Marriage is a give and take and it’s not always equal all the time.
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This comment was by CJ in reference to the post – Exposing the Myth of “Happy Wife, Happy Life”
After 26 years of marriage, I would say it simply comes down to throwing out the score card. Marriage is not fair.
Through the years I have found that we have each gone through periods where one of us was on the receiving end of all the goodies (extra leisure time, new fancy toys like cars or trucks, more time with friends, etc ) while the other one was stuck working, at home taking care of kids and chores, “holding down the fort”. Then the pendulum would swing the other way and you might be on the giving end instead of the receiving end. If one spouse gets stuck in the mindset of measuring how much they give to how much they receive, you can be looking at a recipe for disaster, hurt feelings, feeling unappreciated, etc.
The REAL challenge is to be able to take joy and happiness in your spouse ‘s pleasure even when you know “you’re picking up the tab” for it. Think of it as a gift, not necessarily something that has to be repaid. Then when things swing back and you’re on the receiving end, make sure to let your spouse know how much you appreciate their gift instead of acting like a greedy child with too many toys at Christmas time.
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