned as a result.

      Reply
      • Dianna says:
        March 18, 2012 at 7:07 pm

        Dear Seth

        I will be forwarding your poem onto people who are either in the process of returning to living or perhaps need a little thought on the subject.

        Thank you for this opportunity.

        Reply

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